back to article The Reg's guide to cursing in Mongolian

The Mongolian government this week released guidelines on over 700 keywords which are now banned for websites in the country, and in so doing revealed to the world one of the most inventive list of swearwords since Roger’s Profanisaurus. The list of 774 Russian, Mongolian and English words published by the country’s telecoms …

COMMENTS

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  1. Captain DaFt

    “female hygiene accessory”

    Whoever signed off on banning that must've been a real douche.

    1. Chris Miller

      Re: “female hygiene accessory”

      Or even (one of my favourites) a douchewaffle (636).

    2. Peter Simpson 1

      Re: “female hygiene accessory”

      359 [goshdarnit], why don't you quit being a 262 [male genitalia] about it and go 284 [sexual act] yourself?

      (saving the list and code numbers for future reference)

      (boobs, funbags and gazungas notably absent?)

      1. Stu

        Re: “female hygiene accessory”

        Oh this is too perfect. Now we can bitch to each other using a standardised numbered table!

        You're a 102 63 103, I'll 98 your 478, you 725 673.

        1. GitMeMyShootinIrons

          Re: “female hygiene accessory”

          "You're a 102 63 103, I'll 98 your 478, you 725 673."

          Well, at my local Chinese, you'd have ordered Fried onion in hot chilli sauce, special fried rice, egg fried rice and mixed veg in black bean sauce. Unfortunately, they don't have the latter numbers...

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Heh. Spanish for fungus is "hongo". I'm gonna be calling people that all day. I have yet to find out what a panooch is. What a splendid list. I wish they'd sorted it alphabetically though.

    1. ratfox
      Windows

      sorted alphabetically

      If only we had some sort of contraption which would allow us to copy and paste in a text file, then run sort on it...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: sorted alphabetically

        If only they hadn't posted the list in as graphics, I would already have done so, thanks for the facetious advice. Yeah OCR, but the characters are fairly small and mixed; plus I'm not sure I can be bothered.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: sorted alphabetically

          I did so for shits and giggles … gocr has a bad time with the Cyrillic characters and isn't much better on the English ones.

          If someone is really up for a challenge, the results of my labours are here.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: sorted alphabetically

            I salute your efforts. My kit doesn't do Cyrillic either.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: sorted alphabetically

        such a machine would be complex and expensive, unlikely to be the sort of thing the average householder would want cluttering the place up.

        perhaps there would be a niche market amongst hobbyists?

  3. Gray Ham Bronze badge

    Can't see why "Chinese" would be banned ...

    Would they have to refer to "those-who-must-not-be-named, you know, people from that big country down south"?

    1. Elmer Phud

      "Would they have to refer to "those-who-must-not-be-named, you know, people from that big country down south"?"

      London?

  4. Ole Juul
    Coat

    Foolproof filter

    Put that list in your html header and you could plan a neuclear attack on Mongolia without them ever knowing about it.

    Mine's the one with the 2 for 1 Pizza Yurt coupons in the pocket.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Not all bad.

    Cockwomble seems to be safe for now.

  6. jake Silver badge

    I can't be arsed to look at the list ...

    ... but is "twatdangler" included? How about "glasshole" or "glassticle"?

    Banning individual words is pointless ... I guarantee that I can swear in perfect English without using a single word that is not allowed before the kiddies go to bed.

    1. 's water music

      Re: I can't be arsed to look at the list ...

      I guarantee that I can swear in perfect English without using a single word that is not allowed before the kiddies go to bed.

      Go on, it is at least as worthwhile as reading the reg site. Also, if anyone calls you out on your assertion you will know that you need to avoid t1, XOR, clumsy, guts, and female dog (although bitch is ok) in addition to more conventional profanity.

      megtei hunii ariun tsewriin heregsel (nsfw (perhaps))

      1. jake Silver badge

        Re: I can't be arsed to look at the list ...

        If you don't understand my message, "'s water music", your cranium is clearly lodged in your posterior.

        1. NumptyScrub
          Happy

          Re: I can't be arsed to look at the list ...

          quote: "I guarantee that I can swear in perfect English without using a single word that is not allowed before the kiddies go to bed."

          I would suggest that your assertion of being able to "swear" using child-friendly vocabulary is perhaps an over-simplification. "Swearing" as it relates to invective (as opposed to taking an oath) is generally understood as requiring the use of "swear words", which are those words one is not supposed to utter within hearing of the young.

          I completely agree that castigation (berating, reprimanding, rebuking etc.) is easily achieved without needing to revert to obscenities though. It is also generally more satisfying to do so, at least in my experience, especially so when the recipient is unused to such use of language :)

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I can't be arsed to look at the list ...

      " I guarantee that I can swear in perfect English without using a single word that is not allowed before the kiddies go to bed."

      Go on then

  7. Desidero

    O freddled gruntbuggly thy micturations are to me

    As plured gabbleblochits on a lurgid bee.

    Groop, I implore thee my foonting turlingdromes...

    mixed Mongolian/Russian/English cadence with a bit of Altai throat singing thrown in to boot. Banned in Mongolia, big in Europe.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    how

    That's banned this comment page then.

    I guess how must mean something else in Mongolian or Russian.

  9. ForthIsNotDead

    INGSOC

    Wow. They actually banned the word Bad.

    They'll be eradicating the orgasm next.

    1. John G Imrie

      They actually banned the word Bad.

      I think that's just to annoy the Michael Jackson fans.

      1. jake Silver badge

        Re: They actually banned the word Bad.

        Does anyone actually care about the Michael Jackson fan demographic?

        Just asking ...

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          re: Does anyone actually care about the Michael Jackson fan demographic?

          Maybe not. I blame it on the boogie.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: re: Does anyone actually care about the Michael Jackson fan demographic?

            Well I was going to blame it on the good times, or possibly the moonlight; but I think you are correct, Mr AC.

  10. Captain Hogwash

    Flip off!

    Bunch of flipping melon farmers.

  11. thosrtanner

    Wow. Apparently clumsy is right up there with feminine hygiene accessory. That's going to be painful.

  12. squigbobble

    "The latter, presumably, is a deadly insult to Mongolians' yurts."

    ...and 'yurt' is a deadly insult to the Mongolians' girs (or gurs, I don't think there's an English spelling for it) which is what they call them, according to a Mongolian.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Facepalm

    XOR

    They banned XOR (no. 566)? What would George Boole think!

    Seems anyone named Dick (no. 488) or Al (no. 421) is banished. As is the gardening implement, the hoe (319). Personal disorganisers are banned too (no. 306).

    And don't you Americans even think about gloating about your T1 (no. 706) Internet connections!

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I was working on a SAML system, some of our users were getting failed logins occasionally.

    SAML (in some of the profiles) ends up generating redirect URLs with encrypted messages in base64 embedded in them, and we eventually worked out these customers were using a filtering proxy that was excluding URLs with swear words in.

    Cue a swear word filtering library; when we generate a URL, we check to make sure there are no accidental "fuck"'s in the URL (regenerating it if necessary), and a bunch of highly amusing commits.

    1. Steve Knox

      So what you're saying...

      Is that, in order to please your more prudish users, you had to develop a system which couldn't give a fuck?

  15. Shrimpling

    657

    Members of Ireland's premier diving club will be disappointed to find out they are banned.

  16. andreas koch

    This list is clearly stolen

    from Claire Perry's computer.

  17. Old Handle

    Don't ask how

    No really, you better not ask, that's one of the banned words (373).

  18. Jamie Jones Silver badge
    Headmaster

    This week?

    The article is dated 15/3/2013 and the images 22/3/2013

  19. skeptical i
    Pint

    Cumdumpster -- great metaphor/image, but cockwaffle?

    Amazing what gets done with/to the English language by non-English speakers, innit.

    Not sure what to make of "huh" being added to the list, there goes half my outgoing correspondence.

  20. John Savard

    Incidentally, in Canada

    What the Yanks call a form W-1, we call a T-4 slip. (Apparently, that's a P60 in Britain.)

    And what the Yanks call a form 1040. we call a form T-1. (Apparently, that's an SA100 in Britain.) So one can't search for a Canadian tax return from Mongolia.

  21. ammabamma
    Unhappy

    I am disappointed.

    No mention whatsoever of "chutney ferret" or "Dutch lobster".

    I wonder if we can lobby the Mongolian government to add the names of {politician from opposite party}, {obnoxious tech company}, {unpopular programming language}, and "Patent Lawyer" to the naughty list?

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