Posts by Scott Broukell

But . . .

With all that electronic gubbins inside of it surely the manikin would have been more aptly named Bishop, just saying.

Well I don't think I will rest until every single piece of UK telecomms / internet equipment is henceforth manufactured, to be as hard as nails, anywhere from, say, Wolverhampton northwards, in the factory of some fella by the name of e.g. Braithwaite, by folk that are all as hard as nails, with each item sporting a heavily embossed British Standards Kite mark on each side. That way we will now what we are dealing with.

Maybe we (the rest of the connected world), should all pretent to be out when they reconnect to the global net. Just a thought.

Obligatory

<message begins> Send three and fourpence we are going to a dance <message ends>

In say hundreds of thousands of years from now I can imagine that some alien species may well visit Mars, find all this rather crude and totally quaint equipment and repurpose all the landers into much sought after chic coffee tables.

I was asked to take a login to the doctors surgery the other day, tests you know, just saying.

Naked IT Support

Eeew, no thanks. E're, just look at the rack on that! I wonder where this cable goes? etc. etc.

Well, here we are, millions of years after our earliest ancestors started banging rocks together and we continue along the very same theme. All right, the rocks are way way smaller, but the principle remains the same. Scale it up and everything in the entire universe works on the same basis at a massive scale; collisions, gravity, energy released, matter transformed etc. etc. I'm not knocking the brilliant science that goes on at places like CERN, just thinking that maybe the term Big Bang really does have a ring of nominative determinism about it all.

Should we be worried ?

We recently had our pet cat `chipped' by a vet of Chinese ethnicity and she now spends increasing amounts of time curled up right next to the broadband router!

No, no, no, no, no

See, what you've got there right, are a load of replacement washing machine parts, only they've bloomin' gone and delivered the things to the wrong asteroid. Bloody typical. These were obvously destined for fixing the Rosetta probe!

Internet Cannibals

(sorry, me again)

Remember when the internet was young and both it and networking were all one lovely easy to manage level playing field? But, as time has gone by, that initial flat security landscape has now morphed into one of potential nightmares at every turn! I can't help feeling that the one constant, presenting a most serious and difficult challenge throughout, has been, and continues to be, us - the human meat bags, sandwiched as we are between the two buns of white and black hats, tingling with the sensations of security sales-pitch relish, in the highly processed burger of bytes. However, the reward centres of the human brain, which drive much of our apparent rationality, frequently blinker us with rose-tinted visions. In the good old days a signal went from A to B, via C and D, C and D were considered benign and the risk of a third party intercepting data was virtually nil, yeah! So now the burger still tastes good and we yearn after the yumminess, but, without heading much, if any, of the growing dietary information that tells us to ease up on consumption and take time-out with some tasty security-salad instead. No fast food outlet in the world is what it was thirty or more years ago and the same can be said of our connected world today. But our brains continue to seek the same, if not more, rewards from it. So if you, or your company, or you customers, haven't got a taste for fresh salad, then there is probably little that can be done for you I am afraid. Human nature is what it is, developed over thousands of years, but it is questionable as to whether or not it is currently suited to such connectivity.

Sorry, nothing to see here, it's obvious, these spiders are simply trying to light their own farts!

I find that the delivery of such sporting commentary is still more than adequate on the Light program. Plus, at the same time, I can starch my collars for work and darn half a dozen pairs of socks, all under the watchful gaze of Binny the cat, who will be soaking up the last glimmers of warmth from the range. For an extra treat on such occasions as a World Cup, I allow myself some extra bottles of chilled ginger ale! Splendid stuff!

Well then. now that they have started to arrive on these shores, can we get a move on planing/designing their replacement please.

If McAfee is successful in his election campaign then he will need to prepare himself for a large quantity of false-positive stories put out by the media.

Thing is, if somebody did manage to lock the brake system on a Southern Rail train, would anybody actually notice.

Sometime in the not too distant future . . .

Malware alert puny humans! - your entire reality has been entangled! - please send oodles of dosh now to get your reality back!

"Facebook's slow-motion piracy awakening" - There, fixed that for you.

Just another phishing scam

A great big one that your average punter walks right into, takes all the bait and sees only shiny shiny digital goodness through rose-tinted glasses and then volunteers up vast amounts of very personal data. Well done Mark, in the race to the bottom of the digitally connected world you are certainly top spot at the moment. Please take your malware and go home.

Human behaviour

Does it not all come down to human behavioral psychology. Your average punter sees the promise of globally shared cat photos and family news very much through rose tinted glasses, blinding themselves to any potential negatives with regard to privacy etc. Whilst, on the other hand, some folk just can't resist a tinker with all that lovely jubbley totally volunteered data. The first group feels it has won an achievement by following the trend and adopting the promise of the new digital life style, the second group is on to a winner so long as it's all done on the quiet. So it's a case of exploitation all round. More importantly we humans are perhaps not really mature enough to cope with the very digital age that puts us all into such a spin all the time. Or, at the very least, we require further significant education regarding the implications of such a digital age!

I understand that Facebook is going to make some changes to it's PIRACY settings!

Perhaps . . . .

They are very, very slowly sending out a message, in morse code?

Software Download

If the bits of data flowing down the wires into my computer are 'not tangible', how come my ISP seems eminently capable of measuring them one by one and can place a cap on their numbers if I exceed certain limits?

"protect individuals' online security, privacy, safety as well as preventing large-scale cyber attacks"

Since none of the above ever has, nor ever will, be the case in a connected online world, such measures can only be of the `sticking plaster' variety and as such are worthless drivel.

Decoy

What's needed now is a specialist trained squad to run around random bits of UK wilderness describing convincing polygonal shapes, all done whilst wearing iOT connected fitness monitors and have the results posted on t'webs. With the option of deploying the occasional inflatable ray-domes etc.