back to article Lily Cole: You'd hate me more if Impossible.com were a success

Millionaire supermodel Lily Luahana Cole says we should be pleased that her taxpayer-funded vanity website Impossible.com doesn’t make any money. We’d hate it even more if it her Impossible.com were financially successful, she has told the Daily Telegraph in an interview. “I actually think if we were making loads of money, we …

  1. m0rt

    I don't hate you, Ms Cole. I just don't particularly like the comments you make justifying the existance of Impossible.com.

    However, I loathe the system that gave you taxpayer money.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Local Council Road Safety and Safe Routes in the Communities grants

      "However, I loathe the system that gave you taxpayer money"

      Still, best to qualify these things...

      Local councils apply for transport grants too, from Central Gov.

      On my commute, my local Council just got £100,000 that (somehow) was all spent putting in two 'egg shaped' speed reduction humps that can't be driven at the designated 30mph speed (are genuinely dangerous to hit at real world 35mph, Guidelines: 30+10%+2). Lorries now come to a virtual stop on the hill and as a consequence, frustrated car drivers now overtake on a blind bend heading uphill.

      The general state of the road surface either side of this Safety Measure are attrocious, cracks, broken surfaces, no white lines, but enter the grant zone and you have Dallas style white picket fences (which ironically, their height obscures the 30mph signs they are attempting to highlight)

      Talk about over design, that achieves diddly squat in the scheme of things.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Local Council Road Safety and Safe Routes in the Communities grants

        And to pour more fuel on the fire this new traffic measure probably has no twitter followers.

  2. AMBxx Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    Who is she?

    1. Dr_N

      An alien from the planet Quaxxann?

      1. Havin_it

        Quaequam blag! That is a downright grexnix slur-by-association upon Betelgeusian immigrants the length of the land! I suggest a prompt retraction, lest a Rigellian Hot-Shot be delivered with little warning!

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Personally, i'd be happier if it never existed and she had a half a clue as to why it was a stupid, wasteful idea in the first place.

    I can only think of one thing more pointless online, and now ive said that i'm struggling between the former MP known as Louise Mensch, and her narcissistic outburst better known as Menschn (or however she fell on the keyboard spelling it)

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Lily need not worry about haters

    -there is no chance of her site being a success

  5. Steve Crook

    She's redefined success...

    And made Orlowski part of her success story. The more criticism she receives the more successful she is. It fits in so well with Trolling and all the other internet hate memes, almost like mining bitcoin. Before long, she's going to be so successful that Facebook will probably buy her.

    She's a fool and I hate her. I'm also proud to be part of her success. Also, my head hurts.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's not even losing enough money to be a proper startup.

    1. DavCrav

      "It's not even losing enough money to be a proper startup."

      Maybe this is what the 'achieving scale' in the article means?

  7. Your alien overlord - fear me

    Can I go on impossible.com and get the money back? Or is that just impossible?

  8. Mage Silver badge
    Alert

    Not that bad...

    It's not like it's Google, Facebook etc

    Half a million and "Mostly harmless".

    Certainly a waste of taxpayers money, but down the back of sofa stuff compared to most government waste, sadly!

    WhatsApp, bought for $19B and going to steal privacy (for FB) from people that never signed up, because it has the contact data on the users phones.

    1. Synonymous Howard

      Re: Not that bad...

      I'd love UKgov (or anyone) to give me half a million because I would retire from paid work immediately and complete all those impossible things on my 'to do before I die' list.

  9. x 7

    Her nude photos are good if you ignore her head.

    If she sold decent quality versions online she'd probably make money. But I guess that's an impossible dream for her

    1. Charlie Clark Silver badge

      Never seen them but I reckon it's hard to get passed the deformed doll's head…

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Huh???

      Your standards must be different to mine.

      She is gorgeous.

  10. D Moss Esq

    Be thankful

    At least the NESTA money wasn't wasted on developing touch screen technology, for which there there would be no market even if it weren't Impossible.

  11. Crazy Operations Guy

    How much did she waste on that domain anme?

    I wonder how much taxpayer money was spent on such a stupid domain name...

  12. TheProf
    WTF?

    Wrong

    “I actually think if we were making loads of money, we’d be getting more criticism, you know,”

    Yes but it'd be a much nicer, whale hugging, vegan, green, recycling, whole earth synergistic type of criticism.

    And no one would be calling you and your money splashing pals 'tits'. Probably.

  13. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

    “I actually think if we were making loads of money, we’d be getting more criticism, you know,”

    For most people the amount she got from the taxpayers would be loads of money.

  14. wolfetone Silver badge

    I'm sure if I knew who she was, or cared more about her, I could possibly dislike her more. However, I don't know who she is, I don't care about her, so there is no value out of disliking her.

  15. Frumious Bandersnatch

    Weird, twisted Sir Humphrey logic

    Thinking in particular of the episode with the hospital with no patients. Obviously not a success by any normal person's standards. but in the fairytale land of civil service budgets and metrics, it's the most efficient hospital in the land.

    Come to think of it, I'm not even sure Sir Humphrey could get his enormous brain around Ms. Cole's logic.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    A waft of whalesong

    "“Our platform is maybe a challenge to things in capitalism, that is also the beauty of capitalism,” she adds, enigmatically."

    You could debate the meaning of this collection of words till Christmas and be none the wiser. The rest weren't a lot better.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    actually

    The idea is not entirely stupid.

    I have been approached by a number of possible clients over the last 4 or 5 years to make some kind of app that allows people to send thoughts, prayers, gift etc to other people who you may or may not know.

    This kind of thing is alien to me, if i like you enough i will actually make an effort, not use some website or app. Nevertheless, enough people do think like this and religion doesn't help. Just look at how many muppets click like and share on the picture of the kid with cancer.

    Having said all that, she was welcome to do exactly as she has done with a private investor and fail privately (like everyone else). The problem here was public money being wasted.

    People want to be nice to each other and send good wishes / help. But people don't want to pay to it.

    Its not a difficult concept to grasp and a little research beforehand might have given a hint at that.

    None of this is helped by the "sharing economy" .. where i share freely and a company sells it for profit. More people are wising up to that.

    Want to help someone;- visit that elderly neighbour, buy the big issue, sign greenpeace petitions...

  18. Pascal Monett Silver badge

    "I don’t think our success is based on whether we’re making money or not"

    You did not register the company managing Impossible.com as a non-profit, now did you?

    If the company is not a non-profit and it is not making money, it is a failure, period.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Eh?

    Surely to hate something you actually have to give a toss about it?

  20. mr_souter_Working

    also

    who the hell is she?

    never heard of her (but then, i doubt we attend the same functions)

    now, how do i go about getting the Government to give me a couple of hundred thousand - i have some ideas for websites that nobody will visit.......................

  21. mr_souter_Working

    how the hell are they losing THAT much money

    £250k per year - and there are 3 people employed

    what are they doing, burning 50's for heat????

    1. Synonymous Howard

      Re: how the hell are they losing THAT much money

      Toss a coin .. AWS or Azure?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: how the hell are they losing THAT much money

      Well, lets face it, when you include all the non-wage costs, that's not unreasonable. But since I'm fairly sure I've heard Lily bashing "fat cat bosses", I feel perfectly comfortable that the tables are turned. Bash away :-)

      1. x 7

        Re: how the hell are they losing THAT much money

        You can bash away as much as you like, but you won't get anything out of it

  22. armyknife

    Jobs for the Boys and Girls.

    So are the three employees paid minimum wage, just the national average or maybe just a little bit more?

  23. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

    Yes, but

    is it disruptive ?

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    According to estibot.com

    Impossible.com is worth $103,000. If we put in a change.org petition to get the site put on Flippa we can get back some of the money.

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon