back to article Fanbois iVaporate: Smallest Apple iPhone queues ever

iPhone fanbois have iVaporated: The Register has visited the same suburban Apple Store we always stalk visit on iPhone launch day and found just thirty people queueing. Apple has warned that this year it won't have lots of phones waiting for walk-in customers, which explains most of the shortfall. But that didn't deter people …

  1. Sgt_Oddball

    Stale apples?

    Even some of the most ardent fans of iPhones I know (including a friend who has a 6+ in pink rose gold....) are starting to get annoyed by what's increasingly feeling like 'me too' or change for the sake of arbitrary change.

    On the other hand, credit to Apple where credit is due once you buy an iphone, if you keep it well it really doesn't lose anywhere near as much value as pretty much every other phone so trading up isn't such a burden as you might think.

    I do however wonder just what posses people to queue for an electronic device though?

    1. goldcd

      What else can you queue up for any more?

      Your music is digital, your premiere tickets are booked online weeks in advance, your game pre-loads for the midnight unlock.

      I mean it's obviously fucked that you're sleeping in a fucking mall to get the chance to spend the best part of a grand on a phone, that's barely better than the last one, and millions will have within a few weeks based on a rolling contract plan second only in cost to your mortgage on an actual fucking house you live in..

      ..but you takes what you can, in this modern age.

      1. Kevin Fairhurst

        Re: What else can you queue up for any more?

        Your mortgage is £35 a month?? How old are you expecting to be when you retire? ;)

        1. enormous c word

          Re: What else can you queue up for any more?

          My mortgage is £37 /month - I feel ripped off now ;-)

        2. dbayly

          Re: What else can you queue up for any more?

          Your mortgage is £35 a month??

          It's for a phonebox

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: What else can you queue up for any more?

        I'd say the decreasing lines are because fewer and fewer people think it is any fun to wait in line when they can preorder what they want and have it shipped to them. It is really just the diehards who probably do it every year who are still out there participating in that silliness.

    2. Pompous Git Silver badge

      Re: Stale apples?

      trading up isn't such a burden as you might think.

      Trading up costs nothing chez Git. The Gitling gives us his cast-offs and they are rarely even 2 years old. He just gave me another Dell 27" because he just purchased a 4k curved screen monster jobbie, monitor so now I have two Dell 27" monitors. Life is good :-)

      1. Sgt_Oddball

        Re: Stale apples?

        Awww... I only have 3 22"er's....

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Stale apples?

      "On the other hand, credit to Apple where credit is due once you buy an iphone, if you keep it well it really doesn't lose anywhere near as much value as pretty much every other phone"

      Depreciation is often due mainly to market perception - look at car depreciation for an obvious example, where the rate may be 10% different for different versions of the same model.

      However, I have found that the way to get the lowest depreciation is just to buy popular Androids just before the new model is announced, when the fire sale of the old one is on. A year later, the price may have changed only slightly. If you don't mind lagging the latest technology by a year you can save a lot of money - and by the time you buy, the bugs have been sorted.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        depreciation

        I usually wait for the depreciation curve to level off. with cars , that means buying them for £400 at 12 years old.

        With phones , that means being given a used once Lumia535 with win10 on it cos the owner didnt like winphones.

    4. King Jack

      What posses people to queue for an electronic device?

      Stupidity.

  2. AlexS

    People have less money to waste.

    1. Sebastian A

      Most iFanBois have already been bled dry by yearly thousand-dollar phone upgrades.

      1. cali

        As opposed to who? iKnockoff fanboys who only dream of innovation, who couldn't afford an iPhone 5c case to save their lives?

        1. hplasm
          Gimp

          Fanboys who only dream of innovation

          Can't wait for the next iInnovation- the no-Screen iPhone.

          1. Vince

            Re: Fanboys who only dream of innovation

            What you mean the iPhone Shuffle?

            Sounds reasonable, I can hear Ive now "We believe in a truly screenless future. By removing the screen that everyone smashed anyway, we've been able to make the thinnest phone EVER"

          2. Trigonoceps occipitalis

            Re: Fanboys who only dream of innovation

            I had one of those once, made of Bakelite.

            (Made from the hooves of a Nuga.)

    2. cali

      Did you even read the article? iPhone 7 is sold out and breaking records.

      1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

        @cali

        Are you related to JJ Carter?

      2. d3vy

        "iPhone 7 is sold out"

        The fact that they "sell out" *every year* suggests apple are shit at planning and don't manufacture enough, or do it on purpose to get the free "iPhone stocks sell.out in 24hours" headlines.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          @d3vy - selling out every year

          No it does not mean they are "shit at planning", it means that the demand at first is far higher than it is the rest of the year. They can't have Foxconn build/staff manufacturing facilities sufficient to supply 5x as much for a month as what they do the rest of the time.

          They could start working on building them months earlier to build up a much larger launch inventory, I suppose, but there are a few problems with that. 1) it lengthens the time when details about them will leak, 2) it causes them to have to use older technology since it would need to be in a "final" state months earlier than it does now, 3) they'd still have to guess how many people are going to want to buy each combination of model, color and storage, and since they are further segmented by other stuff like the cellular chip used (at least in the US) that's yet another. If they ended up with a million extra rose gold 7 plus 128GB AT&T/T-mobile models, what the heck do they do with them?

          1. d3vy

            Re: @d3vy - selling out every year

            @Doug

            Fair point, however, Like I said, they do it every year. They have had plenty of time to address the issue of high demand at release. They know their products are popular, they know there is an increased demand at release date, they could rectify this, however I suspect that they dont want to.. because it causes hype, which potentially leads to more sales.

            If they even just changed the way that they did the release, instead of trying to be secretive and do a global launch they could easily announce the spec months in advance and take pre-orders (Bonus they will know up front how many they have sold up front).

            Added bonus, if they make the announcement when they finalise the spec and testing they would appear to be beating other manufacturers to market with some of the tech... rather than what happens now when the announce an iphone with new tech that samsung has been using for the last 6 months.

            To answer your question about the 1million surplus Rose Gold phones... Call them 7S and release them next year... :)

      3. Planty Bronze badge
        FAIL

        What records, lowest number of phones produced prior to launch to ensure a sell-out?

        What idiot believes that manufactured hype?

      4. Vince

        "Sold out"

        ...well if you make a stupidly low number, but have something stupidly popular that isn't tricky.

        "Breaking Records"

        ...for? Given no sales data is being released.

  3. JeffyPoooh
    Pint

    Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

    Maybe the concept of a phone requiring an adapter to connect headphones or earphones is just a bit too blatantly stupid.

    What next? The iPhone 8 will require an eyeball adapter so that you can see the screen?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

      Someone already worked out that you can remove the polarizer from an LCD and put one on your glasses so the screen looks white to everyone else and normal to you (and anyone who carries around polarizing filters just in case). But if it were some variety of OLED instead, that's a non-starter. Anyway, as photons were always trendy enough to be wireless, perhaps the screens are safe for now.

      1. Tchou
        Holmes

        Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

        "photons were always trendy enough to be wireless"

        Sound is wireless too, and that's why humans wanted to bound it to one ears only so the others around don't hear.

        Just sayin'.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Sound is wireless

          true, true. TBH there's no wireless thing between a phone/cpu/whatever and the actual photon emitters to match headphones, well unless they come up with stereo-optic Apple iFaceHugger that uses HDMI-over-Bluetooth then God help us.

    2. Pompous Git Silver badge

      Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

      What next? The iPhone 8 will require an eyeball adapter so that you can see the screen?

      Already got one. It's called a magnifying glass and I need it for any smartphone. Never owned or used an iPhone.

    3. cali

      Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

      Yeah Apple was stupid for removing the mobile keyboard and flobby disk drive!!!! Stupid most successful company in history!!!!!123

      1. MiguelC Silver badge

        Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

        Oooh yes, I still remenber my old mobile phone with its 8 inch floppy disk drive...

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

        I see the Apple haters are out in force today (as usual).

        I wonder if they are Note 7 users suffering from withdrawal.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

          I see the Apple Haters are well and truly out in force today.

          Sure is entertaining.

          It don't matter to me as I use an old Motorola dumb phone. No reason to get a so called smart phone.

        2. Templogin

          Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

          Note 7, the phone for people who can't afford iPhones, but can afford fire extinguishers.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

            "Can't afford iPhones".

            Are people still using that old chestnut and still thinking that owning an iPhone someone elevates you to the higher echelons of society and that it is out of reach of mortal man? You're wrong.

            As well as the "rich", every man, dog, kid, student, drug dealer & tramp has one too. Paying £25 a month as part of your phone contract isn't indicative of wealth, no matter how much you'd like to think it is.

      3. IsJustabloke
        Trollface

        Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

        @cali

        Don't you hate that when it happens.... there you are happily hammering away at the "!" key when your finger slips and you finish with a bunch of random letters/numbers.

        Still it does add a touch of the "frothing at the mouth" to your contribution... so kudos.

      4. Yugguy

        Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

        Flobby disk drive? Were Bill and Ben actually pioneers in portable storage?

      5. Vince

        Re: Maybe some people already own nice headphones or earphones...

        Sigh.

        So the reason this floppy drive thing isn't relevant is because that was a dying standard. The disks couldn't hold enough data, were painfully slow and so on.

        The headphone jack, apart from needing some space is ubiquitous, easy, cheap and importantly doesn't require licensing from Apple to create accessories. It would have of course taken "courage" to make that no longer require a license and make it a free option so everyone could move to a different connector and standard without paying Apple for the right.

  4. Youngone Silver badge

    Hardly Scientific

    My wife's friends are the iPhone target market, and up until this year they all owned one.

    I noticed a few weeks ago when a group of us went out that my wife is the only one still using one.

    The rest of them had a Samsung of one kind or another.

    I don't know the reason, but it won't be because of the price.

    1. Dan 55 Silver badge

      Re: Hardly Scientific

      It adds an extra bit of excitement ti their daily routine, never knowing when it's going to go up in smoke?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Hardly Scientific

      Ahem, obviously they are not the target market ;)

    3. cali

      Re: Hardly Scientific

      iPhone doesn't have a target market. This is as stupid as saying Coca Cola has a target market.

      1. Kane

        Re: Hardly Scientific

        iWut?

      2. John Bailey

        Re: Hardly Scientific

        "iPhone doesn't have a target market. This is as stupid as saying Coca Cola has a target market."

        So not in fact, stupid at all.

      3. Tchou
        Paris Hilton

        Re: Hardly Scientific

        "This is as stupid as saying Coca Cola has a target market."

        Well I have some bad news for you : you're most probably in Coca-Cola target market and it isn't exactly shiny

      4. hplasm
        Gimp

        Re: Hardly Scientific

        "iPhone doesn't have a target market...."

        Probably the same as Coca Cola's, McD's, Disney etc.

        Bored twits with too much spare cash.

        BTW- you have spittle on your iPhone 7. Best to queue up for a new one...

      5. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Hardly Scientific

        iPhone doesn't have a target market.

        No? Then how comes that only (stupid) people with too much money on their hands buy them? Owning an IPhone is a status symbol, especially among younger people. You know, like assholes buying BMW, older men buying Porsche and so on.

  5. whoseyourdaddy

    Why burn vacation days when I can have it delivered to my doorstep?

    Or, more importantly, why pay a premium on Ebay to someone who stood in line?

    1. Winkypop Silver badge
      Devil

      Vacation days..?

      LOL

      This is Australia, we take 'sickies' for this type of lark.

      1. Pompous Git Silver badge

        Re: Vacation days..?

        Downside to retirement: no sickies! :-(

        1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

          Re: Vacation days..?

          "Downside to retirement: no sickies!"

          Even bigger downside. Sickies are real!

      2. MrDamage Silver badge

        Re: Vacation days..?

        > "LOL

        This is Australia, we take 'sickies' for this type of lark."

        And we often put more work into chucking the sickie, than we would have put into work had we attended.

        Best I've done is start the prep work for the sickie a week and a half before the day I wanted to take off.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Vacation days..?

          My best:

          Took a sickie to go skiing for the day.

          Took a tumble on the slopes and got concussed.

          Went to medical centre.

          Got a certificate from Dr.

          Used it to cover sickie....

  6. Jemma

    To paraphrase Futurama 603

    "Not quite so dumb Bastards... "

    I'm still predicting Apple will end up working from a lockup in Luton - hopefully this is where it begins..

    As for the no headphone jack garbage, someone said that because it'd been used for almost a century it was useless and needed to be replaced - nope, it's lasted so long because it was the right tool for the right job. It's like the idiots who killed the Landrover 90/110 Defender with the dubious "we couldn't find a clean engine anywhere that would fit.. " (in an engine bay the size of a small shed, yeah right, the only reason someone hasn't fitted a Rolls Royce Merlin is because it's terrifying (on road) with 100hp, let alone 1000); it stayed almost identical since 1948 because it was perfect for its function, and still is, but it's not new shiny, it's more than 2 years old, so it's gotta go..

    Apple Syndrome has started to spread, shame you can't make it a notifiable disease like foot & mouth. All managers infected could be culled - symptoms include an emotional age of about 14, a deranged addiction to removing useful features, and an attention span measured in seconds. I'd suggest the managers who signed off the new Landrover Discovery & iPhone should be the first test case.

    Best of all, managers aren't cute like badgers, so there'll be no fuss.

    1. PNGuinn
      Trollface

      Re: To paraphrase Futurama 603

      "I'm still predicting Apple will end up working from a lockup in Luton - hopefully this is where it begins.."

      Or Slough.

      Come, friendly Samsungs, and fall on Slough ...

      1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

        Re: To paraphrase Futurama 603

        Come, friendly Samsungs, and fall on Slough

        That's better. Gotta make it scan.

  7. Badbob

    Trading up?

    So, if you can tolerate an upgrade every second year, it's pretty much cost neutral. I usually get the 'S' model as it tends to be more reliable with the bugs ironed out.

    Last year, I got a 6S delivered to my home, on launch day, for £100 on a £30 24mo contract, I then traded in my 5S for £150. If you discount the contract price, which I would still have to pay even if the phone was a box of crap, I was £50 up on the deal.

    I really like my Apple gadgets, but I can't bring myself to spend £700 every second year for an out of contract upgrade.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Trading up?

      Up on the deal? wut?

      You paid £720 over 2 years or doesn't any of that count towards your iphone?

    2. DRue2514

      Re: Trading up?

      £30 per month is over £700 in 2 years. I pay much, much less than that per month and pay for a phone upfront. But I agree with you, I wouldn't pay £700 for a new phone either.

    3. Vince

      Re: Trading up?

      Although the odds are you could be on a SIM Only deal which is significantly less than £30, so actually your savings are incorrectly calculated.

    4. John Bailey

      Re: Trading up?

      "Last year, I got a 6S delivered to my home, on launch day, for £100 on a £30 24mo contract, I then traded in my 5S for £150. If you discount the contract price, which I would still have to pay even if the phone was a box of crap, I was £50 up on the deal."

      Are you by any chance, one of Apple's accountants?

  8. jaffa99

    "Steven, who asked us not to use his surname" - but let you use his picture - lol.

  9. macjules

    Let me guess

    "Steven, who asked us not to use his surname …"

    Would it by any chance have been changed by deed poll to 'Jobs' or 'Wozniak'?

  10. cali

    "Fanboys". Journalism is dead.

    1. JudeKay (Written by Reg staff)

      One day we'll grow up and be the kind of journalissss ... zzzzz I'm sorry, I fell asleep there for a moment.

      1. A. Coatsworth Silver badge
        Trollface

        I'll have to side with cali on this one: Early this year you promised us that you would focus on boring, by the numbers journalism like the one we could read literally anywhere else on the internet.

        Sadly that ended being an empty promise, and instead El Reg is still full of funny shenanigans, out-of-the-box articles, absurd bootnotes, and name calling. It is like The Register would want to bite the hand that feeds it!

        And so, poor souls like cali must endure this kind of articles, must keep visiting the site to read the infuriating notes, must create and maintain an account in order to complain about all these problems!

        This is an utterly unacceptable situation!

    2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      You really are related to JJ Carter aren't you?

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    maybe its a 'Trek' thing?

    y'know......odd numbered films aren't as good as even numbered ones? I'm sure its just a blip and that they'll all be back in 3 months time for the iPhone 8.

    1. Jeffrey Nonken

      Re: maybe its a 'Trek' thing?

      ...a myth that's been THOROUGHLY debunked, BTW. But let's not bring logic into this.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Time to pay for queue stooges?

    Microsoft been doing that for years. The Xbox360 launch queues in most major cities for mostly paid stooges (employees + some cash). Cheap way to build hype.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Time to pay for queue stooges?

      I've honestly never seen a queue to get an Xbox 360 so stop your lies!

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Time to pay for queue stooges?

        I was paid to attend the Xbox360 launch, the Halo4 launch (I got to keep the game on that occasion, as well as being paid), and also the Xbox One London launch events. All I had to do was pretend to be an excited gamer, not a Microsoft employee, intern. The vast majority of people in the line with me we also work colleges.

        1. macjules

          Re: Time to pay for queue stooges?

          I guess you must have spent the weeks leading up the launch working hard on that chest press, given how bloody heavy the Xbox was.

  13. Lotaresco
    Trollface

    <Shrug>

    I use, and prefer, iPhones to the flawed Android phones.

    I don't feel the need to stand in a queue all night to get a phone, never have and never will.

    Similarly I quite like Science Fiction in general, Star Trek, Marvel comics, Terry Pratchett books and Tolkien.

    I have never felt the need to dress up as an Orc, Elf, Wizard, Goblin, Klingon or "Steampunk[1]" character, because that's what idiots do. It strikes me that the set of "queues up all night for a phone" and "adult who dresses up like a four year old at a sleepover" are overlapping sets.

    [1] This seems to mean wear a hat and attach some goggles to the hat on the grounds that there was nothing else available to make someone look like a fool.

    1. hplasm
      Gimp

      Re: <Shrug>

      "I use, and prefer, iPhones.."

      So you already look like a fool? Saves time I suppose.

    2. Jeffrey Nonken

      Re: <Shrug>

      Wow. Opinionated, arrogant AND judgemental. Nicely done.

      BTW, while I happen to like iPhones, I'm neither fool nor idiot enough to think they're perfect.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: <Shrug>

      So people who dress up as characters are idiots?

      The last con I was at, of the 20 friends I met up with there all had at least a degree (in various engineering and science subjects) and there were at least four PhDs amongst our numbers - all very happy to be attired as various superheroes, game and novel characters - a very solid and non-idiotic bunch.

      It amuses me that Cosplayers are seen as idiots - but people dressed in football shirts who can barely climb a flight of stairs are seen as perfectly reasonable types...

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I am sure Apple will sell an awful lot of these.

    The long term issue is that hardware is getting cheaper and so the perceived benefit between buying, say, a OnePlus 3 and the top of the range iPhone at over twice the price gets smaller and smaller, other than the "prestige" benefit, and the bigger sales, the lower the prestige factor (which is why car makers have to have different brands). Featuritis and marketing get more and more important. Unlike cars, where a £40k car can really be a lot faster and more comfortable than a £20k one, human eyes and ears can discriminate only so much, and we're pretty much up against those limits already. When the USP becomes a bigger vibrator with a fancy name, and removing a port to fit it in is "courage",a barrel is being scraped. Perhaps the time has come to retire some of the decision makers in Cupertino.

  15. BebopWeBop

    It is this dedication to reporting on Apple

    The Register visits the Broadway store whenever possible because Australia's advanced time zone means the nation's Apple Stores open earlier than any other on the globe.

    That makes the Reg's reporting such an essential read :-)

  16. Prst. V.Jeltz Silver badge
    Joke

    Apple Staff displayed none of the circular hugging and bonding rituals we've seen in past years

    All this article needs now is a voice over by David Attenborough.....

    1. Jemma

      Re: Attenborough

      Hopefully professional grade TV cameras being jammed through bedroom windows will put the fanbois/girls off mating. Having a 90 year old dangling from a rappelling line giving a "blow by blow" account in a plummy accent would probably put most people off, still it could be worse, it could be Chris Packham.. He always reminds me of the monkey dust pilot sketch.

      Still playing hunt the fanboi is a damn sight safer than playing chicken with Asian honeybees - there isn't enough money on the planet to make me go anywhere near those. I'd feel safer using a Taipan as a scarf.

      Long may Sir David continue.

  17. Yugguy

    I know Steven's surname!

    It's MUG.

  18. hi_robb

    Hmm

    Apple fans have a smaller iQueue than normal then?

    1. Yugguy

      Re: Hmm

      Have a BADUMTISH!!

    2. This post has been deleted by its author

      1. Sandtitz Silver badge
        Mushroom

        Re: Hmm @Voyna i Mor

        "Apple fans do have above average IQs on the whole. The correlation between income and IQ is quite high, and Apple buyers tend - again on average - to have higher incomes than Android buyers, because the average Android EUSP is probably about 60% that of the average iPhone (taken as a whole) and can be afforded by more people."

        That's silly.

        I think there is correlation between IQ and income to some degree, but there is a correlation between income and shrewdness as well. Perhaps most iPhone owners were schoolground/workplace bullies?

        Another take would be that iWatch buyers have above average (>100) IQs, but people who buy Patek Philippes or Richard Mille watches (with tourbillons) are probably the smartest people on this planet. Likewise Vertu owners are probably more intelligent than your regular puny iPhone fans.

        For the record: yes, I could buy the whole Apple experience all the way to wazoo but I'm still satisfied with my Lumia and really can't be bothered - perhaps due to my low IQ.

    3. hplasm
      Pint

      Re: Hmm

      Have an Internet! COTW!

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Waiting for all the haters

    Who think "this time, Apple really is going to suffer" to be disappointed once again when Apple reports their sales the next few quarter and they see that while the iPhone 6 was a sales peak they'll never match due to some obvious factors, that iPhone sales do not keep falling and falling. Especially because of stupid stuff that most people don't care about, like a headphone jack.

  20. TVU Silver badge

    Fanbois iVaporate: Smallest Apple iPhone queues ever

    The headphone jack might be part of the issue but I suspect the greater part is general market saturation in developed countries.

  21. David Roberts
    Facepalm

    Australia.....what about NZ?

    Auckland has an Apple store which is closer to the rising sun than Sydney by some hours.

    Oops! Beaten by the Kiwis again.

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Lies...

    Apple says they left out the headphone socket...

    Due to lack of room within the iPhone 7. But they also left it out of the huge iPhone 7 Plus?

    Due to waterproofing. But they can waterproof the Lightning connector, the mic, the speaker, the buttons, etc., etc.

    Liars. Bald faced liars. Not even good lies.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Perfection requires Patience

    See Title

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