Hottest day
Oh, poor souls! Meanwhile, here in the Grim North, AKA Nobodygivesafuckia, we've already had 30+C highs, once again proving, were proof needed, that if you don't live in the South East, you don't count.
Bake, you artisan sandwich eating property-obsessed snowflakes. Feel that? That's what not being in control of your life feels like: Inescapable.
Joking aside, the BBC could melt into an amorphous puddle of media luvvie nonsense and I wouldn't care.