back to article Lads from Lagos pop up in Libya

They get about a bit, the Lads from Lagos, and evidently couldn't resist a quick jaunt to Libya, where they've stumbled across a vast wad of wonga. We've said it before and we'll say it again: we do wish the lads would invest a small portion of their riches beyond the wildest dreams of avarice on a decent guide to the English …

COMMENTS

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  1. mdava

    I know that it's a very old scam

    . . . but that is priceless just for the wholesale slaughter of the English language.

  2. Anonymous John

    There's nothing lads won't try and exploit.

    lord camberlain office <lordchamberlainpalace@yahoo.co.uk>

    The queen of England has invited you to the royal wedding of prince william and kate middleton.the queen has sent out nearly two thousand gold invitations.about one thousand nine hundred people ranging from family and friends,foreign dignitaries,diplomats,soldiers and charity workers,have all been asked to attend the wedding.you are eligible to be selected among the guests that will attend thequeens reception and prince charles dinner. the royal invitation with each unique royal serial number[no:21867320]will enable each of the invited guests to obtain a british visa from thier various countries.you are advised to contact the chamberlain office for enquiry like travelling arrangements,accomodation and other micelleanious matters immediatelly two weeks before the date of the wedding to avoid inconveniences.The edges of the card, which is about 10 in. by 6 in., are beveled and then gilded. The simple wording reads that the Lord Chamberlain has been "commanded by the Queen" to i nvite the holder to the ceremony. Guests are asked to wear military uniform, a morning coat or a "lounge" (business) suit. 600 of the 1,900 invitees have also been invited by the Queen to a reception immediately following the ceremony, and 300 of those are also invited to a dinner hosted by William's father, Prince Charles, later that evening at Buckingham Palace. Tags: British royalty, Buckingham Palace, Kate Middleton, London, Prince Charles, Prince William, Queen of England, royal family, Royal Wedding, royalty, UK, wedding.however ,some of the invited guests are the lucky winners of a royal lottery which the queen requested through random selection of email users around the british colonised nations. attention;urgent reply to this invitation and for further enquiries,please contact below. CONTACTS': ADDRESS; state invitation secretary,lord chamberlain's office buckingham palace,london SW1A 1AA www.officialroyalwedding2011.org,www.ro ... oyals.info. www.abcnews.go.com www.british.gov.uk lordchamberlainpalace@yahoo.co.uk +447024079374 +447024082406

    1. 4HiMarks
      Thumb Up

      cost-saving measure?

      Does the Lord Chamberlain have a Yahoo account to save the Crown money for proper domain registration and hosting fees?

  3. Nick Davey
    FAIL

    my favourite part is...

    .."I'm not well comfortable with this luggage , understand me dear" I didn't know they came from the east end.....

  4. Risky
    Pint

    topical but not that special

    My favourite was the 419 with "Unless this money is claimed it will be used to recruit child soldiers" or similar.

  5. Proud Father
    FAIL

    FAIL

    What a load of bollocks!

    Makes some of prior efforts look intelligent by comparion.

  6. Peter Simpson 1
    Badgers

    Remain Blessed!

    And please top calling me "dear", we haven't even met!

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    100 years?

    "...been kept for 10 decades, big black luggage".

    It's an antique too.

    1. Elmer Phud
      Boffin

      Just watch out for loads of little feet!

      as title

  8. Svantevid
    Happy

    Not sure it's the right currency

    "huge amount of united state dollars, left behind which has been kept for 10 decades"

    ---

    For hundred years, eh? Are we sure it's not Confederate dollars we're talking about?

    Yes, I know it's been 146 years since the end of the American Civil War.

  9. Crazy Goat Man Al
    Black Helicopters

    My favourite one was this:

    This is HTML source of message you composed. Do not modify here. To modify this message press HTML Messages Editor button.

    ANTI-TERRORIST AND MONETARY CRIMES DIVISION

    FBI HEADQUARTERS IN WASHINGTON, D.C.

    Federal Bureau Of Investigation.

    FBI-Washington Field Office

    601 4th Street, NW

    Washington, DC 20535

    Website: www.fbi.gov

    It has been discovered that your contract/inheritance/winning FUND was about being transferred to an unknown account under your name. This

    attempt was perpetrated by someone who claims to be working for you, and that you have given him due authority to have the FUND moved to

    the account specified below:

    SOUTHWESTERN FEDERAL CREDIT UNION

    WESCORP 924 OVERLAND COURT

    SAN DIMAS, CA 91772. USA.

    ACCOUNT NUMBER: 322079133

    ABA/ROUTING NUMBER: 1220-41-21-9

    SHARETYPE NO.: 25

    FINAL CREDIT HABIB FENZI AND CO. (Beneficiary).

    The Federal Bureau of Investigation (F.B.I.) waded in after being alerted by the supposed bank. We investigated and found that there is a

    possible money laundering activity in play.The FUND US$10,500,000.00(Ten Million Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars) was found to

    be deposited in Bank of America in your name pending your consent to have it transferred to the new account indicated above. It was further

    revealed that initial FUND transfer originated from Nigeria to England and now here in Bank of America in USA.

    These transfers did not follow due process in line with the international FUND transfer rules and regulation.Consequently,we suspect this

    be a terrorism funding, drug related fund deposit and/or money laundering. As stated above, the FUND has your name on it; and you must have

    it cleared of any connection with any of these illegal activities.Be informed that FAILURE to have this cleared out will attract a JAIL

    TERM.We will not hesitate to visit the full weight of the law upon you if you do not clear this fund.There is every indication that you are

    involved in this shady deal.

    Finally, you are expected to have the CLEARANCE DOCUMENT obtain from where the FUND originated from to have you and your fund cleared. Only

    then shall we release your FUND as clean money devoid of any illegality, and you will be free of any involvement. To this end, you are to

    contact Mr. Peter Anderson of the Anti Graft Department of Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (E.F.C.C.) Nigeria and have the

    DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY SEAL of TRANSFER (DIST) CLEARANCE DOCUMENT obtained. Contact him through this direct email

    address: efcc.antigraftnigeria@qatar.io .Note that you have 72hrs to obtain this crucial Documentation.

    This has to be cleared!

    You are warned!

    Faithfully Yours

    Robert S. Mueller III

    FBI Director

    Federal Bureau Of Investigation.

    FBI-Washington Field Office

    601 4th Street, NW

    Washington, DC 20535

    www.fbi.gov

    Note that they arent asking for money, threatening me with jail if i dont reply! Helicopters because thats what the fbi will need to get me here in the UK

  10. Anonymous South African Coward Bronze badge
    Thumb Down

    I'm in my dear...

    ...where do we meet, my dear? At the local cop shop?

    Ere' wot a butchery of language, grammar, spelling and everything else in between.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    "sir, if you just give me your bank account number and sort code..."

    I think I can get away with offering one really useful tip for the 419ers:

    Normal English-speaking people do not ever use the term 'monies'!

    This has probably got something to do with the fact that money is a collective noun, of which there can be a little or lots. There is no such thing as 'a money'.

    Of course in some specific areas of finance the term will be heard more frequently. It's just that your regular guy on the street will not be used to hearing it and therefore it immediately should arouse suspicion.

    1. Fab De Marco
      Joke

      Collective Nouns?

      So is that like the plural of sheep is geese?

      1. asiaseen

        No, the singular

        of sheep is shoop.

    2. Kubla Cant
      Headmaster

      Well, actually....

      ... the term "monies" _is_ sometimes used by the stuffier type of financial or legal person.

      I have no idea how "monies" differs from "money". I suspect it's a kind of euphemism. Market traders and the like may soil their hands with "money", but we are accountants/solicitors/bank managers, and we only handle "monies" - cf "funds".

      And why is "monies" the plural of "money", when "monkeys" is the plural of "monkey"?

      1. Tom Wood

        Like people

        People can do most things, but not occupy a lift; they then become "persons".

        Still better than "bodies" I suppose.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @There's nothing lads won't try and exploit

    For anyone who follows the Doonesbury strip .... then looks like they got a taker for this scam

    http://www.doonesbury.com/strip/archive/2011/04/11

  13. brain_flakes
    Joke

    Any country?

    "I want this luggage to move out from Libya immediately, i will make arrangement how to meet up, with you in any country of your choice"

    Any country? Can you meet me at Heathrow? I'll call for a driver to pick you up, I'll get him to wear a name badge so you can find him, his name is Mr. "Police"

  14. NoneSuch Silver badge

    I feel unloved...

    All I get is the same homeless guy every lunch hour asking me for spare change. I need to be a little less careful with my email.

  15. JeepBoy
    Happy

    Bad Grammar FTW!

    I'm sure I read somewhere that the atrocious spelling and grammar of the Lagos lads’ posts was actually a neat psychological trick.

    The idea being that the email would suck in the terminally stupid – no surprises there! – but would also tempt a few cleverer folk. These clever folk would realise it was a scam, but they’d reckon that as the scam was being perpetrated by a bunch of clearly illiterate morons, they’d be able to turn it around and so scam the scammers!

    Some folk are too clever by half… the scammers realise that... and hope that these “clever folk” will try to prove it.

  16. Dr G

    and now from Beijing

    Here's a different twist. The boys are in Beijing with a Guinness and the contact person is Pedro.

    Guinness Breweries International Lottery Promotion

    Guinness House,N99 Raffles Place,

    Beijing,China (ASIA DISTRICT).

    =======================================

    Our Reference: GUS/2010/0098/010.

    Our Batch: GUS01/2010/GUS

    Dear Lucky Winner,

    This is to inform you that your email ID have won you a prize money of USD$1,000,000.00(One Million United States Dollars)For Guinness International Lottery promotion which is organized by Guinness Breweries Company China,Your Email-ID was selected as one the lucky winner in This Year 2011 Guinness Breweries Company Promotion, And Your E-Mail Address Was Submitted as one Of the Winner For the Year 2011. After E-Mail Address are Been Submitted to us for the Random Selection By Microsoft Corporation,we only select ten people as our winners,through electronic balloting System without the winner applying.

    These are your Identification Numbers:

    REF: GUS/2010/0098/010

    BATCH: GUS01/2010/GUS

    WINNING NUMBER: GUS/00007/2010

    VERIFICATION AND FUNDS RELEASE FORM

    -------------------------------------

    1.Full Name:....

    2.Contact Address:....

    3.Sex:....

    4.Date Of Birth:......

    5.Marital Status:......

    6.Nationality:......

    7.State:......

    8.City:.......

    9.Zip Code:......

    10.Occupation:......

    11.Tel/Fax Number:.....

    To file for your claim, please fill and submit your verification form to our claims manager immediately via email for the release of your winning funds.

    (CLAIMS MANAGER)

    Contact Person: Mr.Pedro Lee.

    Tele:+8613729846401

    Email: guinnessspecialaward@yahoo.com.cn

    Congratulation Once More And Please Do Not Forget to help the poor in the society when Guinness Breweries Company makes you a Beneficiary.

    Yours Faithfully,

    Mrs.Shen's Lin

    Online Promotion Announcer,

    Guinness Breweries Lottery Promotion,

    China,(ASIA DISTRICT).

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