back to article After stiffing us with Trump, Weiner 'fesses to underage cock shot rot

Disgraced politician Anthony Weiner has finally realized what the rest of the world has known for some time. "I have a sickness," he confessed while entering a guilty plea for having texted pictures of his penis to a 15-year-old girl, "but I do not have an excuse." The former Congressmen for New York agreed not to appeal a …

  1. Eddy Ito
    WTF?

    And the reason the sentence is so very much shorter than the Secret Service employee is definitely not because of his political connections.

    Go ahead, pull the other one.

    1. handleoclast
      Coat

      pull the other one

      The other one??? He has two??????

      No wonder he did all that sexting, if he has two of them to pull.

      BTW, "wiener" (also spelled "weiner") is Merkin for penis. Presumably for its resemblance to a sausage of that name. This could therefore be a case of nominative determinism, where his surname influenced his activities. I may submit it to Nude Scientist, which often publishes examples of nominative determinism (despite swearing many years ago to stop).

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: pull the other one

        While I have to sympathize with the guy (I was about to write "feel for the guy", but that would have come across a little weird.), I believe the Reg missed a great opportunity to write one of those double-entandre-filled masterpieces which it's readership so pruriently loves.

        A talented writer could have done a lot just editing "the long-running Weiner sexting saga" some. Or comment that threatening Weiner with a trip to "chokey" might be cause for arousal instead of fear.

        Well, hopefully Anthony Weiner will be able to rebuild some kind of meaningful career and life after he is out.

        BTW, the documentary about his mayoral run in New York City is supposed to be a really good film, as it records both his campaign and the second and final implosion of his political career.

        1. bombastic bob Silver badge
          Joke

          Re: pull the other one

          " I believe the Reg missed a great opportunity to write one of those double-entandre-filled masterpieces which it's readership so pruriently loves."

          El Reg comments will make up for it

          /me reaches for some mustard. gotta slap some mustard on the wiener, and get them buns nice and hot!

          Wiener is more like "whiner" now, anyway, wiith his "I have a disease" excuse. No, not a disease. Just an obsession. A criminal one.

          Didn't Wiener request photos from the teenage girl he sent his wang-pics to? Wouldn't he be in possession of CHILD PORN as a result if she'd sent him a naked pic of herself?

          And there's Wiener's (former) wife Huma - that's a double entendre if I'd ever heard one.

          Next headline: Hillary Clinton divorces Bill over HIS infidelity, gets engaged to Huma. Film at 11.

          And then if Huma runs for president, who would be 'first lady' ? HA HA HA HA HA!

          Oh, the entire spectrum of this situation is RIFE with potential sexual humor!

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: pull the other one

            Didn't Wiener request photos from the teenage girl he sent his wang-pics to? Wouldn't he be in possession of CHILD PORN as a result if she'd sent him a naked pic of herself?

            Yes, that would be considered possession of child pornography because she was a minor. If he requested it he would also be guilty of soliciting.

            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_pornography_laws_in_the_United_States

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      of course not

      He is simply in a state of permanent 'sexual emergency': He cant help himself

      Anyway the girls were gagging for it.

    3. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge

      How does the crooked justice system work in the USA?

      Quite so, Eddy Ito, .... let us be more specific.

      How come a US Secret Service agent tasked with protecting the White House has started a 20-year stretch for sending explicit snaps to underage girls ….. reported here by El Reg.... whilst disgraceful politician Anthony Wiener, doing essentially practically exactly the same, escapes with a jail sentence of between 21 and 27 months?

      Do you pay dodgy folk slush money?

      1. Eddy Ito

        Re: How does the crooked justice system work in the USA?

        "Bailiff, whack his pee pee!"

  2. Version 1.0 Silver badge

    Truth or Consequences

    He obviously has a problem - and because this is America, nobody has ever tried to help him overcome the problem or seek treatment. Each time he's punished because we all know that punishment works ... except when it doesn't, which is most of the time.

    I'm not trying to excuse his behavior, he's behaved like a schoolboy who's just discovered that his "bits" can move by themselves. Most boys grow out of the need to show this to other people (unless in private or the showers at school). But some do not and he's one of these - he's a suitable case for treatment, had society dealt with this the first time, Trump would not be President. And so the problems will continue.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Truth or Consequences

      >Each time he's punished because we all know that punishment works ... except when it doesn't,

      For anybody but him I agree. That fsck deserves brain cancer.

      >had society dealt with this the first time, Trump would not be President.

      Or perhaps if the US was bit more open towards bi/lesbians for higher office Huma wouldn't have needed a pervert significant other for political cover.

    2. the Jim bloke
      Joke

      Re: Truth or Consequences

      "- and because this is America, nobody has ever tried to help him overcome the problem or seek treatment "

      I thought everyone in the US had a therapist, (except for the ones who dont) and Merkins embraced psykeye-ettry the way asians do herbal medicine.

      used to be called stereotyping, current buzzword is unconscious racism?

      Of course if someone is being paid to work on an issue, it may not be in their financial interest to FIX that issue...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Truth or Consequences

        It's America he needs to shoot the pedo in him with a gun to the head. I saw it on a documentary once.

        1. bombastic bob Silver badge
          Devil

          Re: Truth or Consequences

          someone pointed out before, that it's not 'pedophilia' to lust after a 14-15 year old. 'pedophilia' generally applies to pre-pubescent kids. Lusting after a teenager is just normal male hormones doing their thang. Fortunately MOST adult men (not Anthony Wiener) have brains and know NOT to do anything with it.

          https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ephebophilia

          /me points out that men are pretty much genetically hard wired to prefer women in the 16-25 range, with 'high estrogen' characteristics and healthy skin/hair. This is why the COSMETIC INDUSTRY exists, and why nobody ever tries to look OLDER [unless they're under 21 and want to go to a bar].

          yeah 'wrinkle cream' that makes you look like you're 90 - that'd be a big seller!

      2. Missing Semicolon Silver badge
        Happy

        Re: Truth or Consequences

        <German accent>"That will be SIX million Alterian dollars, if you could just credit my bank account....."</acent>

    3. Mark 85

      Re: Truth or Consequences

      He obviously has a problem - and because this is America, nobody has ever tried to help him overcome the problem or seek treatment.

      We, as readers and not in the inner circle, don't know that. It's quite possible that after the first episode, some of his staff and friends did try. Given the nature of politics and privacy, unless someone actually comes forward and says "I tried to help him.", we'll never know.

      I'm not defending him... he should have found help. It's out there and one would think that after the first time, he would have sought if nothing else to defuse the situation. But he didn't (as far as we know) and if he had, treatment would have brought out in court instead of his admitting he was in denial.

    4. Chemical Bob

      Re: Truth or Consequences

      "had society dealt with this the first time, Trump would not be President. And so the problems will continue."

      Or it was the Clinton Campaign changing course the last 2 weeks before the election to hammer on the pussy grabbing thing instead of what was working - portraying Trump as a crazy racist. Among other blunders:

      https://www.theregister.co.uk/2017/05/02/clinton_election_loss/

  3. adnim

    I consider

    anyone and everyone, regardless of gender or sexuality does indeed have a sickness if they send images of their genitals to children.

    So hospital or prison?

    imho, someone that recognised they had an "illness" would seek psychiatric/medical help BEFORE being caught.

    1. Version 1.0 Silver badge

      Re: I consider

      I agree - but when I went to school (luckily in the days before anything other than film cameras) the most popular entertainment (English State School) as kids was showing each other how everything worked, what could be produced and who could perform the most, the fastest, and the furthest. We were kids, it wasn't just me - well over half the class (15+) boys in my all boys school, were fascinated by the progress of our development.

      Kids are curious - it's what makes us human, and kids will play with anything that moves. Kids at that age and that time didn't see it as sexual or anything - it was school and we were learning ...and some kids have problems growing up ... it's not evil, it just that not everyone's brain works the same way. Treatment - not punishment.

      For what it's worth, I grew up very normal, somewhat shy with girls, happily married with kids and no desire to play with anyone who's not my own age.

      1. adnim

        @ version 1.0 Re: I consider

        Been there, I showed my dick to a six year old girl, I wanted to see what she had... I was eight not 47. This fscker has no excuse.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Dat sausage don' lie

    A sickness would be sending for the sake of it. Some wet Monday afternoon at three, the urge overwhelms you, off you go. Recipients at random.

    A kink would be sending because you like it. And, ahem, the wiener in the pics is doing its best to point that out. Fine, between consenting adults.

    A crim is sending to a child because you like it.

    Mr Wiener is a crim.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Dat sausage don' lie

      Funny thing sex. A very significant proportion of people lie and cheat to get it. It's almost as there's a really strong urge that makes people make excuses for their behavior.

      In Weiner's case the fact that he was sexting many women suggests that he's not particularly an ephebophile or hebephile, so the sex offenders register will be punishment enough and a bit of cognitive behaviorial therapy could be worth it for him.

  5. Bruce Ordway

    So sad

    Weiner looked like such a promising politician until... he didn't.

    I'm a little sick whenever I think of him now and all the people he damaged.

  6. Lars Silver badge
    Happy

    No response

    "Anthony Weiner's cock shots may be responsible for Donald Trump becoming president of the United States". This claim must annoy Farage immensely.

    1. Version 1.0 Silver badge

      Re: No response

      Maybe the Federal Judges will dismiss the case - everyone's already been punished enough.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'm afraid Hilary incompetently running her own email operation so she could scrub her official email at will is what caused her to lose. Weiner is just a symptom, someone who, like the Clinton's, assumed the rules were for the little people :-(

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      You mean the email just like her predecessor Gen. Colin Powel did, then told her how to set it up? There was never any problem with it, until retards like yourself grabbed onto it, and never let it go! So, private email setup for Conservative Token Black Man == A-okay, and private email setup for a liberal woman != A-okay? Must be hard to get new thoughts into your broken brain, "Rupert."

      Still, don't let that stop you from proclaiming an illegality where there is none, and that no legal action has taken place against it. So, what are you bitching about again? You sound like an idiot.

      Here's a tip, grow up, and stop playing the Conservative vs Liberal game. We in the US are living in a plutocracy, and if you can't figure THAT out, well, no wonder. You're stupid, like your comment, and probably like the jokes you pass off as "solutions" in a hole-in-the-wall pretending to be an IT shop. Douchebags are still playing that game. Get a clue, or stay one of them.

      1. Chris G

        "You mean the email just like her predecessor Gen. Colin Powel did, "

        Hilary! Is that you?

  8. Robert Moore
    Devil

    He forgot something important.

    He didn't mention anything about God or Jesus helping him to get through this.

    This is a major oversight.

    1. fidodogbreath

      Re: He forgot something important.

      He didn't mention anything about God or Jesus helping him to get through this.

      God, perhaps. Probably not Jesus, though, since Weiner is Jewish.

      1. Pompous Git Silver badge

        Re: He forgot something important.

        "Probably not Jesus, though, since Weiner is Jewish."
        Er... so was Jesus. And Jesus' weiner :-)

    2. MrDamage Silver badge

      Re: He forgot something important.

      No oversight, just forethought.

      He knew the field day the press would have if he said he felt the hand of god and was a changed man.

  9. fidodogbreath

    I came to grips [...] I hit bottom.

    So, business as usual, then.

  10. AegisPrime
    Facepalm

    As foretold on The Day Today :D

    God bless Chris Morris!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ioZZcjzmy-4

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Re: As foretold on The Day Today :D

    Chris Morris's satirical genius is sadly missed.

    1. Korev Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: As foretold on The Day Today :D

      It looks like there's a new Chris Morris film on the way.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The Butterfly Effect without the butter.

    Classic. Should have been the subhead.

  13. DagD

    coin toss

    Is it heads or tails? Everyone is so bloody ready to "forgive" Hillary for blatantly setting up shadow IT services, ignoring the warnings from the IT professionals tasked to protect Government secrets (which may have had the butterfly effect of oh, say Benghazi....)

    But omg, someone with some balls in his pants upset the establishment? Must have been Weiner's wiener... Can't have anything to do with Americans actually caring about the Country more than free handouts.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: coin toss

      I loathe Trump, but the fact that Clinton would have a guy like this so close to her inner circle speaks volumes about her ethics. It's not like this was a secret or anything.

      As usual, we'll hear endlessly about the realities of the crap emanating from the occupant of the Oval Office compared and contrasted with the fantasies about what would have happened if their opponent was elected, with extra heaping toppings of rainbows and unicorns.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: coin toss

        >but the fact that Clinton would have a guy like this so close to her inner circle

        Second that. I hate Trump and voted for Clinton (and her husband before) but I still blame her and the Dems for Trump more than I blame him or his party for basically doing what they have always done. I knew there was trouble when a few weeks before the election in one of the rare times I actually heard her discuss the issues what she was saying something I totally agreed with but I still had to turn off the radio because I just couldn't stand her and can't remember a human being in such a high profile role being less likable. Walter Mondale was at least fairly trustworthy.

        1. a_yank_lurker

          Re: coin toss

          @AC - Both Clintons have always seemed to me something the sewer threw up because it couldn't stomach either of them. They are nothing more the very rich Arkansas sub-trailer trash. Bill seemed to realize being a good ol' boy might get people to hold their noses long enough to vote for him. She seemed to have no clue how badly she stank and being abrasive ass did not help her. She managed to lose to Obama in 08 and Trump in 16; races the pundits said she should have won easily. That should be a clue about her and what many think of her.

          I refuse to vote for either slime and in Dem primary I voted for Sanders as a protest and I am not a Dem (the quirks of open primaries).

          1. itzman
            Paris Hilton

            Re: coin toss

            Why would anyone vote for a politician anyway?

            It just encourages them.

  14. The Nazz

    Would've made me laugh if the girl replied ...

    Now THAT is an excuse for a penis.

    nb i haven't, for once, read any above posts so apologies (and an upvote) if this has already been posted above.

  15. Winkypop Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Call Alex Jones

    Proof positive of the Jewish/lizard/pizza-gate conspiracy...

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Ha!

    Never heard that word until Matilda ... then started calling the dog's kennel a "chokey" ... Sammy and Didi - our Wiener dogs ..

  17. Dieter Haussmann

    According to Wikileaks emails and the official e-fits, he was the Podesta Brothers' lookout when kidnapping Maddy too.

  18. Peb

    Pizzagate?

    Isn't Weiner also responsible for helping drive the whole pizzagate thing? (On the grounds that if he's a bad apple then the whole barrel is bad)

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Pizzagate?

      Not as far as I recall. I followed the whole thing with amusement for a while and he didn't really feature in it. It was all centered on Podesta and a web have business associates and/or gay lovers around him.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hilary Clinton is racist and sexist

    Minorities and women's rights were nothing but talking points for her. She's worse than Trump but nobody cared. God bless Donald J. Trump.

  20. Antron Argaiv Silver badge
    FAIL

    Guys - we've covered this before

    No matter how handsome and impressive YOU think it is...

    ...the ladies do not want a picture of it. This is a scientific fact. They're just not wired that way. So, no dick pics, mmkay?

    1. aregross

      Re: Guys - we've covered this before

      Ding Ding Ding! We have a weiner!

      er, wait...

    2. Tom 38

      Re: Guys - we've covered this before

      Bet you also think the ladies don't fart or look at porn..

  21. Matt Bryant Silver badge
    WTF?

    "After stiffing us with Trump...."

    Whilst the continued fails of Mr Weiner do make good comedy, I would suggest the person ultimately to blame for Trump is Hillary Clinton. In letting Hillary dominate and dictate to the Democrat Party, the Dem leadership managed to snatch defeat from the jaws of electoral victory.

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