back to article BOAR-ZILLA stalks Fukushima's dead zone

Radioactive wild boars have become a problem in the evacuation zone around Japan's Fukushima nuclear plant. Reuters reports that as some of the towns near Fukushima re-open, those paving the way for returning residents often see boars strolling the streets. The newswire says some boars have even attacked humans, leading to …

  1. Adam 1

    Spider pig. Spider pig...

    1. Calleb III

      One pig = 8 rumps, sign me up

      Next to come Centipede pig

  2. seven of five

    Which is essentially the same thing which happened to (not only) bavarian boars since chernobyl[1]. Since they prefer eat mushroom (which are more contaminated than other plants) the boars became inedible, were hunted less and are now more numerous than before 1986. Unfortunately, they don´t glow in the dark and are therefore still difficult to hunt, causing a lot of damage to the countryside.

    [1] which is taken over by radioactive wolves - who still are regular size. It is a disappointment all around.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'd eat one but which mouth do you put the apple in?

    1. Simon Sharwood, Reg APAC Editor (Written by Reg staff)

      Well played

  4. IfYouInsist
    Coat

    Bohr-zilla?

    1. Simon Sharwood, Reg APAC Editor (Written by Reg staff)

      Also well played

  5. Eugene Crosser
    Alert

    "...picked up radiation doses that make them a very dangerous meal."

    Where is Lewis Page to challenge this claim?!

    (Yes I know he is not with The Reg anymore.)

    1. imanidiot Silver badge

      Re: "...picked up radiation doses that make them a very dangerous meal."

      ^this^

      I highly doubt the amount of radiation actually picked up is all that dangerous, but Japan has some of the strictest allowable radiation limits in the world. Some of it is seriously ridiculous.

      1. PNGuinn
        Mushroom

        Re: "...picked up radiation doses that make them a very dangerous meal."

        It would probably do all the Japanese a favour if someone could persuade them that their scheming greenie poilticos were dangerously radioactive...

        Tell them the proof is that they all glow black against a black background in pitch black darkness should do it ...

  6. Mystic Megabyte
    Mushroom

    Mutant daisies

    Don't eat these!

    http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/mutant-daisies-found-near-fukushima-nuclear-disaster-may-have-nothing-to-do-with-radiation-10411188.html

    1. Justin Pasher

      Re: Mutant daisies

      I guess you forgot the Joke Alert icon...

      http://www.snopes.com/nuclear-mutant-daisies/

  7. Winkypop Silver badge
    Coat

    I prefer dangerous seafood

    Maybe some Fukushasumi....

    1. Voland's right hand Silver badge

      Re: I prefer dangerous seafood

      You can pick that one from one well known Posh UK supermarket which continues to sell salmon caught downwind of Fukushima.

      1. Winkypop Silver badge

        Re: I prefer dangerous seafood

        Downwind?

        Flying fish?

        [joke]

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    Do you become some kind of Superboar is one of them bites you??

    And I wonder what could be the superpowers of a Superboar...

    1. hplasm
      Coat

      Re: Do you become some kind of Superboar is one of them bites you??

      "And I wonder what could be the superpowers of a Superboar..."

      They can talk the hind legs off an Arcrurian Megadonkey. Oh Boar, you say...?

      1. Kane
        Joke

        Re: Do you become some kind of Superboar is one of them bites you??

        "They can talk the hind legs off an Arcrurian1 Arcturan Megadonkey"

        Yes, but could they persuade them to go for a walk afterwards?

        1Sorry, couldn't help myself with the correction...

    2. Chemical Bob

      Re: Do you become some kind of Superboar is one of them bites you??

      No, you become a Super Bore and correct people in comment forums on the Internet.

      1. Kane
        Happy

        Re: Do you become some kind of Superboar is one of them bites you??

        "No, you become a Super Bore and correct people in comment forums on the Internet."

        Aww, Bob, it's just a bit of fun. Lighten up, it's Friday!

        Wait, unless...that was a joke? I've got to admit, when I start telling my wife how my day went, she tends to develop a slightly glassy look in her eyes and they drift ever so slowly to the left...

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    They havnt reached the BOSS at level 10 yet

    The one with all the special moves and atomic breath. These are just minions...

  10. wolfetone Silver badge

    A fairly boar-ing development. We demand 6 legged super-pigs the size of sky scrapers!

    1. seven of five

      and lasers!

      1. Kane
        Thumb Up

        "and lasers!"

        Shooting out of their eyes!

        1. wolfetone Silver badge

          And dropping napalm from their arses!

          THIS MUST BE DELIVERED!

          1. Pete4000uk

            All four of them!

    2. Mark 85

      They have them in Texas: https://www.outdoorhub.com/news/2017/03/08/bizarre-video-hunters-discover-spider-pig-8-legs/

  11. Zmodem

    All the mutants are in the pacific with a 1000 gallons of radioactive cooling water being put in everyday and will take another 40 years to fix, because they are to lames to make a heatsink reseviour and use chemicals instead

  12. Allonymous Coward
    Terminator

    I, for one, welcome our new swine overlords

    Can't believe I got in first. You lot are all for the (pork) chop when the boars take over.

  13. Tom Paine

    Boar

    Tangentially, I happened to encounter the wild boar someone released in the Forest of Dean back in 2004 very soon after they'd first been spotted, over a decade ago: a sow with 8 or 10 piglets. I watched them very carefully and cautiously as they foraged about in Forestry Commission land. They were drifting down a fairly steep wooded slope, and I was cautiously and quietly (I thought) following perhaps 10 yards downwind, enjoying a delusional sense that I was the new David Attenborough. They passed behind a tangle of undergrowth, piglets first, then the sow. When the sow emerged she stopped, turned, started me straight in the eyes and... well, you know that Dr Doolittle song about talking to the animals? This creature didn't know English but it communicated "if you don't push off, I'm gonna gut you like a fish with my tusks" pretty unmistakably. I took the hint and retreated!

    Really cool to see them in the wild, though, and in some places they're semi-habituated to humans (the Forest isn't all that unpopulated) so you can safely watch them from a distance as long as you don't startle them. (Keep dogs on a lead or, preferably, away from the woods altogether.) A charging boar is extremely dangerous and quite capable of killing a small dog and fucking up humans good and proper if you got a big one on a bad day.

    (In summary, visit the lovely Forest of Dean, we need to tourist money!)

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-gloucestershire-38755729

  14. Kevin Johnston

    But...

    do Fukushima Boar cutlets come ready cooked like Chicken Kiev did

    Yeah, OK...that really was stretching too far but both the good jokes had been used.

    1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: But...

      Chernobyl Chickens have mutated and now have four legs.

      How do they taste?

      Dunno, no ones ever caught one.

      I Fangyou, I'll be here all week.

  15. jake Silver badge

    Small-caliber rifle? For wild boar?

    I use 12 gauge slugs, and even then it sometimes takes more than a single shot ... Boars are physically difficult to kill. Small-caliber rounds just irritate the snot out of them.

    1. Brewster's Angle Grinder Silver badge

      Re: Small-caliber rifle? For wild boar?

      Okay, you have successfully proved your manhood.

      1. PNGuinn
        Windows

        Re: Small-caliber rifle? For wild boar?

        Okay, you have successfully lost your manhood.

        There - fify.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Small-caliber rifle? For wild boar?

      Some guys (mad, weightlifter types) in Melbourne, Australia go boar hunting with a single knife (each).

      One guy in particular I can think of. Does it fairly often, for the challenge. Hasn't gone badly for him yet, after a few years.

      Definitely not my kind of thing though.

    3. Zmodem

      Re: Small-caliber rifle? For wild boar?

      not man enough to use a knife like in the predator movie

    4. Eddy Ito

      Re: Small-caliber rifle? For wild boar?

      It's hard to say from the Reuters video what the caliber is but I will say it looks like a precharged pneumatic air rifle to me. Given the range and the fact that they are caged they could get by with as little as a .25 caliber with a neck shot. If I had to pick based on what little shows in the video I'd guess they're using an Evanix or Hatsan.

    5. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Small-caliber rifle? For wild boar?

      They can absorb a 12ga slug? Jebus, the non-mutated boar is freaky enough. That's a massive amount of stopping power. I wouldn't be too excited to get within shotgun range of one of those.

    6. Scroticus Canis

      Re: Small-caliber rifle? For wild boar?

      With you on that, Breneke by preference.

    7. Mark 85

      Re: Small-caliber rifle? For wild boar?

      Anything armor-piercing will work especially if you go for the headshot or one coming at you. Found that out hunting for them in flood plains of Memphis years ago.

    8. Eddy Ito

      Re: Small-caliber rifle? For wild boar?

      Better pictures here. Definitely using air rifles and the one in the second pic is almost certainly a Daystate.

  16. Dave 32
    Pint

    Self-cooking Bacon

    Yum! Need I say more?

    Dave

  17. Sporkinum

    Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

    Bebop. http://turtlepedia.wikia.com/wiki/Bebop_(1987_TV_series)

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Surely Hog-zilla would have been a better moniker?

    Or better still; Ham-era

    1. Simon Sharwood, Reg APAC Editor (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: Surely Hog-zilla would have been a better moniker?

      Well played. Why didn't I think of that? Don't tell the boss: I have a punning KPI and I don't think I'm going to hit it.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Headmaster

        Re: Surely Hog-zilla would have been a better moniker?

        You can use your moderator powers to delete my first post and name the hogs something that you yourself suddenly thought up.

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