back to article Ancient Brits 'set wealthy man's FANCY CHARIOT on FIRE' – boffins

Archaeologists digging in Leicestershire say they have discovered the remains of a prestige-marque chariot dating from the second or third century BC, which had seemingly been torched on purpose by local inhabitants. The most prestigious badge in Iron Age British chariots According to a statement released by Leicester uni …

  1. Omgwtfbbqtime

    ...would have belonged to a high-status individual, such as a “noble” or “warrior”

    Sure it wasn't a dodgy spear sales rep? That would explain setting fire to it.

  2. Ross K Silver badge
  3. Neil Barnes Silver badge
    Boffin

    When archeologists aren't quite sure

    It's always 'a ritual object'...

    1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge

      Re: When archeologists aren't quite sure

      Very true. In the "Cave of the Shaman" in southern France there are many carvings on the wall depicting women with exagerated figures (T & A), and a man (definitely a man, no chance to mistake him for a woman, especially in braille, as Terry Pratchett might put it) with a HUGE erection. The local guide explaied this probably had to do with fertility rituals. She was not amused by my alternative theory that this might have been the local communal men's room, and these were just the usual graffiti you might expect from adolescent men (of all ages).

      The burnt chariot might have belonged to a much hated landlord

      1. Fun Fun

        Re: When archeologists aren't quite sure

        I totally agree with your theory about Ts, As and big erectile Ps in stone age mens rooms.

        The same goes for the FAT "Venus" statues.

        Imagine a stone age community. In the community there is this big girl that enjoys an appetite worth three adult men and her appetite is a small embarrasment to the whole community.

        For me it seems much more convincing that the community potter has made the clay Venuses for a secret amusement to the stone age garage, mentioned above.

    2. Hollerith 1

      Re: When archeologists aren't quite sure

      There was a reconstructed Iron Age village where people lived, and one day a visiting archaeologist came, saw a shallow pit just inside the entrance, and was dumbfounded that it was there -- they had assumed these depressions were of religious significance. The people recreating village life said 'oh, that's where the chickens roll when they come in out of the rain.

      In short, a chicken wallow.

      I have been skeptical of 'religious significance' or 'ritual object' ever since.

    3. Fink-Nottle
      Headmaster

      Re: When archeologists aren't quite sure

      ... so it belonged to the Man from the Monastery?

      Next best thing to a Jim the Great icon -->

      1. graeme leggett Silver badge

        Re: When archeologists aren't quite sure

        Stop messing about! You're having a navy Lark.

        It's quite obviously an ancient warlord's Bentley. Perhaps he discarded it due to some problem with the mechanism (Binding of the axle after ending up In The Marsh) Or to prevent it falling into his rivals hands - not wanting them to Take It From tHere

  4. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
    Joke

    Top Gear iron age? Intruiging

    so was this the iron age Stig's helmet?

    1. Allan George Dyer
      Joke

      Re: Top Gear iron age? Intruiging

      "Some say he slayed Grendal and nail his arm above the door"

      Boewulf was his intro-speil?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Top Gear iron age? Intruiging

        >"slayed"

        SLEW! THE PAST TENSE OF 'to slay" IS SLEW!

        AAAAARRRGGGGGHHHHHH

        PS: Are you from leftpondia? Most of the people I've read with tense-blindness appear to be so. Either that or pre-school..

  5. Efros

    Top Gear Albion

    With no doubt Jezza managing to piss off the locals by allusions to the way the Celts had usurped the Picts, presumably with appropriately accidentally selected number plates on show.

  6. Christoph

    More proof of terrorist attacks! The Police must have greater powers to control these incidents!

  7. Pete 2 Silver badge

    The future awaits

    > The chariot bits were found buried amid a pile of "burnt cinder and slag"

    Archaeologists in 3000 A.D. will, most likely, say the same thing about Teslas

    Maybe the horses towing this jalopy suffered a particularly powerful "backfire" just as the driver was lighting up?

  8. Crazy Operations Guy

    "It is a once-in-a-career discovery,” enthuses Dr Jeremy Taylor, Leicester uni archaeologist.

    Holy crap, that is depressing...

  9. Ralph B

    Shouldn't Worry

    You can still buy the exact same model from the Morgan Motor Company.

    1. Inventor of the Marmite Laser Silver badge

      Re: Shouldn't Worry

      lovely - I WANT ONE

  10. Elmer Phud

    That reminds me . . .

    ... years ago when bits of Kings Cross still had poor people in council flats, I spotted a 'new' Porche that had been parked outside a block of flats.

    Some kind soul had done a custom paint job by apparently walking from one end of the car to the other - on the top of the car - and doing a Jackson Pollock on the way.

    When the locals can only afford a beat-up Astra, don't take the piss.

  11. Daniel D

    Or maybe it was a sacrifice? Hardly prehistoric in any case...

  12. imanidiot Silver badge

    nothing ever changes

    So maybe, like todays supercars it just spontaniously combusted.

  13. Bucky 2

    Old News

    I was watching a documentary called "The Hunger Games: Catching Fire," and this very ritual was depicted.

    Seems like old news to me.

  14. Gazman

    A miracle of survival

    I'm sure that it was torched.

    One time I drove through Leicester (on the Fosse Way, previously an Iron Age trackway) and the thing that astonished me was a crowd of teenagers standing on top of a car in a park while chanting and pointing at another car they had set on fire.

    So, clearly, the ritual has survived in Leicester folk memory.

    1. ian 22
      Flame

      Re: A miracle of survival

      So class envy is an ancient religion?

      Yes, I too worship at the altar of the burning Porsche.

  15. Slow Joe Crow

    Are they sure it wasn't done by Gauls?

    It may just be the bias in my news sources but I associate torching cars with Parisian Banlieus, but they may have learned it from ancient Chavs.

  16. Grikath
    Mushroom

    You can't take it with you...

    they said to the Hero.

    "We'll see about that..." he replied, and dropped the torch with his final breath .

  17. JustWondering
    Thumb Down

    Once in a lifetime discovery?

    Nice try. Now get back to work lazybones.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Still in the Iron Age

    nice wheels dude

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This is England ...

    The chariot was uninsured and crushers hadn't been invented.

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