* Posts by TeeCee

9432 publicly visible posts • joined 5 Oct 2007

CIOs should fear the IP police ... have your get-out-of-jail files ready

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Meh

Re: Need MLKs speech.

Maybe "Julius Caeser" is not the best example here?

I certainly recall being far more impressed at school by a recording of the Berlin Philharmonic playing Beethoven[1] than the version then played by the music master on a shonky upright piano.

He was a bloody good pianist too. The point he was making and it came across very well, was that you cannot even begin to appreciate classical music until you hear it played as it was intended by the composer and by a decent orchestra at that.

I'm not sure that the school had the option (or the budget) to wheel in a full concert orchestra of international quality. For a start, I doubt the acoustics in the gym would have done them justice.....

[1] No, I'll bet he didn't have a bloody license to play it to us.

iPhone denies existence of Gibraltar, other bits of British empire

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Facepalm

Re: Bah!

Typical, bloody typical.

Meanwhile in every other bleedin' country on the planet we have to deal with idiots who reckon "State" is a mandatory item in an address.

Here's a novel idea you might wish to give a trial run to in the USA: Try fixing your own problems before trying to fix the rest of the world.

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Happy

It recognises the Falkland Islands?

Hark, was that sound of the presidential iPhone going into the bin in Buenos Aires, to the accompaniment of the slapped arse of latin-american politics throwing a wobbly?

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WTF?

Re: It isn't exactly difficult

"Why would Apple use anything else?"

What? Comply with standards? Apple? You're kidding, right?

For a start, they wouldn't be able to sue anyone else for using it......

William Shatner confirms Devon town actually prostitute free

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Coat

Re: Bu**er

Best take an ipad with you to give yourself something to do[1] then.

[1] See what I did there?

LCD TV shipments slip for FIRST TIME EVER

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Re: Count me as one who hasn't

"I would lose screen size watching 4:3 content."

Not if you make sure that the vertical dimension of the screen is the same you wouldn't.

Unless of course you're one of these complete bleedin' idiots who reckon that "black bars" are some TV company conspiracy to deprive you of the use of your pixels............

TeeCee Gold badge
Unhappy

Re: Plasma

Plenty of 3D ones too. Also you can sit to one side without the picture being reduced to washed-out catshit, like it is on LCDs, so you don't have to have a long, thin room with the TV at one end to make 'em work. Colour definition tends to be better too, especially in darker scenes.

I reckon they're rather better in well-lit rooms than LCDs are.

But they do use a bit more 'leccy and greenness is evryfing, right?

I seriously regret buying an LCD and would swap it for a similarly specced (and cheaper) plasma tomorrow, were it not for the fact that I need to wring some value out of my mistake first.

Chick-lit naughty girl MP Mensch starts own web-jabber service

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Facepalm

Re: Wow! Yet another social messaging site.

Same place all the other utter arsehats get theirs it seems......

Google blocks MP3 rippers from YouTube

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Coat

Re: Lost skills

It was on Channel 5? That counts as lost.......

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Coat

Re: Legal threats

Surely he actually said:

<WHIIIIRRRRR KACHUNK>

"You have seven days to comply."

Ex-Soviet space gunboats to be FOUND ON MOON

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WTF?

Re: Are they also selling bridges ?

I'm sure that if they did, what you'd actually get would be an old crane lying on its side, with the word "Bridgge" hastily sprayed on it and some planking glued on top.

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Facepalm

Let's see.

Flying to the moon in an antique designed as an orbital station, with some engines cobbled onto it.

What Could Possibly Go Wrong?

I take it that they want all the cash for your ticket up front.......?

I can't help thinking that their target market, of incredibly gullible people who have somehow managed to accumulate 150 million quid, is a rather small one.

Reloaded Doom 3 shoots onto shelves this autumn

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Mushroom

Re: Crap game

"One of the most popular patches for the game was a gun with a flashlight on it..."

Yes and a bloody daft idea that was too. Some guns had lights, some didn't. The compromise that forced in dark areas (and the need to be a bit nifty at swapping weapons sometimes) was part of the game.

The duct tape patch was merely a cheat to make it easier for those too lame to play it properly and too far up their own arses to just admit they were crap and wind the in-game brightness up to "I can see all the time" levels.

TeeCee Gold badge

Re: Peasants

"DX 2 was clock doubled", which made sense.

Then it all went Pete Tong with the DX4, which was clock, er, tripled........

As for which was better, there's no easy answer as it really depended on what was running. In an ideal world, where the prediction / prefetch side gets it right, the cacheing's on the money and the clock-multiplied pipelines can be kept fed, the 2s and 4s win. The downside is that a pipeline stall wastes a shitload of cycles.

I think it's probably correct to say that the multiplier approach proved more advantageous overall, given where we are now.

TeeCee Gold badge

"Was Doom 3 any good?"

Put it this way. It was the first one (and still one of the very few) that I found had to be played with the lights on first time through. It all got a shade too atmospheric in the dark, too many things deliberately put in to fuck with one's head and cause the screaming heebie-geebies[1]. It was the first I played where trouser-soiling moments were caused due to hearing something horribly unpleasant behind me, courtesy of 5.1 sound. Other games had had surround sound, but none had exploited it to the extent that Doom 3 did in my experience.

Fairly typical Doom-y plot (you're on your own, it's nasty, shoot stuff before it kills you), loads to get through, lots of serious gory mess and liberally stuffed with ohshitohshitohshit back-to-the-wall-and-hope-the-ammo-doesn't-run-out moments. It scores over earlier Doom versions with the interactive kit all over the shop (I can play a video game in a video game - WTF?), decent NPCs, smarter bad guys and..........that atmosphere.

Probably the only thing that lets it down is that the ending is a shade too easy. I think that Id knew that and overcompensated in "Resurrection of Evil", by putting in a final sequence that's perishingly close to impossible to beat. Having said that I aced the ending of the original DOOM first time through without a scratch (and a repeatable technique too - quite the coup at the time it was), so maybe they were deliberately going for nostalgia in 3.....

All-in-all it still ranks as one of my all-time favourites, so going back to the original question, I have to say yes.

[1] E.g. <Tortured voice in left ear> "Saaaavvvvveeeee Meeeeeee" </Tortured voice in left ear> - and it means it too. Amusing after the fact, when the gag becomes apparent, but more "Wtf was that? Oooooooohhhhhhh Shiiiiiiittttttt" at the time.

Fatties are 'destroying the world'

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Facepalm

Aha!

"...there would be a strong incentive to reclaim the streets from motor vehicles..." (my emphasis).

So he's one of that bunch of barking wingnut Luddites then? Those muppets just can't resist dropping their pet slogan in at every opportunity as if it were Holy Writ.

Eco-fiddling.

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WTF?

Eco-fiddling.

This one made me chuckle.

A colleague aquired a new flat on the South Coast not too long ago. At purchase time, much was made of its eco-credentials and the builder had got a nice bung off the government for complying with all the latest arsehattery.

Fairly recently, a bulb blew. He gets out a spare bulb, goes to put it in and finds it doesn't fit. It turns out that in order to qualify for the eco-fiddling grant it must be possible to only fit low-energy bulbs as replacements. To accomplish this, the whole place is equipped with the new "standard" socket which has three bayonet pins at 120 degree intervals instead of the usual two at 180.

Now the horror story. The only people making these "standard" bulbs are Philips, who are currently charging "still cheaper than hiring an electrician to rip out the socket" prices. Over 30 bloody quid a bulb! For a very ordinary CFL with three pins on the end instead of two.....nice work if you can get it.

I wonder how many expensive lunches Philips had to buy to get the (previous) government to sign up to that?

'Kindness of America' snapper shot himself in 'act of self-promotion'

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WTF?

Re: HPD

"Histrionic Personality Disorder,"

There's a medical term for "Fuckwit"? Who knew?

Brussels could 'clash' with London over UK snooper's charter

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Holmes

'Maybe not everyone understands the Treaty of Lisbon'

What? You mean that convoluted doorstop, desperately trying to disguise its pretentions as a Constitution by hiding all the contentious bits under thick layers of multilingual-friendly diplomatese, might be less than a paragon of simple clarity?

I'm shocked, I am.

Steely Neelie: EU is crippled by its clueless tech-ignorant workforce

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Facepalm

I can haz web page?

I'm forced to wonder how many of those who apparently can create a web page actually mean that they used to have a Geocities account and once made some coloured text blink?

Next question. These 700,000 European vacancies. How many of 'em will actually be in Europe rather than India, The Ukraine, The Philippines.............? Ah! Thought so.

Olympic Phone touch-payment details revealed

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Strap line.

Is that an allusion to this earlier article?

IBM storage kit keeping admins awake at night

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WTF?

".....wake at 13:50AM."

What planet is your time zone on?

Samsung S3 finally catches up with the Palm Pre - if modified

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Coat

Don't you mean; I'm sure that in five years' time Apple will have invented this technology three years ago?

"Rewriting history" is passé, it's "Retroactive IP portfolio management" now.

America's X-37B top-secret spaceplane returns to Earth

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Headmaster

Re: wholy wow!, batman!

"...assist in landing breaking?"

It breaks on landing? I thought it was supposed to be resuable.....

Can't watch Flash vids in Firefox? It's not just you

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Joke

Alternative approach.

Anyone affected could always try using another browser that doesn't have these issues.

Like IE..............

Tumbleweed-plagued Google+ is minus Bejeweled and Wooga

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Facepalm

Re: Tumbleweed-plagued Google+

"....MUCH bigger and comprehensive than Facebook or Twitter, it's the best bits of both."

So it's fuck-all then?

ICANN eggfaced after publishing dot-word biz overlords' personal info

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Re: in regard to the whole gTLD "choose your own" auction (now fiasco)

Easy one. Why not?

<Sound of heavy bag of cash being placed on table>

Outrageously old galaxy spied birthing new stars at furious rate

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Coat

Re: 'The Max Planck institute'

They haven't got the time to study trees.

They're studying the scientific stuff........................constantly.

Asteroid zips past Earth

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Coat

Re: "at about 20:00AM this morning"

Er, that's five minutes past midnight. They must be using a Nixie clock with Russian tubes.

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Facepalm

You'll be winning a tenner which, in lottery terms, is the equivalent of a 500m rock missing the prize by 5.3 million miles.

Another investor pulls out of Habbo Hotel after grooming claims

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Headmaster

Re: "Its spelt surely not shurely."

"...a parentheses...."

Keep digging, we can still see your head.

Girl Geek Dinner lady: The IT Crowd is putting schoolgirls off tech

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WTF?

Re: "lack of women in IT is a worldwide problem"

Really? When did (for example) Saudi Arabia and Iran make English their principle language? I seem to have missed that announcement.

Sole British 'naut Major Tim embarks on NASA deep space mission

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Coat

Film script: Finding NEEMO.

<Opening Credits>

"It's straight down, you can't miss it."

<The End>

W3C: 'Do not track' by default? A thousand times: NO!

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Facepalm

Re: W3C - The finest standards that Google can buy.

Sorry, I had sort of assumed that other advert-floggers would be keen on this one.

Silly me. I forgot that Google has a de facto monopoly[1] in this area for a moment there.

[1] An entirely non-evil monopoly of course.

TeeCee Gold badge
Mushroom

W3C - The finest standards that money can buy.

Nice to see that the advertisers' lobbying cash and junketing budget hasn't been wasted.

Where's the "Snout in trough" icon?

Oracle staffer accused of sex-for-favours in Singapore

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Re: Pics or GTFO

Or just click on the link thoughtfully provided in the article to the piece in the Straits Times, which has a pic.

Rather amusingly, said pic is attributed to "Facebook". Said attribution usually translates as: "Actually owned by an unknown person and posted by them or one of their mates on Facebook, which is where we stole it from."

Volkswagen Up!

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Coat

Re: Frankfurt Motor Show

I've heard that there's a customisable version in the offing. The purchaser will be able to specify individual panel colours, choose from a range of window tints, add a variety of styling accessories and also pick one of a wide selection of interior trim levels and materials.

Create a car that is unique: Up Yours.

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Re: Surprisingly thirsty?

You are comparing apples with pears.

The size of this thing precludes the fitting of a larger, heavier turbodiesel engine. It's intended City Car use precludes the use of a DPF and these are now mandatory on oil-burners. Thus a petrol engine is a must.

The sweet spot for fuel consumption, if you're fuel-agnostic, is the Focus size.

Smart meters are 'massive surveillance' tech - privacy supremo

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Coat

Re: You may not tell BP how you drive

"I suspect this is true of all modern cars that have EMU's fitted."

My car doesn't tell anyone anything and hasn't got a clue who's driving it. Does this mean it has an Ostrich fitted?

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Coat

Re: But moving to a different time is useful

Yes, that confused me too.

Why doesn't he just move into a spare, dry wing of his in-laws' palace?

Facebook changes data-use policy despite 87% poll opposition

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Happy

Future protestors need to go Old Skool.

Pwn the dormant accounts and vote the dead!

Male, female Chinese 'nauts prep for trip to Heaven and back

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Headmaster

"The lab has already managed to couple with Shenzhou-8..."

What was wrong with the word "dock" in this context?

Did the presence of a female astronauttaikonaut in the manned mission give you a case of the Freudian slips here?

Global warming helps Arctic algae suck CO2

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Coat

Re: Backronyms

Alternate Rocket Startup test Environment?

Apple-Moto patent gripe almost thrown out the door

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Happy

Silence?

"Neither Google nor Apple had returned a request for comment at the time of publication...."

Well Apple never talk to you anyway and Google are probably too busy drinking champagne and pissing themselves laughing at the moment.

I wonder if Google managed to keep straight faces when the Judge returned his "You can shove your evidentiary hearing up your arse" response to Apple.

Hands on with Nintendo's Wii U

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Facepalm

Re: last-gen

Hmm, exactly the same criticism levelled at the original Wii: "OMFG everyone else has HD graphics, this thing's dead".

Then it pwned the market, leaving Sony and MS looking rather puzzled to find that gameplay actually trumps eyecandy.

The mass market for consoles is those bought for kids to have fun with rather than serious gamers to count pixels on. Who knew?

TeeCee Gold badge
WTF?

Re: Catchy name

Well presumably the Wii-like thing under the telly in the pics is a Wii U and the gamepad controller for it is the, er, Wii U GamePad.

"Wii U WiiPad" would be even more weird a name.

Euro 2012: England is semi-final probability

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Facepalm

"Dr Ian McHale, senior lecturer in statistics in the University of Salford"

So, not cleaned up on the fixed-odds footy betting and retired yet then Ian?

Keep working on those models........

GAGA: Spinning blades, welding, wi-fi, what could possibly go wrong?

TeeCee Gold badge

Re: Yep, that castor wheel will get stuck. However....

Not sure about that. Too much opportunity for the balls to pick up dirt, bits of chopped grass, dog turds etc and gum up the works.

The reason that mice went optical is that the ball ones used to gum up regularly[1].......and that's on a desktop, not out in a garden.

[1] The first IT hardware fix I ever did was to declag the mouse ball on an early Apple Mac, converting it from an expensive paperweight back into a computer.

Thumbs down and Comments

TeeCee Gold badge
Happy

Re: Here's a really fun one ...

I think the problem there was that you didn't tell 'em upfront you were trolling, not so much as an icon on that first post. If that genuinely was posted as a troll, you should congratulate yourself for it going so well!

After that I reckon everyone just assumed you were backpeddalling to the "troll" position after being hung out to dry and went in with the flamethrowers on "reheat". I made the mistake of attempting to justify myself once when one of my trolls touched a nerve. Never again. Better to just shake your head knowingly, take it on the chin and slink away.

I note that my cheesy snipe at the septics (Low-hanging fruit, you have to really.) in that thread did quite well......

Twitter bird reborn to the sound of whalesong

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WTF?

How does this work?

"...There’s no longer a need for text, bubbled typefaces, or a lowercase 't' to represent Twitter."

I guess that one of those "Optional hardware updates" that I see on Windows Update must be the "Twitter bird" key for my keyboard then?