back to article Flamin' Nora! Brit firefighters tackle blazing fly-tipped boat

The UK's battle with fly-tipped vessels reached new heights last night after a fishing boat was set ablaze in northern England. Tyne and Wear Fire and Rescue Service said they had been called to a quarry in the area after reports of a fire and found a burning boat on a trailer. A crew from #SunderlandCentral Fire Station have …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Some things you can't even freecycle....

    Well, not once you've set them on fire...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Mushroom

      Re: Some things you can't even freecycle....

      Some things will attempt to freecycle/recycle you back!

  2. Stratman

    "Doncaster Council had to deal with an abandoned speed boat last year."

    Bullseye has a lot to answer for.

    1. Alister

      Bully's speedboat

      "Let's look at what you could've won!"

      Bastard!

    2. wolfetone Silver badge

      Well it's only since Jim Bowen's sad passing that this issue has come to the forefront.

      Coinkydink? I think not.

  3. K

    Get this round my area..

    Its always in the same spots, theres a little hidden Cul-de-sac, at the end you'll frequently find dumped beds, couches, fridges etc etc... actually somebody even left a caravan!

    What frustrates me, it happens so frequently (at least 1-2 times a week), that it would be worth the effort to setup surveillance (just some hidden cameras) for a few weeks, to identify the constant perpetrators - Then jump on them all at once! It might be costly, but it will get the message out.

    1. kain preacher

      Re: Get this round my area..

      I was watching a local station news. On this one street people keep on dumping on Sunday What do the cops do? Nothing so the local business set up cams. The dumpers don't care that cams are all around. Oh they are just dumping on the street.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Get this round my area..

        This is purely because of the extortionate costs of dumping rubbish at the council owned tips.

        They cannot grasp the simple fact that the country is on its arse still from 2008 and people WONT pay the exorbitant fees charged to remove fridges, mattresses and other white goods.

        Particularly if you turn up to the dump in a van, then its "commercial" waste which costs even more to dispose of.

        Only have themselves to blame.

        Councils are penny wise and pound stupid, they consider saving a few pence in the immediacy a greater success than saving pounds further down the line.

        1. Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse

          Re: Get this round my area..

          To be honest, I don't think you've ever been able to dump a speedboat at the local tip, even if you offered to pay for it. If you are the scumbag owner who is thinking of fly-tipping, the best way to rid yourself of an unwanted boat is simply to scuttle it at sea and make sure you go down with it as it sinks.

          1. Mark 85

            Re: Get this round my area..

            If you are the scumbag owner who is thinking of fly-tipping, the best way to rid yourself of an unwanted boat is simply to scuttle it at sea and make sure you go down with it as it sinks.

            Or scuttle it and claim the insurance. Win-win. Boat's gone and money on the pocket. I've heard of car owners doing that here in the States.

            1. DiViDeD

              Re: Get this round my area..

              "I've heard of car owners doing that here in the States"

              Not just in the States. Back when I lived in the leafy Home Counties, there were a couple of locals reminiscing at the pub. Someone brought up the weather, which led to the drought of 1977, which led to one of them leaning back and saying "Yeah, I thought I might be in trouble back then. I remember driving past Staines Reservoir and I could see the aerials of all the cars I'd done insurance jobs on"

        2. rg287

          Re: Get this round my area..

          This is purely because of the extortionate costs of dumping rubbish at the council owned tips.

          I wouldn't go as far as to say purely because of that, but it certainly doesn't help.

          Our tip runs to £3/bag for rubble. A small task of pulling out a 70s fireplace ran to £30. For £60 you could rent a small skip (delivered & collected to/from your house!) which will take 35+ bags, so that's undoubtedly a tidy earner for them.

          Of course, the tip is run by the County Council, fly-tipping is the responsibility of the District Council... if the County Council had responsibility for fly-tipping, they'd likely find the overall costs tipped in favour of encouraging people to bring stuff to them...

        3. kain preacher

          Re: Get this round my area..

          Were I live they have freed dump day once a month and they take every thing, yet people still do illegal dumping.

        4. Tom 35

          Re: Get this round my area..

          "This is purely because of the extortionate costs of dumping rubbish at the council owned tips."

          Some people will not pay anything, and even if it was free some would still dump it where ever it was easy.

          1. MJI Silver badge

            Re: Get this round my area..

            Seen household garden waste dumped over a wall into allotments, phoned up Police no interest whatsoever.

    2. Rich 11

      Re: Get this round my area..

      theres a little hidden Cul-de-sac, at the end you'll frequently find dumped beds, couches, fridges etc etc... actually somebody even left a caravan!

      Shh! That's where Julian Assange is planning to hide out when his current hosts have finally had enough of his charming company.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Get this round my area..

      Around here the main offenders are from the local traveller "community" and they keep a watch on their preferred dump site. Nobody wants to set up cameras because not only will the cameras be destroyed but the vehicle used by the people that place them may have an accident involving at the least keying and at most mysteriously catching fire.

      1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

        Re: Get this round my area..

        the people that place them may have an accident

        That's what comes from having a society with stupid levels of gun control.

    4. GruntyMcPugh Silver badge

      Re: Get this round my area..

      @K

      Sme here,... the route to one of my regular dog walks starts near the entrance to a disused school, down a cul-de-sac. There's often fly tipping by the old school gates. Addly, most recently, an '02 plate BMW has been abandoned there. I checked it out on the https://www.gov.uk/check-vehicle-tax web site, and it's taxed and MoT'd so no clue why it's been left for getting on a month now. The lady (we call her 'The Oracle' because she knows all the local gossip) that lives at the end of that road reported it to the Police,.... and all they have done so far is give it a parking ticket (as it's on double yellows).

  4. MCMLXV
    Flame

    I name this vessel...

    ... Boaty McFireface

    1. Anonymous Custard
      Mushroom

      Re: I name this vessel...

      Boaty McBurntface surely...?

    2. TRT Silver badge

      Re: I name this vessel...

      Thunderchild.

      The Martians released their black smoke, but the ship sped on, cutting down one of the tripod figures. Instantly, the others raised their Heat Rays and melted the Thunder Child's valiant heart.

      Lashing ropes and smashing timbers

      Flashing Heat Rays pierced the deck

      Dashing hopes for our deliverance

      As we watched the sinking wreck

      With the smoke of battle clearing

      Over graves in waves defiled

      Slowly disappearing

      Farewell Thunder Child!

      Slowly disappearing

      Farewell Thunder Child!

  5. Kaltern

    Buoyant Binned Boat Burns Before Brave Bonfire Botherers Banish Blaze.

    1. Spacedinvader
    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      El Reg

      really ought to employ you as their pun machine.

      1. Kaltern

        Re: El Reg

        I don't think my mind works on demand.. I just have to wait for the urge to take over.......

        twitch

        1. Alistair
          Pint

          Re: El Reg

          @ Kaltern:

          I don't think my mind works on demand.. I just have to wait for the urge to take over....... .. or the meds to wear off??????

          *grin*

          when it does you earn one

          1. Kaltern

            Re: El Reg

            Pint.. meds...

            It's all the same to me.

            1. Aladdin Sane

              Re: El Reg

              Could take meds by the pint.

  6. }{amis}{
    Go

    Sir Nelson??

    What are you doing setting fire to boats there the Spanish are further south!

    1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge
      Headmaster

      Re: Sir Nelson??

      1. Sir? I think you mean Lord.

      2. You appear to have been referring to the Spanish Armada. That was a couple centuries before Nelson's time.

      1. Voland's right hand Silver badge

        Re: Sir Nelson??

        referring to the Spanish Armada. That was a couple centuries

        Pedantry alert :

        The Fleet at Trafalgar was a joint French - Spanish one.

        1. ArrZarr Silver badge
          Headmaster

          Re: Sir Nelson??

          @Volands right hand

          Counter pedantry alert:

          While the Spanish Armada of 1588 was at anchor near Calais, the English navy used fireships to cause the Spanish to cut their anchors and scatter out of formation which allowed the English to close in and attack.

          The only firing at Trafalgar was of the "Shoot, Bang, Fire" variety.

      2. Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse

        Re: Sir Nelson??

        Trafalgar itself is down near Cadiz so we'll allow the slight confusion shall we?

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Sir Nelson??

        NOBODY expects the Spanish Arma<thwack>

        Sorry, wrong gag.

      4. Vincent Ballard
        Coat

        Re: Sir Nelson??

        @Dr Syntax, Spain still has an Armada. The word just means Navy.

    2. Vulch

      Re: Sir Nelson??

      ITYM Sir Francis.

      The current King of Spain is bearded...

  7. x 7

    Go back a few decades, stealing and burning small boats wasn't unusual.

    It was done to get at the copper (=rustproof) nails used to build them. The nails would be sold as scrap

  8. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

    Fly-tipping boats? Amateurs. This is real fly tipping: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-coventry-warwickshire-44055845

    1. Twanky

      This is real fly tipping?

      A shipping container? Nah. This is REAL fly tipping: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-england-london-36033602/fly-tipper-dumps-three-tonnes-of-waste-in-south-croydon-road

      Scumbags.

      Edit: Argh! I can't believe I linked to a Flash Only version of this vid... Sorry.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cOKLXrXI9Ig

  9. Warm Braw

    I was born in Sunderland and hundreds of years of cumulative fly-tipping is about the only thing that would explain it...

    1. Aladdin Sane

      Are you attempting to explain Sunderland or your birth?

  10. Missing Semicolon Silver badge
    FAIL

    If it wasn't so stupidly expensive to dispose of stuff...

    ... this would happen a lot less.

    Our local council has started charging £3.50/bag for disposing of rubble.

    1. sabroni Silver badge
      Meh

      Re: If it wasn't so stupidly expensive to dispose of stuff...

      Central government has been reducing the amount council's get for years. They can do it because they know that the council will be blamed for reductions in service levels.

    2. Antron Argaiv Silver badge

      Re: If it wasn't so stupidly expensive to dispose of stuff...

      Re: disposing of rubble

      Around these parts, they run it through a crusher, grade the output and sell it as sand or gravel for fill.

      The same is done with old paving material. Also sold as a base for paved roads, bike paths, etc.

      // one man's trash is another man's treasure

    3. Iad Uroboros's Nemesis

      Re: If it wasn't so stupidly expensive to dispose of stuff...

      If you’ve got the money to buy a boat, you’ve got the money to dispose of it...responsibly. TCO.

      If you’ve fallen on hard times, tough titties. You should have thought of that...and, at worst, give it away for free.

      I think tip rates and conditions are perfectly fine and reasonable.

      1. JimC

        Re: If you’ve got the money to buy a boat,

        You don't know boat ownership. Buying a boat is very cheap, people almost give ratty old boats away... If people fancy the idea of speeding round the water with the wind in their hair and bikini clad beauties on the foredeck it seems like a very good deal. But what the new owners find out very soon is that owning and running a ratty cheap boat is even more expensive than owning and running a new flash expensive boat, and so its soon back on the market very cheap, and hey, you can hardly give them away, the cost of disposing it legally is about twice what you paid for the boat and the wife is whinging about the lump on the drive and...

  11. TRT Silver badge

    What we really need to know is...

    did they rescue the boy from the burning deck?

    1. Alister

      Re: What we really need to know is...

      did they rescue the boy from the burning deck?

      ...and did he have both his legs?

      1. TRT Silver badge

        Re: ...and did he have both his legs?

        Ah! He had a woman's legs! I'll wager those legs have never ...

        The boy stood on the burning deck,

        Whence all but he had fled;

        The flame that lit the battle’s wreck,

        Shone round him o’er the dead.

        Yet beautiful and bright he stood,

        As born to rule the storm;

        A creature of heroic blood,

        A proud, though childlike form.

        The flames rolled on – he would not go,

        Without his father’s word;

        That father, faint in death below,

        His voice no longer heard.

        He called aloud – ‘Say, father, say

        If yet my task is done?’

        He knew not that the chieftain lay

        Unconscious of his son.

        ‘Speak, father!’ once again he cried,

        ‘If I may yet be gone!’

        – And but the booming shots replied,

        And fast the flames rolled on.

        Upon his brow he felt their breath

        And in his waving hair;

        And look’d from that lone post of death,

        In still yet brave despair.

        And shouted but once more aloud,

        ‘My father! must I stay?’

        While o’er him fast, through sail and shroud,

        The wreathing fires made way.

        They wrapped the ship in splendour wild,

        They caught the flag on high,

        And streamed above the gallant child,

        Like banners in the sky.

        There came a burst of thunder sound –

        The boy – oh! where was he?

        Ask of the winds that far around

        With fragments strewed the sea!

        With mast, and helm, and pennon fair,

        That well had borne their part,

        But the noblest thing which perished there,

        Was that young faithful heart.

        1. Stevie

          Re: ...and did he have both his legs?

          I prefer Spike Milligan's version:

          The boy stood on the burning deck whence all but he had fled.

          Twit.

        2. Alister

          Re: ...and did he have both his legs?

          The boy stood on the burning deck

          His lips were all a quiver,

          He gave a cough, his leg fell off

          And floated down the river.

  12. Overflowing Stack

    Fly-tip, no. Sharks with lasers...

    They must be to blame, surely?

  13. MJI Silver badge

    Fly tipping

    There is a nice BOAT on my commute, I use it on sunny days when not in a hurry.

    Once saw fly tippers drive in as I left. Next time I see one I am going to bully them into the mud so they get stuck then drive off.

    Or take pictures and get them to follow me, and of course they would get stuck!

    Those are the sort of roads Solihulls finest can deal with errant vans, especially when in groups.

  14. Christoph

    Viking Funeral?

    Did they look round for any burly chaps with horns on their helmets?

  15. Blockchain commentard

    Tricky insurance claim. They're supposed to torch it at sea to get rid of any arson evidence.

    1. Aladdin Sane

      And bodies.

  16. Grant Fromage
    Coat

    Perhaps it wasn`t that serious

    Surely they were just firing a boat?

    (Sos, meds definitely not working)

  17. Anonymous South African Coward Bronze badge

    No Captain's log in this one then?

  18. Stevie

    Avast!

    I guess this Mary Ellen Carter will not be rising again.

  19. Hud Dunlap
    Joke

    I have heard of cow tipping, but Fly tipping?

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cow_tipping

    Flies seem a might small to tip over.

    I will get my coat.

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