back to article Range Rover Evoque Si4

By the time the Range Rover Evoque is launched in September, Land Rover expects to be producing one every seven seconds from its Halewood factory, which should leave you in no doubt as to how important Range Rover views its first step into true mainstream motoring. Range Rover Evoque Si4 Land Rover's Range Rover Evoque Si4: …

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  1. stucs201

    Now go and test it properly

    While you might technically have taken it off road I don't see enough mud on it to indicate you took it anywhere more challenging than where I'd happily take a metro.

    1. Steven Raith
      Thumb Up

      Sounds like a realistic off road test...

      ...seeing as about as far off road 90% of these will get is Waitrose car park, and possibly in a field/farm track, much like 90% of all off roaders.

      I'd rather have a Subaru Legacy meself, if I needed mild off road ability, though - a bit less bling and showy, but then that's personal taste...

      Steven R

    2. Anton Ivanov

      Exactly.

      This does not pass my standard 4x4 test.

      It will not get through the dirt track to my country house. It is nothing challenging by the way. Old discovery, trucks, VW Caravelle or even the old (1991) Clio can make it in dry weather.

      All of them however have higher ground clearance than this joke. What a Fail.

  2. sebacoustic
    Thumb Down

    License to drive

    are you eligible for buying one of these without being a registered pimp?

  3. Pen-y-gors

    Chunky

    Seems to be built like a tank, so it's multi-purpose. Drive the kids the 400 yards to school and then go and do a bit of ram-raiding down the nearest retail park - should make mincemeat of the steel shutters on PC World.

    Why do they show pictures of it off-road? Seriously, what proportion of these will ever go into a field, never mind climbing muddy hillsides. Surely their only purpose is clogging the roads in Chelsington.

  4. Tim #3

    Hmmmm

    "The Evoque Coupé destroys the Freelander for looks: the squat, muscular front end, paired with aggressively rising shoulder and the raking windscreen combine to produce a sharp, purposeful front-end that encourages other drivers to move over as you approach." That's pushing it a bit. I thought it looks a bit bland and kind of wannabe.

    If you want some genuine classy looks instead, check out ebay's current offerings of a Merc 450 SEL 6.9 and a CB400F Cafe. Not that I'm showing my age or anything... bah humbug

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Meh

    Better looking?

    "Still, it’s substantially better-looking than just about anything in its class - compare it to the more expensive BMW X5, for instance."

    You make out that the X5 is a pig - hardly - especially when there are plenty of really ugly 4x4's out there.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    test it properly?

    Wanker tanks such as this are not for off-road use, they're for idiots with very small genitalia and/or brains to cart around their foul offspring in disgusting opulence while treating other road users like crap.

    1. Sulphur Man

      heh heh.... jealous

      Go on, admit it.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Mushroom

      YOU, SERF, ARE MY CRUMPLE ZONE...

      a sharp, purposeful front-end that encourages other drivers to move over as you approach.

      What the fuck sort of comment is that? These wretched shit-heaps are the pinnacle of inconsiderate driving, forever hogging the middle lane, on the phone to Hugo, making others drive-of road to pass them in narrow lanes - and with a centre of mass aimed straight at my head. Driving is not supposed to be a fucking Arms Race

      Erm, did that sound a bit angry ?

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Bit squat

    Saw a couple of these driving round Liverpool City Centre this morning (they're made in nearby Halewood). The squat look may be en vogue but it looks like someone's rolled a Freelander and then tried to stretch back in to shape.

    Paris - insert squat double entendre here

  8. Mondo the Magnificent
    Meh

    May the force be with you

    James May tested one of these on Top Gear a while back and it seems like a capable offroader too, although in the Top Gear tradition they did eventually find an obstacle it couldn't clear...

    To be honest I don't see the point of a coupe/4 door mid sized 4x4 that sort of fits between the Freelander 2 and Range Rover where I believe the capable and well equipped Discovery 3 seems to fit

    Perhaps Land Rover are tageting the shrunken Range Rover at those with equally shrunken budgets, i.e. too posh for a Freelander 2 and too poor for a Range Rover Sport/Vogue, but a little too individual to drive a Discovery 3.

  9. Jemma
    FAIL

    Put it into sport mode and the dash goes red...

    Is that by design, or did all of the idiot lamps go on in praise of Lucas, Prince of Darkness?

    Ditto on the off road, ive taken a Humber Sceptre across more challenging terrain that that, after 2 solid days rain, and I didnt get set once. The same cannot be said of bmw drivers, whose concept of off road driving is:-

    1. Get in, start up.

    2. Select reverse

    3. Floor it

    4. Wonder why everyone is laughing and why your 5 series is up to its back axle in mud.

    To be fair, I did sort of cheat, Im a farmers daughter, so I learned all the tricks long ago.

    Not really a fan of this car, its pretty but thats what you want if you're a lil rich girl at a finishing school - its no use whatsoever when its the middle of february and you are elbow deep up a sheeps jacksie at 3am.

    1. Danny 14
      Go

      yup

      for that its a series 2a (in my day) or a 110 defender for my son. Just hose it down when you have finished (and keep black bin bags under the seat for a dry arse.)

  10. Patrick O'Reilly
    FAIL

    Mashup

    From the front it looks like a VW Passat, from behind a BMW X6

  11. DRendar
    Megaphone

    Kerb Weight / Towing capability?

    Considering that the only feasible excuse for buying one of these is to tow something, where are the Kerb Weight and Towing tests?

    Can it pull a horse box for example? And are there any decent Diesel engines - other than the 2WD one you mentioned?

    I'm of a mixed feeling about this vehicle... I feel extremely patriotic about LandRover - they are incredible 4x4 vehicles - probably the best in the world, but it makes me mad when they are driven by inconsiderate twats who only use them for driving Quentin and Chardonnay to school, where they block the road and have never so much as driven though a puddle during their existence.

    A 3 door Range Rover? For fucks sake....

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      3 doors

      Actually some of the first rangies were 3 doors.

      What should have you spluttering your post-shoot brandy into your 'tash is the 2-wheel drive diesel edition. That's the sign of the pending apocalypse that is...everyone knows rangies are 4x4!

      1. DRendar
        Coffee/keyboard

        New Keyboard Please!

        "What should have you spluttering your post-shoot brandy into your 'tash is the 2-wheel drive diesel edition."

        Love it. Genius :-)

        1. MJI Silver badge

          2 wheel drive and wrong wheel drive

          As even the S1 S2 S3 were 2WD switchable to 4WD.

          the rubbish version will be a bit of a joke.

    2. Tom 35

      LandRover - they are incredible 4x4 vehicles

      Once long ago when they sold them to farmers and such. Now that they sell them to twats with too much money, highway ride, and a nice radio are more important.

    3. MJI Silver badge

      3 door Range Rover

      Of course they were for well over a decade

      1. Danny 14

        not really

        i'd prefer a land cruiser to a range rover any day.

    4. DRendar
      Facepalm

      3Dr Landies

      Yes, sorry I should have clarified - of course landies have come in 3dr before... Hell my Step Dad has a classic 3Dr SWB. LOL

      I was referring more to it being a 3Dr Coupe.

  12. Dr Who

    Prismatic screen eh? Nice ...

    If it can travel through time, it's bigger on the inside than on the outside and it comes with a nubile assistant, I'll take two ...

    1. Throatwobbler Mangrove
      Thumb Up

      have to say

      "Passengers can also perform the impressive trick of watching TV or a DVD while the driver keeps an eye on the sat nav, thanks to the screen’s prismatic dual-view technology, which presents a different image depending on your viewing angle. "

      That sounds pretty f'ing cool.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    lalalallalalalal

    "A 3 door Range Rover? For fucks sake...."

    er. A return to it's roots - a couple of pics of 2 door Mk1 Range Rovers here -

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Range_Rover_Classic

    and on the Land Rover through to the present day - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Land_Rover_Series

    This new thing? Hideous. Much like the Mini Countryman (-o-r=Ronseal)

    1. DRendar

      Yep

      I already clarified my frenzied spittle covered comment above. In the thread.

      Why didn't you click reply so that your comment was added to the thread?

  14. CC

    Seriously UGLY

    This thing looks a throwback to the worst of American SUV's,

    Seriously lacking in any kind of side or rear visibility right off the bat and from there it quickly goes down hill.

    This is styling that went out over five years ago with the Chrysler Magnum and the like (super high doors and tiny squnched up windows), looks like a drug lab on wheels!

    1. Shades

      Are you mad?

      The Chrysler Magnum (or 300c as its called in Blighty) is a fantastic looking car. It may not be the best handling car in the world and it may be a big ol' lump, but, styled right, it looks completely badass. And the noise from the Hemi V8 version... wow!

      I have to say I like the high/rising shoulder line and squished windows look, and its STILL very much in vogue... the latest Renault Megane (especially the lowered GT version which emphasises the high/rishing shoulder line) and the new VW Scirocco which, again styled right, is a beautiful machine.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: UGLY

      Isn't this the one styled by the mistress of taste and refinement, Victoria Beckham?

      Somehow it manages to look expensive AND cheap at the same time by appearing to be styled for rap stars who shop at Clare's Accessories.

  15. louis walsh's toilet
    FAIL

    jd power?

    will it be poorly rated like the freelander then?

  16. Zog The Undeniable
    FAIL

    So petrol's £1.35 a litre

    and heading upwards, there is nowhere to park and VED is penal (huhuhuh, he said "penile") for vehicles such as this.

    Yet people still buy them instead of an equally capable (for the 99% of people who don't go off road) estate car. Weird.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Built and designed in the UK

    I'd say pretty damn fine. Personally I would rather the two tone. Red body and white roof.

    But in all fairness I work for JLR so more than a little biased

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Stop

    No ta

    "encourages other drivers to move over " one for the tailgaters then?

  19. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    4x2, 4x4

    4x4 petrol and a 2wd diesel. That's a big fail before they start.

    Either they'll rush out a derv 4x4 or this'll flop rapidly.

    Oh and BTW when you spend £40k and it'll only do 30mpg and VED is £400 don't expect much of a trade in price in three years when petrol is £2 a litre.

    And I actually quite like the look of the car.

    1. Mark 65

      Agreed

      Having a 2.0 FWD diesel myself I can vouch for the machine's ability to want to spin the wheels at any opportunity due to the high torque on offer at very low revs. I also consider buyers of petrol 4x4s (not AWDs) to be total twunts. The very nature of 4x4 calls for high torque at low revs i.e. diesel power.

      1. MJI Silver badge

        Nothing wrong with petrol

        Didn't the best off roader in the work run a 3.5 petrol V8 for nearly 20 years?

        I have driven a V8 Discovery, plenty of torque not that much power.

        As to running costs, LPG is great

  20. Lottie

    produce a sharp, purposeful front-end

    produce a sharp, purposeful front-end that encourages other drivers to move over as you approach.

    Or maybe not because they'll assume you're a dick who thinks like this and not move just to piss you off.

    Maybe other drivers wouldn't need to be intimidated out of the way if tools in SUVs realized that indicators and highway code are there for a reason.

  21. WonkoTheSane
    Paris Hilton

    Design consultant = Victoria Beckham

    According to Top Gear this season.

    Paris wants one in bubblegum pink to go with her Bentley.

  22. Graham Bartlett

    @stucs201

    Too right. "Oh there's a little bit of dirt on the wheels and grass underfoot, it must be offroad..." My arse.

    As an ex-hang-glider pilot, I took my old Montego and Cavalier up and down things it really wasn't designed for. Only got stuck once, and that was me being a prat and not only picking a bit of slippery uphill grass but then trying to turn whilst reversing down. Have once or twice got lifts on some *proper* offroad to take-off, and those came with a warning from the organisers that if you didn't have a low-range box, limited-slip diff and proper shocks, don't even think about it.

  23. Sarah Davis
    Coat

    tip your Bowler

    does anyone else think it looks like a poor mans clone of a Bowler Nemesis (which is itself a rebuilt Range Rover). You can imagine the clueless upper management at Range Rover seeing the Nemesis when it came out thinking 'phwoarrr, why didn't we think of that. I know lets copy it and say we thought of it first - inevitably, they got it wrong!

  24. ravenviz Silver badge
    Unhappy

    Lost roots

    Don't like it. Just do Defender.

  25. Nick Galloway

    Homogenous

    The styling seems a step into the mainstream industry design. Land Rovers are about being chunky, robust, flexible and getting you to your destination irrespective of the environment. They are supposed to have a bullet proof reputation. This one looks like it has a skirt with matching hand bag accessories. Bring back a retro version than can be dismantled in the field with the included tool kit.

    1. MJI Silver badge

      It is to extend their market

      + makes money for a UK company (even if Indian owned)

      + it is also used to get a lower average CO2 thingy

      - Looks a bit odd

      - a 2WD version is a joke

  26. bh
    Paris Hilton

    different market.....

    its aimed at the girls.... Victoria Beckham is fronting the marketing .... personally i prefer the Disco - a Range Rover Sport sans bling

  27. KJB
    Mushroom

    Range Rover Drivers

    Anybody would've thought that they're an easy bunch to hate.

    Why is that I wonder?

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What next - washing machine reviews?

    After all, they have computers controlling them. That's 'leccy tec', innit guv?

  29. Peter 48
    Meh

    purely for the yanks

    The whole design is clearly geared towards the yank market, which is where i would expect 90% of these will end up.vpersonally i would choose a ford kuga over this - a lot better looking and with a much better fuel economy for a good 15k less fully specc'd

  30. Mr Larrington
    WTF?

    Mainstream motoring?

    I'm obviously a skinflint, coz a car that can be specced up to the best part of forty-five grand doesn't sound very mainstream to me. also the involvement of Victoria Beckham should be enough to deter any right-minded person from buying this particular variety of wankpanzer.

  31. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Nonsense.

    "clogging the roads in Chelsington"

    How exactly - they may be taller than the average car but I bet they are not significantly longer than alternatives - i.e. people carriers, estate cars or even a mid/large saloon.

    So realistically they take up no more room - it's the number of cars not their size that really matters unless everyone wants to drive a Smart car?

  32. JMB
    Thumb Down

    RE: Range Rover Evoque Si4

    Ugly looking thing but that seems policy for Land Rover now with Freelander, Discovery and Range Rover getting progressively uglier with each change of design.

    The ground clearance could not be much worse than a Freelander, I had one at work and regularly grounded it on rough tracks. I got used to hearing bangs underneath.

  33. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Saw loads of these in Liverpool on Monday

    And the Monday before, seems like they were give the hacks their road tests. Which given how they were driving them, makes me think they need to redo their driving tests!

    However the 3 door cars look great, if these get X5/X3 etc off the road and replaced with something built here in the UK it can only be a good thing.

  34. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    So you mean you want...

    "Wanker tanks such as this are not for off-road use, they're for idiots with very small genitalia and/or brains to cart around their foul offspring in disgusting opulence while treating other road users like crap"

    So you mean you want one but can't afford one - awww...

  35. Mike Flex

    a sharp, purposeful front-end that encourages other drivers to move over as you approach

    Known as barges in my circles, due to their owners' habit of barging through all other traffic.

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