back to article Queen's Speech: Computer Misuse Act to be amended, tougher sentences planned

The final session of Parliament before next year's General Election was opened by the Queen today, who told MPs and peers that the Tory-led coalition government had 15 bills tabled. There was little of note on the tech front, with two exceptions – both detailed within the Serious Crime Bill. The first is that plans are afoot …

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  1. Stuart 22

    Fiddling with fiddlers while London turns (into an exclusive haven for the robber barons)

    And I guess the British Museum had better check out its ancient Greek library pretty fast.

  2. Suricou Raven

    I sense ambiguously worded laws on the way!

    1. MrXavia

      Ambiguously worded laws with strict liability to be sure....

      The government loves to find ways to make people criminals, even if they are doing nothing to harm anyone...

    2. John Smith 19 Gold badge
      Childcatcher

      Yet Another TOTC law. I sense the hand of Ms Perry

      Yet again.

      I feel a short public information film coming on

  3. Pete 2 Silver badge

    Pro or con?

    > sentences for attacks on computer systems fully reflect the damage they cause

    How about requiring some of the responsibility for insecure and badly designed systems to fall on the heads of the people who design or (mis)manage them? One of the properties of being a "professional" person is taking responsibility for the quality of your work (on the basis that it is specialised and therefore beyond the grasp of "ordinary folk" to understand or critique) and that you have a duty of care towards those who place their trust in your services.

    Maybe if people who's designs were so flawed - or who cut out every failsafe, oversight, procedural check or protection mechanism for reasons of cost or stupidity - that they amounted to criminal negligence were held to account there would be at least a start to getting some half-decent, secure software. What we have at the moment is like blaming the woodworms when your house falls down.

    1. adnim

      Re: Pro or con?

      I agree with you. However, many computer hackers/script kiddies/metasploit users want to make money for themselves and don't pay tax.

      Incompetent coders, careless sys admins and sloppily run IT companies usually (tax loop holes aside) pay tax.

      The old maxim... "don't bite the hand that feeds you".

      1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
        Facepalm

        Re: Pro or con?

        and don't pay tax

        That's a new one.

        Paying taxes is positively correlated with product quality,

        I guess in a Picketty world, we would be blinded by the light coming out of the floppy disk slots.

    2. Daggerchild Silver badge
      Big Brother

      Re: Pro or con?

      > sentences for attacks on computer systems fully reflect the damage they cause

      Oh great - damage or 'damage'? - never mind, rhetorical question.

      So someone walks past a defective defence and the owners poop themselves, call in consultants, wipe servers, damage databases, and otherwise slapstick fall over their own feet in panic and *those* will be the 'damages' that the 'hacker' pays for then.

      Your crime is exposing incompetance. Your sentence will be proportional to the magnitude of the incompetance exposed.

    3. Steve Evans

      Re: Pro or con?

      Let's hope they don't take the word of the "victim" for the cost...

      The cost of the damage should purely be the loss of business if a system is taken offline by the attack (NOT afterwards when they patch the flaw in a panic) and the real damage to systems or data.

      NOT the price or inconvenience of fixing the flaw which they shouldn't have left in the first place, nor the damage their reputation suffers from being made to look stupid for hosting their services on windows 98.

    4. phuzz Silver badge

      Re: Pro or con?

      I do agree with the above posters, that perhaps there should be some penalties for bad security, but it's worth noting that if someone physically breaks into a house, the homeowner is not penalised by the law for leaving the door unlocked, although their insurance firm is likely to be less happy.

  4. Will Godfrey Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Shark Jumped!

    Who gets to decide the value of the damage supposedly done to a 'computer system'?

    WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

    This lot won't just have loopholes, there will be voids the size of the grand canyon!

    1. Sir Gaz of Laz

      Re: Shark Jumped!

      'WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?'

      I don't know, but I'd suggest you don't Google* that...

      *other search engines are available

      1. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

        Re: Shark Jumped!

        'Paedophilic Manuals' - Copies of the Sun and the Daily Heil's 'Sidebar of Shame' with their 'look who's now legal' stories? Copies of 'Lolita'? The film 'Leon'? Any history text that covers the last 500 years? (hint: how old were the wives of Henery VIII?) Wikipedia?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Shark Jumped!

          Anything the government and police don't want you to have I would assume - as I suspect they don't really exist, but you can't find out without the risk of accidental coming into possession of one (or the suspicion of possession)

          Though I assume the normal one, used by most paedophiles goes like this

          "Find partner"

          "Produce child"

          "abuse child"

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Shark Jumped!

          "Any history text that covers the last 500 years? (hint: how old were the wives of Henery VIII?) Wikipedia?"

          When they married him they were: 24, 32, 28, 25,19, 31.

          What is your point??

          1. The First Dave

            Re: Shark Jumped!

            How about Romeo and Juliette then?

          2. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

            Re: Shark Jumped!

            "Any history text that covers the last 500 years? (hint: how old were the wives of Henery VIII?) Wikipedia?"

            When they married him they were: 24, 32, 28, 25,19, 31.

            What is your point??

            The operative word there are 'when they married him'.

            Catherine of Aragon, for example, was betrothed to Henry's brother Arthur at the age of three, and married at fifteen. Henry VII may not have been the best choice for this example, but you don't have to spend long looking at English history to find that marriages to girls in their early teens was fairly common and considered 'normal'. By today's standards, this is far from acceptable, but this serves only as an illustration that attitudes, and moral norms, change over time, as they do across cultures. The fact that the rise of Christianity in the British Isles also led to a reduction in the rights of women, and the tendency to view them as property didn't help either.

            That was my point.

      2. Christoph

        Re: Shark Jumped!

        Books of photographs by Lewis Carroll (which I saw openly for sale in a Fleet Street bookshop in the 80's)

        The diaries of a notorious criminal who sold 9 year old girls as sex slaves while committing genocide as a side line. And perhaps they could also imprison anyone who celebrates him on Columbus Day?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Shark Jumped!

          When you word the law as loosely as parliament does, the one thing that is a virtual certainty is that the first prosecution for a "paedophilic manual" will have not the slightest connection with kiddy fiddling.

    2. Tom_

      Re: Shark Jumped!

      WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

      They're the things that used to be called family photo albums.

      1. Tom 35

        Re: Shark Jumped!

        "They're the things that used to be called family photo albums"

        Department store catalogues?

      2. 's water music

        Re: Shark Jumped!

        >> WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

        > They're the things that used to be called family photo albums.

        I dunno, I was assuming that possession of paedophilic manuals was going to be something along the lines of The Hands of Orlac but where Vasseur is a charlie chester. Seems a bit harsh to do porridge for it though.

        1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge
          Coat

          Re: 'paedophilic manuals'

          Well, I shall certainly be keeping a close eye on all my manuals, and any that show paedophilic tendencies will be severely disciplined.

    3. rh587

      Re: Shark Jumped!

      The BBC have used the wording "written paedophilia".

      So better burn those copies of Lolita now. Surely written paedophilia (assuming it is entirely fictional) is the very definition of a victimless crime, however distasteful it may be. In any case, the Head of the British Library can look forward to a lengthy stretch inside unless they burn a sizeable chunk of their Victorian literature.

      Seems like just the sort of laws the Police love - it can mean pretty much whatever they want it to mean, giving grounds for arrest and thus grounds to search for "other evidence". In other words, a charter to go fishing.

      1. Steve Evans

        Re: Shark Jumped!

        I'm sure there are incident reports in the Vatican which would qualify as written paedophilia.

    4. John Riddoch

      Re: Shark Jumped!

      Seems to be actually mean child grooming for dummies

      I'm not sure that banning them is right as it's verging on legislating "thought crimes", although I can see the reasoning for it. There's certainly a case for having some of that information to safeguard children ("Spotting child grooming for dummies?").

    5. Irongut

      Re: Shark Jumped!

      "WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?"

      Books or magazines that tell you how to get better photos of children?

    6. Crisp

      Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

      I've no idea. It seems a little silly to me to have a law to cover a specific case of a manual that details how to commit a very specific crime.

      Why no legislation on burglary manuals? Or Murder manuals? Armed robbery manuals? (Maybe it's the programmer in me, but why not create an abstract law regarding the dissemination of criminal techniques in manuals and then have a concrete implementation for each crime?)

      Is this law really going to accomplish anything? I'm no criminal mastermind, but I don't think that criminals go on to the internet, download a "paedophilic manual" and then start practising.

      1. Nick Ryan Silver badge

        Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

        Why no legislation on burglary manuals? Or Murder manuals? Armed robbery manuals? (Maybe it's the programmer in me, but why not create an abstract law regarding the dissemination of criminal techniques in manuals and then have a concrete implementation for each crime?)

        Because that would be sensible and would not pander to the idiots / daily mail readers / voters (delete as applicable). A sane lawyer, yes, I couldn't believe one still existed, recently stated that having more and more specific laws was a bad thing. Unless you are a lawyer. And guess what's the background of a lot of the top MPs...

        There were also some statistics about the number of new laws introduced recently compared to historically. The rise is phenomenal, and it's not because there are a great many new or novel crimes being committed. Creating new laws is very different to enforcing them.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

          Didn't Mohammed shack up with an 8-year-old in the Quran? This ought to be interesting. 'Spect there's something comparable in many religious texts.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

            He married Aisha when she was 6, and the marriage was consummated when she was 9. He was 53.

            How he could be a role model is beyond me.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

              You'd have to then include some of the writings of Ayatollah Khomeini; based on Aisha, his rulings got pretty explicit in detailing exactly what you're allowed to get up to in the sack with a six year old.

        2. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

          Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

          Why no legislation on burglary manuals?

          ...

          Because that would be sensible

          No it would not, it would be equally poorly thought out. Unless you want the Police to go on fishing expeditions after locksmiths, alarm system maintenance engineers, security researchers, etc. etc.

          If you make it illegal to possess information that 'bad guys' can use, the only thing you achieve is making that information exclusive to 'bad guys'. After all, if you're going to commit a crime, you're not going to care. What it does mean is that everyone else knows nothing about the methods and mechanisms used by said 'bad guys', so cannot adequately defend themselves against them.

          For example, if it becomes illegal to publish information on flaws in certain types of commonly used locks, Joe Public will not know that these are flawed, and know not to use them.

          1. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

            Greetings to the single systematic downvoter!

            There is a distinct pattern here that most comments on this thread (the ones with the higher up-vote counts) also have a single down-vote.

            Rather than just angry-clicking that down-vote button, why not make a reasoned and thought-out argument against the posts that you don't like? You never know, you might find that others also share your point of view, or even that, in formulating your response, this leads to you having to think about the issues and reformulate your own conclusions?

      2. Captain Hogwash

        Re: Murder manuals

        That's most novels these days it seems. Unless they come from the Mills & Boon tradition.

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

        The problem with this is mission creep. No one will defend that it is a good thing to have such documents, but criminalising the possession rather than production or distribution, seems to me to be the lazy option that does not criminalise the right people. Just because it is easier to "catch" people possessing it, doesn't absolve the state from the responsibility to hunt down the abusers.

        As others have said above, the wide ranging and vague wording makes it fodder for a fishing expedition when the state wants to "get" someone, and they cannot find any other actual crime has been committed. We saw the anti terrorism laws, which in response to worries about the vague wording were promised to only be applied in really serious cases. Try explaining to the police that the home secretary said it would not be used for trivial cases and see how far you get. Strangely, the home secretary's vague assurances don't count in court, the wording of the law does.

        When they first criminalised possession of child pornography, (and I shouldn't need to say so, because any sane person would know that it is hideous stuff and those that produce it should be dealt with, but if I don't say it, people will assume I am for it, which I am not) I was uneasy because I suspected that having established the principle, it would be extended over time to include possession of other things that were not approved of. Then of course we got the possession of terror manuals, now this. Where next I wonder?

        Imagine if someone began issuing a manual of how to kill people, should possesion of that be banned? What about a story told in the first person about killing someone? A story containing a rape? A story where the lead character says something offensive or expresses a view about terrorism/paedophilic manuals that appears to support or "glorify" either?

        It is all quite worrying, and I wish people would wake up and pay attention to what is happening to our laws.

        They have established the principle, the arguments now are sadly all about where the arbitrary line is drawn, and of course the vague wording means it can be drawn wherever the state wishes.

        1. John Smith 19 Gold badge
          Unhappy

          Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

          "Imagine if someone began issuing a manual of how to kill people, should possesion of that be banned? What about a story told in the first person about killing someone? A story containing a rape? A story where the lead character says something offensive or expresses a view about terrorism/paedophilic manuals that appears to support or "glorify" either?"

          Why imagine?

          At least one has been published (in the USA of course).

          1st amendment rights. Not just for the causes you love, but also the causes you hate.

        2. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

          Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

          "but criminalising the possession rather than production or distribution"

          Too late. "They" have already defined the display of an image on a computer screen as "making" not simple possession.

        3. raphidae

          Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

          This has some pretty good arguments why those laws never should have existed in the first place (and its not because CP is good):

          http://falkvinge.net/2012/09/07/three-reasons-child-porn-must-be-re-legalized-in-the-coming-decade/

          http://falkvinge.net/2012/09/11/child-porn-laws-arent-as-bad-as-you-think-theyre-much-much-worse/

      4. Fibbles

        Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

        "I've no idea. It seems a little silly to me to have a law to cover a specific case of a manual that details how to commit a very specific crime.

        Why no legislation on burglary manuals? Or Murder manuals? Armed robbery manuals? (Maybe it's the programmer in me, but why not create an abstract law regarding the dissemination of criminal techniques in manuals and then have a concrete implementation for each crime?)"

        I assume it's brought to us by the same ridiculous thought process that created the law banning 'terrorist manuals'.

        You can legally own any number of books and scientific papers discussing the manufacture and use of bombs. Unless the police need a reason to give you trouble and you're of middle-eastern / Irish descent, then your books magically transmogrify into 'terrorist manuals'.

        Sometimes it's even just a matter of marketing;

        C.I.A.'s Improvised Munitions - perfectly fine.

        Mujahideen's Handbook - expect to spend the next 10 years behind bars.

        (FYI, I own none of the above. I'm not keen on being woken abruptly at 3am by stormtroopers.)

      5. Graham Marsden
        Childcatcher

        Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

        "Paedophilic manuals" are just a desperate attempt by the Tories to appeal to the Daily Heil reading public who have defected to UKIP...

        1. John Smith 19 Gold badge
          Unhappy

          Re: WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?

          ""Paedophilic manuals" are just a desperate attempt by the Tories to appeal to the Daily Heil reading public who have defected to UKIP..."

          Probably.

          The most likely kind of "grooming" going on here is grooming voters to vote for them.

    7. Buzzword

      Re: Shark Jumped!

      I have the recipe for Haribo sweets, a magazine for puppy owners, and a Haynes book for my white van. Would this constitute a paedo manual?

    8. S4qFBxkFFg

      @Will Godfrey Re: Shark Jumped!

      "WTF are 'paedophilic manuals'?"

      Do you keep getting older while they stay the same age?

      Is you significant other's niece/nephew sparking something in you?

      Has your head started turning while walking past schools during playtime?

      Well look no further! This book has everything you need to know!

      - written by experts for you!

      - real-life examples!

      - common mistakes which nobble novice nonces!

      Includes the following topics:

      Midget or child? - Learn the important differences by using a simple checklist!

      Age-of-consent maps! Who knows? it might be legal somewhere!

      Style advice - ditch the anorak, smarten up, and don't be a stereotype!

      Includes foreword from Dr. P. D. O'Bear.

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge
        Flame

        Re: @Will Godfrey Shark Jumped!

        "Includes foreword from Dr. P. D. O'Bear."

        That sounds like one of those dirty perverted paediatricians!!! Burn his house down!!! And the house next door, just in case!!!!

        <hint: it's a joke with overtones of sarcasm and irony>

      2. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

        Re: @Will Godfrey Shark Jumped!

        Do you keep getting older while they stay the same age?

        Don't remind me.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Is it going to have penalties for "the authorities" using hacking techniques too then? No thought not.

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Burn the bodice-rippers!

    No doubt fictionalised accounts will be covered by this too, to avoid the accusation of it being a 'loophole' the evil pedophiles could exploit. Better go through your library, make sure you don't have any novels in which the protagonist seduces anyone underage. And no excuses even if set in a historical context, that's just another loophole! Yay for more thoughtcrime.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Burn the bodice-rippers!

      Stop thinking that!

      You are not allowed to think bad of the government and its laws, we have dispatched a collection team, please go willingly, you will not be harmed... you can trust us....

    2. JimmyPage Silver badge
      Headmaster

      And the first question to make ££££ for the lawyers

      Underage when

    3. Steven Roper

      Re: Burn the bodice-rippers!

      "Better go through your library, make sure you don't have any novels in which the protagonist seduces anyone underage."

      Oh shit - better get rid of my copy of The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant then. That Chapter 7 of Lord Foul's Bane is a real doozy...!

  7. Tom 35

    New Computer misuse act penalties

    - Forcing a company to spend money to secure their system by publicizing a hole in there systems. 10 years.

    - Making someone important look bad by guessing their email password. 20 years.

    - Forgetting a laptop full of unencrypted personal data on the train. A brand new laptop.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Big Brother

    Point of order:

    "amend the Computer Misuse Act 1990 to ensure sentences for attacks on computer systems fully reflect the damage they cause"

    So does this mean a trivial URL re-write that causes no damage whatsoever will no longer be prosecutable?

    Like hell...

    1. John G Imrie

      Re: Point of order:

      You have caused damage. Disregarding the reputational damage to the company and the damage to the directors bonuses there is the cost of getting the Indian outsources to recode the web site.

      1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

        Re: Point of order:

        Indian outsources to recode the web site

        "The webhole will be shifted a bit to left, and down."

  9. Shaha Alam

    "you'll know it when you see it"

    there. that's all the wording you'll need for any of these laws. no need for costly legal consultations.

  10. the spectacularly refined chap

    Computer Misuse Act needs more of an update than that

    Bear in mind that it's 24 years old, i.e. it dates from an era when Internet access was still pretty exclusive. There are all kinds of things that need sharpening up in the modern connected world - unauthorized access comes to mind immediately.

    Realistically you have to accept some form of implied consent for things like access to a public-facing website, but that in itself opens up another can of worms if there is some kind of vulnerability: if something is put up there inadvertently meaning you can access it when the company didn't intend you to be able to then rationally that's their problem. If on the other hand you create some pattern of input that triggers a bug that allows you to access something you shouldn't you're breaking the law. The precise boundary between the two is completely undefined.

    Ideally you'd address that before it comes up in court. They're not going to so someone is going to either get convicted unfairly or get off when they shouldn't have. It's all clearly foreseeable now but it might need a bit of effort to actually fix it.

    1. Crisp

      Re: Computer Misuse Act needs more of an update than that

      I completely agree with you. There's just one problem.

      This legislation will be written by lawyers. A profession which is still passing documents around by fax machine.

      1. Nick Ryan Silver badge

        Re: Computer Misuse Act needs more of an update than that

        The progressive ones use fax machines now? Wow. Most seem incapable of progressing beyond photocopies of photocopies and 2nd class stamps.

        1. Loyal Commenter Silver badge
          Joke

          Re: Computer Misuse Act needs more of an update than that

          The progressive ones use fax machines now? Wow. Most seem incapable of progressing beyond photocopies of photocopies and 2nd class stamps.

          This is because they are paid by the hour, possibly including the hours that your documents are in the post.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Computer Misuse Act needs more of an update than that

        "This legislation will be written by lawyers. A profession which is still passing documents around by fax machine."

        If only.

        In the UK the limit on document "bundles" by email is 10 pages or 2MB.

        The MoJ has various attempts to sort out just the court time scheduling. AFAIK all have been complete fuckups.

      3. Intractable Potsherd

        Re: Computer Misuse Act needs more of an update than that

        Whilst there is a lot of old-skool document processing going on, I have to say it isn't universal. I'm just int the process of buying a house, and haven't yet met my solicitor despite retaining him about eight weeks ago. Everything has been done by phone or email, which suits me down to the ground.

    2. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Re: Computer Misuse Act needs more of an update than that

      unauthorized access comes to mind immediately

      Quite a lot of it by authorities.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So

    https everywhere

    disconnect

    DNSCrypt

    VPN

    TOR

    Anything else I should add to my shopping list? The more they do stuff like this, the more I want to hide my online presence. I'm not doing anything illegal to my knowledge, but who knows. One day I might search for nirvana, have the picture of the naked baby pop up and BAM I'm behind bars.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Re. update

    $Expletive that, the CMA needs tearing up entirely and rewriting from scratch.

    To include "the use of digital media, computers or other electronic devices for spying on people by or on behalf of Governments", punishable by hanging by the teeth over a pot of hydrofluoric acid.

    Also relevant, as worded there are no exemptions for historical works of art, so expect possession of digital pictures of many Greek statues or Michaelangelo's "David" to be criminalized under the new laws.

    "But your Honour, the picture is of someone who not only died over 400 years ago but a statue".. 40 years. NEXT!!!...

    (makes preparations to move somewhere more sensible, maybe North Korea)..

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Re. update

      More to the point, think of television. I can't count the number of times I've seen a babies bare rear end when an advert for pampers crops up. Everyone who sees that adverts should be arrested, and the people who made it strung up for distributing child porn.

      Absolutely disgraceful.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Mushroom

        Re: Re. update

        You didn't go far enough. Since, if the signal was broadcast, then every antenna in the country received it (including those at GCHQ,) so if it becomes law, you might as well drive your entire population into the sea.

  13. returnmyjedi

    Paedophile Manuel?

    Yet another 70s icon's shame revealed, made the worse after all that phew Rory when those bell ends phoned his granddaughter.

    1. JimmyPage Silver badge
      Coat

      phew Rory ?

      spearchucker ?

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's about time

    It's about time that Blighty get in touch with reality and digital crime. So far crims in the UK have gotten just a slap on the wrist. Japan's 2 year prison sentence minimum for pirates plus fines and 10 years plus fines for facilitators should be adopted world wide. Hackers should get a minimum of 10 years plus treble damages.

    1. Steven Roper
      Flame

      Re: It's about time

      Oh look, it's Anonymous "Burn 'em at the stake" Coward again. I told you before, imprisoning people for piracy costs more than it's worth. Burning them at the stake means you can set an example by terrorising all those evil downloaders into submission!

      1. Intractable Potsherd

        Re: It's about time

        Yep, it's the standard RIAA-type that turns up here every time. Never gives any reason for why such draconian sentences should be applied, but simply states the party line. Just a troll to be ignored.

    2. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Re: It's about time

      The Daily Mail is strong in this one. We must be careful.

  15. Far out man

    I guess the Bible would be included

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Mushroom

      And the Koran, too.

      I think we need a bigger explosion icon.

    2. John Smith 19 Gold badge
      Unhappy

      "I guess the Bible would be included"

      I think so.

      IIRC there a few fathers "begatting" with their daughters and if you do the math on some of the wives they'd definitely be classed as JB.

      I think in some cases you're in Jerry Lee Lewis territory.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    hostname:~ username$ man paedophilia

    No manual entry for paedophilia.

    Well, that's a relief!

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    so everything else is working away well to start focusing on such small issues?

    I just wonder if the rest of the UK, its economy, the populations health and well being is all in check and we are now birds of paradise with nothing else better to focus on ?

    I mean for a start I was watching the news (bbc news the other day) when Cameroon said the nation has been in a 7 year recession - I was gob smacked this is considering the BBC has done nothing but to brush the recession under the carpet. They have never labelled it as the recession and always looked at the problem from a global point of view rather than a local point of view.

    The health service is crumbling the kids are leaving school badly educated - we have a low level of high end skill workers and lots of low skilled workers fighting over minimum wage jobs.

    But hey this is how they like it - keep us all in check - keeping us worried about our next meal on the table rather than what on earth they are doing to destroy the country.

    I think it would have been better focused on the uk timebomb - google it - if you have no idea about the 1.4 trillion debt we owe and exactly to whom and for what reason ? Is it the chinese and most of it related to illegal wars over the last decade and the cost of security surrounding this.

    No go pat yourselves on the back done a great job in deceiving the nation yet again

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Trollface

      Re: so everything else is working away well to start focusing on such small issues?

      Yeah, but consider that the UK will now send an armored tank brigade and about 1000 men to Poland to drive around under Putin's nose like back in the times with Monty. Putin will yet know the power of the english taunt!

      Carry on!

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    ASSTR

    I guess it's a good job that alt.sex.stories text repository is not hosted in the UK then?

    1. John Smith 19 Gold badge
      Unhappy

      Re: ASSTR

      "I guess it's a good job that alt.sex.stories text repository is not hosted in the UK then?"

      True.

      The last outing of the Obscene Pub's Act was IIRC down to a story posted to there from a UK citizen.

      Politicians seem to have a huge problem with recognizing the difference between fantasy (as in "not real") with real life (as in "real")

      Perhaps because so many of the things they claim are fantasies?

  19. int21h

    Amend the Fraud & Abuse Act: Excellent then does one also intend to include "Fraudulent Service Providers" spying on the common folk whilst they siphon off Billions of Tax payers revenue into one's personal off-shore tax haven?!?

    Perhaps the genuine Fraud is the fact that most software in release to the Public is distributed with no warranty and this is done because of course these service providers actually place the malicious code in there own software and then to add insult to injury sell the vulnerabilities later on.

    CIA Sub-Project 11/9 (9-11) MKUltra and population mind control via the Telephone system they would have us all believe is a personal computer system. MJ12 - Magic or Majestic - Wording you'd be hard pressed to miss when examining your Microchips! UFO - Oh they're refering to Plan B & Plan 9 from Outer Space which has no Bugs and is in use by all 9 Major providers otherwise known as MAINWAY to the NSA who seem to operate under the assumption that the Bell-Southern Database is there's to use and abuse but saddly it is in point of fact open source and that means it belongs to the people too.

  20. corestore

    There was a case, a few years ago, being brought by Kent Police as I recall, where a prosecution was being attempted under the Obscene Publications Act, for the content of an entirely private online chat: the thinking being, presumably, that the scope of the OPA could be extended to virtually anything IF the participants in the conversation could be construed as 'publishing' to each other (for sufficiently warped and twisted definitions of 'publishing'). I believe El Reg reported on it at the time.

    I'd very much like to know what the final score was in that case; that hasn't been reported to my knowledge.

    (It may be relevant to the attempt to criminalize 'paedophilic manuals', whatever the hell they turn out to be. Probably virtually anything, IF in the possession of someone the police decide they want to charge with something...)

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    RE. Re. ASSTR

    What about all the Trek fanfic then?

    Pretty sure that all the stories featuring Kes on ST:Voy are illegal, after all "they only live ten years" is not a defence under the proposed amended Act.

    Insert other fanfic here, its pretty much guaranteed that it will be covered under "extreme pr0n", "terror manuals" or other fashionable buzzwords.

    A good example is the infamous ST:TOS episode featuring the homemade explosives, which showed the amounts AND how to identify the chemicals by taste.

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Yeah, lets start by regulating the sate use of computers to spy on us, bitch.

  23. focusforfun

    What's good for the goose . .

    So then it appears that computer crime is nearly on par with the destructiveness of modern government. If then penalties are being buttressed in the one area, . .

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