back to article Nailing a cloud project without killing Bob boils down to not being a tool

Don't be like Bob. You remember Bob, right? Tasked with building the company's cloud. Sinking in a quicksand of managerial buzzword bingo and ever-changing requirements, burdened by a lack of resources. Bob was under pressure, which produced tension at home, and Bob quit the job resulting in the company's cloud project …

  1. jake Silver badge

    Note to Bob:

    I make very good money pulling companies back out of the cloud. It is a rapidly growing field. I'm hiring. I pay top dollar to folks with clues. I am not alone. Check your local job listings. Looking forward to hearing from you, or others like you. Be well, Bob!

    1. cd

      Re: Note to Bob:

      I guess I don't have enough clue, cannot find a way to PM you.

  2. Pascal Monett Silver badge

    All valid points, with one caveat

    If the management cannot stick to the plan, all your points are moot.

    So basically the success of any complex project is based on whether not management can cope with not interfering all the time. The rest is par for the course, but you can have the most brilliant team in the world and the project can still fail if manglement can't stay away long enough for stuff to get done.

  3. John Smith 19 Gold badge
    Unhappy

    Funny, that same script could have been said of any large IT project to do anything

    In the last 50+ years.

    It seems an operating mode the British Civil Service (and their Ministerial "masters") are incapable of following.

    1. DJ Smiley

      Re: Funny, that same script could have been said of any large IT project to do anything

      There's a simple explanation to why as well. No project will ever be 100% successful.

      No project large enough be taken on by them, would ever be complete in a timeline that they operate in (4, 8 years, etc).

      Therefore, any (every) project passed over to someone else, is doomed to have it's failure shouted from the rooftops, as the other guy dropping the ball. Even the ones that _do_ go well!.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Article forgets that

    Even if Bob had delivered - that means all future "Agile" projects also can proceed with vague requirements, unrealistic delivery deadlines, and bizarre connectivity that spider-webs your corporate information assets around the globe.

    I have seen the "Agile" PM pressuring for random, unstructured technical change. The consequences can be as disastrous as delivering the platform itself....

    And no, my procurement team does not seem to have considered contracting in for retrieving our data in the event of pulling out, the unplanned outages some cloud vendors seem to delight in etc.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Agile means that

      there is no time for documentation, resolving technical debt and such niceties as a disaster recovery plan that is also tested to oblivion. DR testing does not fit easily in a 2-3 week cycle. It can take months. The Progress charts tend to look bad with a huge item that is outstanding for months on end.

      As for 'Bob', I equate him to MBA speak with a bit of techo babble thrown in and the ability to waffle in front of PHB's to paint a good picture.

      One 'Bob' I encountered was called 'Clive'. I was the saboutuer brought in to ask the awkward questions to Clive. The Q&A session started just before the mid afternoon break. Those 10 minutes were sheer torture for him.

      Clive went to the toilet and like many of us have experienced with a date, was never seen again.

      1. MyffyW Silver badge

        Re: Agile means that

        As for 'Bob', I equate him to MBA speak with a bit of techo babble thrown in

        Harsh, given Bob's background established in the previous post.

        He's a human being.

        His name is Robert Paulson.

    2. Wensleydale Cheese

      Re: Article forgets that

      "... and bizarre connectivity that spider-webs your corporate information assets around the globe."

      "Bizzare connectivity".

      Must remember that one for meetings to come.

  5. DainB Bronze badge

    The solution is simple

    Stop caring. There's nothing for you in success or failure of that particular project and all associated stress.

    It's only a job.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "at no more than a 45-hour working week"

    And theres the problem, Management see this as a precise figure and expect people to work it. Rather than you'll get more commitment from staff, by giving them flexibility.

    I've been lucky here, as my employer offers flexible hours and working from home, for these, in return, I probably do 50-60 hours a week, as I love my job.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    All well and good but...

    ...this is a guide to managing a project as its mentioned in text books. Which is totally ruined when you have a digital director who is clueless and wants "everything in the cloud, NOW". Ignores all logic from IT and just classes them as "negative and devoid of vision" and as "blockers".

    1. Lysenko

      Re: All well and good but...

      I suggest studying how the Civil Service deal with such matters. For all the bad press they get, they are experts at neutralising clueless twits which is how the country managed to survive politicians. The most basic tool in the armoury (besides watching "Yes Minister") is to get everything in writing - particularly when you are being ordered to implement a "courageous" policy with huge attendant risks.

      You wouldn't want the poor chap to be passed over for the credit after all, so make sure he signs (on paper) the document enumerating exactly what could go wrong and crediting him, personally, with the vision and fortitude to ignore the naysayers, laugh in the face of danger and pull the trigger.

  8. Erik4872

    Learn to filter brainwaves

    I'm currently in the middle of a forced "DevOps by management consultant" transition. None of what everyone is saying is totally out to lunch, but the sheer volume of opinions and information coming at you from all sides is overwhelming when there's an actual IT environment to run as well.

    The key thing to realize is that people 2 or more levels above you are being wined and dined by cloud salesmen, and they have been plugged into the information firehouse at the high level. That translates down to my boss getting 2 AM emails from a super-excited puppy-like "cloud strategist" asking him when we can implement CI/CD by, or why we're not orchestrating Kubernetes containers even though they have no idea what that actually means. The only way to deal and keep your sanity is to learn to filter some of this out.

    With all the cloud and cloud tool salesmen leaning on the IT strategy people, plus everything that doesn't involve the cloud or containers being called legacy regardless of age or usefulness, combined with the intense fear of missing out or being left behind, it's not surprising that we have a ton of Bobs out there. I'm hoping that the second dotcom bubble burst will slow things down to a sane level and we'll take what makes sense back into the real world...but I still haven't seen the top of the bubble yet!

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Facepalm

    Techies tend to be poor at communication

    "A lot of Bobs suck at documentation"

    No we don't, we're obsessive over documentation. It's the senior technically illiterate technical managers who don't read it and or ignore what their own technical people tell them. Because they can't be caught actually talking to someone with less status than them.

    "No project is perfect from start to finish but us techies tend to be poor at communication"

    I beg to differ, us techies are very good at communication, the problem is invariable at the other end where, no matter how many times you say-text-email it - it doesn't go in. The problem is 'upper management' doesn't want to know. For instance, it is exceedingly ironic to work for a company with 'communications' in the title where there isn't any going on internally. You have to find out about the company's 'vision' by reading the trade papers :)

  10. Chemical Bob

    This is a TERRIBLE article!

    Don't be like Bob? WTF? I'm a *wonderful* person. A legend in my own mind if I do say so myself.

    'Don't be like me', BAH!

    Now get offa my lawn!

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