back to article Dori-no! PepsiCo boss says biz is planning to sell lady crisps

The boss of PepsiCo – the parent company of Doritos – has suggested women need their own lady crisps, apparently so they can keep their mouths quiet and their fingers clean. Indra Nooyi told Freakonomics Radio that "young guys" will happily lick the orange dust off their fingers and guzzle down the broken bits of crisps at the …

  1. Paul Crawford Silver badge
    Facepalm

    My sordid imagination was profoundly disappointed to learn that "lady crisps" were not any sort of anatomical reference.

    Still, good to know that MBAs are providing value to their employers.

    1. Jellied Eel Silver badge

      They might exist, but if you do find them, she's no lady. But the world's gorn mad. What next? Yorkies for women?

    2. Teiwaz

      Lady crisps

      I thought it was a medical condition....

      1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge
        WTF?

        Re: Lady crisps

        The French have beaten them to it, with a range of pseudo-British products including:

        http://www.regentspark.fr/nos-produits/lady-chips-legumes

        complemented also by Sir Shortbread, and others (although I'm not sure who would admit to a penchant for Lord Muffin...)

        1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
          Thumb Up

          Re: Lady crisps

          They sell King Bacon! Sign me up immediately!

          1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

            Re: Lady crisps

            I take it back! King bacon advertises itself as perfect for the true gentleman's sunday brekkie with eggs. Which is fine.

            But then suggests putting it in a salad sandwich! Quelle horreur!

            Ban this sick filth immediately!

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: Lady crisps

              But then suggests putting it in a salad sandwich! Quelle horreur!

              A BLT? Quite civilised by French standards,

            2. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: Lady crisps

              > But then suggests putting it in a salad sandwich! Quelle horreur!

              What is wrong with the salad sandwich? Just put it on top of your eggs, sausages and bacon.

              And put a steak in it, for taste.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "Because girls don't like to lick their fingers or drink the crumbs"

    Or swallow. Apparently.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      laden or unladen?

    2. MyffyW Silver badge

      Well who wants to swallow something that has the texture of frogspawn, the aroma of household bleach and is served lukewarm?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        > Well who wants to swallow something that has the texture of frogspawn, the aroma of household bleach and is served lukewarm?

        Stop! You're making me hungry.

  3. This post has been deleted by its author

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "Because girls don't like to lick their fingers or drink the crumbs"

    Speak for yourself, I have known plenty of girls that love prawn cocktail.

  5. JohnFen

    Why is that a "lady thing"?

    I'm a man, but I hate getting that orange crap all over my fingers too.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Why is that a "lady thing"?

      That's how this always works.

      Identify a frailty in women.

      Don't bother to check if it exists in men too.

      Spend ages researching if this causes the gender pay gap, campaigning for special considerations for all women because they get this thing, insisting this is why women should stay in the kitchen (delete as applicable)

      Discover men get it too and you'd have known that if you spent five minutes finding out.

      Waste your life.

      Impostor Syndrome, Hysteria, Aversion to orange crap on your hands. The cycle repeats and repeats.

      Ladies, let it be known that most of the time we men hate the same shit you do. But some of us (and some of you) don't and that's fine as well.

      1. Trilkhai

        @Mycho

        "Ladies, let it be known ..."

        What makes you think women in general think that we believe we're delicate little flowers who avoid eating things like Doritos because they're crunchy?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: @Mycho

          I'm curious that you interpreted my words that way.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Why is that a "lady thing"?

      Perhaps there's Something Else you need to tell us?

    3. Tim Seventh

      Re: Why is that a "lady thing"?

      "I'm a man, but I hate getting that orange crap all over my fingers too."

      Option 1 - I'M HAVING IT ALL: Open bag of chips and pour chips into your month. Grab a bag of chips for both hand for double enjoyment.

      Option 2 - CHIPS STACK: Buy large none orange chips and use it to scoop up orange chips. The higher the stack, the better.

      Option 3 - CEREAL BUT BETTER: Open bag of chips and get a spoon to scoop up chips. The bigger the spoon, the more chips you'll get.

      Option 4 - CAN I HAZ CHIPS: Ask your partner to grab chips and feed it to you. Warning, your partner might finish all your chips before you get any.

      Option wtf - IM A DINOSAUR: Clean the table first, then put chips on the table. Rawr your way through and pickup chips with only your mouth. Warning, this may cause unintended reactions when seen by 3rd party.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Why is that a "lady thing"?

        > Open bag of chips

        Bagged chips? Ack! Wouldn't they get all soggy?

    4. 45RPM Silver badge

      Re: Why is that a "lady thing"?

      @JohnFen

      You’re (probably) safe. I don’t think that Donald Trump is that into you.

      For what it’s worth, I think Melania feels the same way.

    5. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Why is that a "lady thing"?

      "I'm a man, but I hate getting that orange crap all over my fingers too."

      Say no more. Nudge nudge.

  6. Alistair
    Windows

    Apparently

    I'm not married to a *lady*. But I'm not sure I'd want to cope with the fallout that is gonna land on this terrible comment from an execudont*.

    Wait... This is the same pepsico.......

    * i.e. How not to executive.

    1. Sir Runcible Spoon
      Coat

      Re: Apparently

      If you were (like I am, apparently) you would realise that once the doors are closed and the servants abed that 'ladies' turn into the feeding equivalent of a werewolf pack at full moon set loose in a kindergarten, plus they swear a lot (but well).

      When my wife is indulging in a large bag of crisps all I can see are her the tips of her ears and her hair. Everything else is in the nose-bag, including both hands. It's quite a spectacle I can assure you, and the noise would send a velociraptor scurrying for it's mummy.

      1. Alistair
        Windows

        Re: Apparently

        @ Sir Runcible:

        Mine cares not where the servants are or who might be popping in the door. And in her case its not so much chips, but dear lord don't look sideways at her chocolate or you'll be needing medical attention.

  7. vir

    Don't crunch, no flavor dust, hmm...are they just going to individually wrap pieces of sandwich bread?

    1. Not That Andrew

      As someone on Twitter said, it appears they've invented the stale crisp

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Apparently Walkers were going to do this as well but it would seem ladies also don't like bags of air.

    1. TheVogon

      "it would seem ladies also don't like bags of air."

      Unless Bulgarian of course.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        @TheVogon

        Or Boris Johnson's partners (many according to popular myth)

    2. Michael Thibault

      "bags of air"

      Any product revision broadly in the category of food ('snack' or 'convenience") is a bit of legerdemain to raise the price -- typically by changing the portion size while keeping the price constant -- which is ultimately a scheme to increase remuneration to management for the important value they bring to the company by suggesting such revisions. There's something poetic about it all.

  9. Am

    Use chopsticks

    No more orange fingers!

    It's not the orange fingers I mind - it's the forgetting my fingers are covered in the stuff and leaving orange dust forever glued on random surfaces.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Trollface

      Re: Use chopsticks

      The sound of crunching is nothing compared to the sound of laughter you must hear when someone sees this.

  10. Banksy

    Not eating the bits at the bottom....

    is madness! You get all of the extra flavouring down there. Granted, I don't lick my fingers after eating crisps while I'm at work.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Not eating the bits at the bottom....

      Not eating the bits at the bottom....is madness

      Let's face it, the actual tortilla chip is merely an edible spade in this context. If they sold bags of concentrated flavouring and food dye, we could cut out the corn altogether.

      Used to be the case that if you bought cheap cheesy snacks, every so often you'd find a large nugget of pure, unadulterated flavourings, salt and additives, which was bloody marvellous.

      1. MrZoolook

        Re: Not eating the bits at the bottom....

        Bacon Streaks were good for that.

    2. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      Re: Not eating the bits at the bottom....

      I don't get it. Doritos flavours are universally horrible - except for the lightly salted ones. But they are conveniently shaped like shovels. Hence their use for getting guacamole, sour cream and/or salsa into my mouth. Which conveniently then requires it to be washed through with some reviving liquid - preferably blended from 3 parts tequila, 2 parts lime juice and 1.8 parts triple sec.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    For those that have not heard it...

    Man goes to the doctors complaining that his penis is orange. The doctor looks at it and says 'Do you work with chemicals? the man replies 'no' 'Well' the doctor say 'Do you lift heavy equipment? again the man replies 'no'... 'Well, what do you do all day?' asks the doctor... the man replies 'Watch porn and eat wotsits'

  12. Hollerithevo

    Do project managers live in the world?

    Surely the BIC pink pen debacle, along with upteen other failed products aimed at women, that seem to have either been dreamed up in some chap's head or based on a very odd sub-set of potential customers, would ahve given Pepsico pause. But no.

    But I guess suggesting that they can launch a snack that makes no sound and leaves no crumbs or dust (cheese string??) is easier than paying your female staff equal wages.

    I know, crazy!!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Do project managers live in the world?

      Apologies all around, but I had to post this.

      https://www.amazon.com/Apollo-Tools-DT0773N1-Screwdriver-accessories/dp/B000GUTJRY

      (if SWMBO is reading this it'll be another cold night at the sofa!)

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Do project managers live in the world?

        > https://www.amazon.com/Apollo-Tools-DT0773N1-Screwdriver-accessories/dp/B000GUTJRY

        What is amazing is "Customers who bought this item also bought...". Especially on the third page:

        https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0773NXGTK/

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Do project managers live in the world?

          What is amazing is "Customers who bought this item also bought...". Especially on the third page:

          And only a little further on we find "Best Quality Wood Screw Assortment"

        2. Allan George Dyer

          Re: Do project managers live in the world?

          Hmm... the pink tool set is just a pink tool set, the closest they get to saying they intend it for a woman is the rather neutral, "Parents find it an empowering gift to give children as they leave the nest. " At least the tools appear to have normal functionality for a tool set. Happy Stan destroys the function of the tool by making it a joke. Then, on page 5 of the "also bought" is:

          https://www.amazon.com/TANKING-Shaped-Folding-Defense-Keychain/dp/B01NBICV9C/

          is a 2-inch pocket knife in a fake key a concealed weapon? Would anyone be stupid enough to use it in self-defence? Hopefully, the only damage will be to whatever the owner uses to carry it.

        3. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Do project managers live in the world?

          And that one is often bought together with this one...

          Makes one wonder.

          https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0091CC1OG

          Wish I could use the GIMP icon, but alas, I am a coward behind a different mask. :D

      2. Antron Argaiv Silver badge
        FAIL

        Re: Do project managers live in the world?

        In my experience, the tools in these "tool kits" usually fail the first time you attempt to use them.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Do project managers live in the world?

          I am seriously tempted by this tool kit. I'm going to be moving in the next week or two so no long distance mail order before then but I still might.

          Also the lemur fursuit people often buy with it intrigues. I'm not usually that way inclined but lemurs are so cute.

        2. Michael Thibault

          Re: Do project managers live in the world?

          "these 'tool kits' usually fail"

          These kits are glorified security blankets; they typically include large numbers of incredibly inexpensive-to-produce fiddly bits of little value and little use in order to pump up the item count to make it seem as though there's a deal to be had. The one or two included items that ever get regular use is what the purchase price is really buying -- functionally a price gouging almost without equal. Ultimately, they're a false economy -- pink or otherwise. And, on the subject of colours: pink is a bitch to coordinate.

      3. earl grey
        Devil

        Re: Do project managers live in the world?

        Have to laugh as there's a mess of those type tools that some company donated to the Habitat Restore where I volunteer. They sell them every once in a while, but i try to convince males that it will keep other blokes from fondling their tools.

        1. Shadow Systems

          At Earl Grey, re: pink tools.

          My dad used to dip all his tools in pink, rubber grip fluid that also made them electricly insulated from the hand that gripped them. For example a wrench that would otherwise conduct large amounts of power straight up the holder's arm instead had that path blocked by the dried, pink, rubberizing goop.

          It had the added benefit of making them incredibly hard to loan out, or at least that's how it appeared to my little kid eyes as someone would come over & ask to borrow something, see all the "!PINK!" tools, & hastily backtrack away like a scalded puppy.

          If I knew what the insulating goo was called I'd post it here for others to make use of, but a quick internet search should reveal it if it still exists.

          I remember the stuff all too vividly because I once tried to dip one of his tools to see if it worked. Unfortunately my little kid mind at the time didn't think things through. The goo had dried & had hardened into it's permanent, iron like coating before I realized I'd dipped the *head* of the wrench instead of the handle.

          *HeadDesks repeatedly in embarrassment*

      4. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Do project managers live in the world?

        Worse of all it is described as 'Amazon's Choice for "ladies tool kit" ' !!!???

        [Good God in Heaven are Amazon in a Time Warp circa 1950s ???]

        <Joke>

        This is why there is a Gender Pay Gap ....... only a Man has the 'Cojones' to suggest this AND get it accepted as a 'Selling Point'. !!!

        Obviously, worth every extra penny.

        </Joke>

        P.S. If this was actually suggested by a Woman then there is still much work that needs to be done re: working together for an objective.

      5. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Do project managers live in the world?

        I did not realise that if 'Tools' are not a Pinkish hue they don't work for Women !!!

        <Cough> Anything you are thinking now is purely down to your own fetid imagination, nothing to do with me !!! :) :)

        [Images of Driven Snow, gambolling Lambs and Fluffy White Clouds etc :)]

      6. Peter Ford

        Re: Do project managers live in the world?

        I don't see the problem with this: it doesn't actually say anything about being a "ladies tool kit" aside from the Amazon categorisation. It does have a connection to a breast cancer charity, but how is that gender-specific?

        If someone wanted a pink toolkit, maybe just to differentiate it from others, then this is cool. It might stop all the dickhead "alpha" males stealing it...

        1. Cederic Silver badge

          Re: Do project managers live in the world?

          Yeah, I love that they've created a product that appeals to a broad demographic then had the confidence to let customers choose for themselves whether it's something for them.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Do project managers live in the world?

          Late to the party by 4 months, but at a former job site we got pink tools for exactly that reason.

          We pushed it through purchasing as "to be better visible and more unique than standard orange hi-vis, so things don't get left in the wrong spot"

      7. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Do project managers live in the world?

        I salute the link to the handyman's tool! Although I must say, at first glance I thought it was "The ultimate Ladies toolbox", i.e. combs, hand-pliers, brushes, staples... that kind of stuff you see women applying to their faces while sitting in the tube (well, a long steel can traveling underground in the once capital of the world, aka London). But then, the hammer-shape in the middle made me stop... think... lick my orange fingers...

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Do project managers live in the world?

      @Hollerithevo:

      Do project managers live in the world?

      Project Managers very definitely live in the (real) world - they're the poor bastards who have to implement the insane fevered imaginings of more highly-paid Product Managers.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Oy! Re: Do project managers live in the world?

        I am a Product Manager, and I resemble that remark!

    3. Tim Seventh

      Re: Do project managers live in the world?

      a snack that makes no sound and leaves no crumbs or dust (cheese string??)

      Not directly related to your comment, but anything they do are probably just going to be reinvent

      -cheese stick

      -potato wedge

      -fried chicken

      -beef jerky

      -chocolate

      -dry fruit

      or some other food/snacks already available on the market that make no sound and leave few crumbs.

  13. bombastic bob Silver badge
    Devil

    Reminds me of "New Coke"

    c-c-c-catch the wave - New Coke!

    (complete with Max Headroom doing the commercial)

  14. Franco

    Oh brilliant, just as the world decides rather than let women wear some more dignified outfits whilst advertising tat at sporting events they'll just ban them out right and replace them with kids, ignoring the fact that this is the ONE job in the world where women are guaranteed to be paid more than men.

    Not liking having sticky hands after eating crisps is not a gender specific quality, nor is the amount of noise the food makes. EVERYONE is self-conscious if they are the only person in the room eating something noisy.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      EVERYONE is self-conscious if they are the only person in the room eating something noisy.

      I'm not. I really couldn't give a toss. Well, at funerals and weddings, my court appearances maybe.

      Anyway, what the hell will this "uncrunchy crisp" be like? I presume something like a lettuce leaf with bleached Dorito flavourings sprayed on after being mixed with Copydex. So no crunch, no powdery bits no yellow fingers. I think I'll leave them to the ladies.

      1. Robert Carnegie Silver badge

        "Anyway, what the hell will this "uncrunchy crisp" be like?"

        For decades food scientists - male and female - have been carefully and ingeniously engineering the physical sensation, as well as the sound, of eating crunchy foods, for the greatest satisfaction.

        So now they just need to not do whatever they do to make the crunch e.g. leave out the brittleness enhancer or whatever.

        "Munch," will go the uncrisps.

        Or just take the regular kind and put them in your mouth for 5-10 seconds before chewing.

        Or eat something healthy instead.

  15. KeepCalm

    <insert word>'tard

    1. ...this is the boss of PepsiCo,... perhaps she is slightly more informed than your average <insert word>'tard on twitter or el reg preacher.

    2. ...if women don't want to buy the crisps they won't. if men do want to buy the crisps they will, and the crisps will be rebranded for men. if nobody buys them they will make no money and be axed. the problem solves itself.

    1. BrownishMonstr

      Re: <insert word>'tard

      The problem with branding them as gender specific, or even specific to any group, is people outside of that group or do not want to associate with may not want to buy it causing loss of sales. If you're marketing something for old people, you've lost potential customers outside of your target market (even if they would find it easier) and people within it who wouldn't like to think themselves as old.

      1. tony trolle

        Re: <insert word>'tard

        I remember yorkie bar adverts for men, and flake adverts for women

        1. The Nazz

          Re: <insert word>'tard

          "flake adverts for women"

          Oh, i dunno, the flake adverts i recall were definitely for hormonally challenged teenage boys. And men too.

          Moving on, when in the company of attractive ladies i love to lick my fingers afterwards. Nothing like being appreciated is there. Mind you, anyone notice it's very difficult to get those same ladies to have a lick of your fingers?

          Moving on again, i'll just mention that my SO doesn't mind me crunching food, at all. She does however draw the line at me showing other people what i'm chewing.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: <insert word>'tard

            Anyone remember the advert that promised "A finger of fudge is just enough to give your kids a treat"?

            Wonder if you'd get away with that these days?

            AC - political correctness gone mad

        2. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

          Re: <insert word>'tard

          "I remember yorkie bar adverts for men, and flake adverts for women"

          The Yorkie adverts were always tongue in cheek. The Flake adverts got blokes interested because they all fancied the blond in white dress sail languidly along in her row boat. Eating a Flake brought that image to a blokes mind.

          1. tiggity Silver badge

            Re: <insert word>'tard

            I liked the Phallake skit (NTNOCN IIRC but CBA to web search it)

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: <insert word>'tard

        re. branding, I have recently seen a... tent. Designed for women, by women. And don't you dare making jokes about... and... not to mention... NOT ALLOWED! And yes, a price to match.

  16. Frenchie Lad

    El Reg's female staffers eat a pack

    So you have equal scoffing hopefully you have equal pay as well?

  17. alain williams Silver badge

    I thought the point was going to be ...

    of a 'Lady Crisp' that it was something that would let her eat and keep talking at the same time.

    Disappointed to read that it was just about fingers -- which I also don't like getting mucky.

  18. FozzyBear
    Devil

    Yep the world really is going to hell in a hand basket.

    1. Michael Thibault

      "going to hell in a hand basket"

      Is it fair trade, though?

    2. Shadow Systems

      At FozzyBear...

      Not only is it going to Hell in a handcart, it's strapped on a JATO unit to each side of the trolley & has gotten out to push trying to make it go faster. =-j

  19. Martin 47

    Where’s the ‘Dorito’s are not crisps?’ option?

  20. tony trolle
    Trollface

    thought we had them.

    think they are called pringles, hell they even did Pumpkin Pie Spice Flavor

  21. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    Dear PepsiCo: Call them 'Incognito Doritos'...

    ...and market them to everyone. But first sack your marketing team - everyone from the marketing director downwards.

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It works both ways...

    My 'Savile' range of teenage pump action facial products failed horribly, and I'm still unclear why. I just hope my 'Harvey' range of catering-size lube tubes - 'for when you need to slide in without anyone noticing' - works better in the market.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I once...

    Got a lump about the size of a fist entirely of "flavour" in a packet of Tesco Own Brand. I should have got on tv/in the papers with a photo of it... but really, I could not be bothered.

    1. Roj Blake Silver badge

      Re: I once...

      I once (many times, actually) had a bag of Tesco crisps with no flavour whatsoever.

      At least now I know where it went.

  24. earl grey
    Paris Hilton

    Never mind eating the crumbly parts

    The best is wetting a finger and sliding around the bottom of the bag to collect all the tasty bits.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Never mind eating the crumbly parts

      Erm. We are still talking about crisps, aren’t we?

    2. Pedigree-Pete
      WTF?

      Re: Never mind eating the crumbly parts

      @Earl Grey. Oh dear, OCD, it is only me then who opens the crisp packet fully via the seams so the inside of the bag becomes a flavour coated silver "plate". Getting the flavour then simply involves a slightly wet finger and no corners to lose flavour bombs in. Ah well wanders off muttering.....PP

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'm surprised at you all!

    "are you a delicate lady crisp nibbler or a dedicated man snack muncher? " got absolutely NO comments at all?

    I'm a delicate lady nibbler. I would like to meet a "man snack muncher".

    I hope she doesn't mind if I take my sweet time nibbling at her crisps, I certainly wouldn't mind her making lots of noise munching on my snack!

    /s

  26. Milton

    The Era Of Stupid

    What a good thing we don't have to live through a time of mindlessly superficial stupidity and vacuously imbecilic marketing ... oh.

    There's a line in Sherlock where Mycroft admits that being brilliant means that he feels as if he's living amongst goldfish.

    I imagine Reg readers in particular must feel actual, physical pain listening to marketurds, politicians and corporate management-speak. We may not all be "brilliant" but we are suffering agonies through the Era Of Stupid. Not least because the internet has given goldfish a voice.

    1. Roj Blake Silver badge

      Re: The Era Of Stupid

      What's it like to have an IQ of 150?

      Imagine you've got an IQ of 100 and everyone else is a 50.

      1. 45RPM Silver badge

        Re: The Era Of Stupid

        @Roj Blake

        That doesn’t work though, does it? It wouldn’t even work if you said “Imagine you've got an IQ of 100 and everyone else is a 66” because the scale upon which the normal distribution is plotted isn’t linear.

        This explains why there are so very many more muppets in the world than geniuses (if the scale were linear then there’d be very many more geniuses than there actually are).

  27. chivo243 Silver badge
    Headmaster

    Isn't this just

    Pringles? With Doritos flavor? Prior Art?

  28. sequester

    And what about non-binary crisps?

    This is just another tool of the binary agenda. There must be crisps for every identification and orientation.

  29. msknight

    I would respectfully suggest...

    ...to Indra Nooyi, to get out and get a life.

  30. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    handbag-sized packets

    how about micro-sized ones? You know...

  31. quxinot

    ....

    I hate all of you.

    You prevented me from making a joke along the lines of "that reminds me of my ex..."

    Bastards.

  32. MrZoolook

    If women don't want orange crap on their fingers...

    ... they shouldn't insert them into Donald Trump!

  33. tim 13

    How can you have uncrisp crisps?

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      soak them in water for a few seconds...

  34. Nimby
    WTF?

    Wrong Direction

    Something like an edible Silly Putty smoked tofu and almond serviette (napkin) might almost have merit. Pull edible serviette from separate package glued to side of PepsiCo Crisps With Class. Primly roll over skin of hands to clean them of crisp dust. Ball up and toss into (almost) empty bag. Shake bag to absorb crumbs. Remove serviette from bag and pop into mouth for glorious last bite. Also sold separately in these exciting flavours...

    Still noisy, but with the right marketing, that may even be the hook: Show boys how silly they are. Make a show of enjoying the crunch. All the fun of eating crisps without all the mess.

    But what do I know? I'm just a software guy.

  35. Grant Fromage
    Coat

    Hard crisps vs Floppy crisps?

    I think it`s a backward step, I assume they will be by implication smaller and less dense.

    "Lady crisps" have reminded me of one of several tales from a nurse ex, that really should not be accessed prior to eating.

    I am going to say minimally "chapped lips", and try to shut down the images her detailed description evoked.

  36. Bucky 2

    I'm confused by the gender politics.

    I'm curious about the new crisps, but I'm not a woman.

    Should I not be, because I'm a man? Exactly what is the uniqueness that women have, that I do not share, that would guide them to choose one snack food over another?

    It's likely that my view is flawed and simplistic, but I don't know how to learn unless I ask. How is this not sexist? I don't get it.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      A study looking at deodorants long ago discovered that people don't buy unisex deodorant. Labelling it as for their sex makes people more willing to buy it, even if there is an identical product labelled as for the opposite sex and/or unisex.

      I'm suspecting there is evidence that this may also apply to crisps. If you make 'crisps for women' then women will buy more crisps.

  37. skeptical i

    Lady Crisp is not the latest apple hybrid?

    Too bad, Pink Lady + Honeycrisp might be tasty.

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