back to article Townsfolk left deeply unsatisfied by Bury St Edmunds' 'twig' of a Christmas tree

Yeah, yeah, "It's November, I don't want to hear the C word until the 24th of December" and so on – tell that to the denizens of Bury St Edmunds in Suffolk, England, who have been left feeling cold after the arguably premature erection of the town's Christmas tree. The yule totem was stood to attention this week by community …

Page:

  1. Khaptain Silver badge

    A decent star can add a good six inches

    And create a whole load of other problems.......ouch

    1. The Dogs Meevonks Silver badge

      Re: A decent star can add a good six inches

      I read 'A star can add a good six inches' and my first thought was .. Yeah and some trollop will try and make some money selling that story to the tabloids.

      Then I realised... oh.. not that kind of 'star' :)

  2. pig

    Meh.

    Imagine the comments if they had a 50ft tree covered with loads of decorations.

    It would be all "Why are you spending on a tree instead of children's / adult / other council services"

    Council's can't win. Damned it they do, damned if they don't in this world where everyone is a critic and we seem to compete with each other over who can spot any semblance of fault first.

    1. Captain Scarlet

      I thought the whole point was to promote your town as the place to go for Christmas Shopping and the Christmas Experience for their retail tenants?

      1. hplasm
        Pint

        Christmas Experience for their retail tenants?

        Tennants Xmas retail experience?

        36 pack with holly on top!

        1. defiler

          Re: Christmas Experience for their retail tenants?

          Tennants Xmas retail experience?

          That's Tennents. It's also from Glasgow, so I'm duty-bound to hate it in lieu of Deuchars, which they at least still brew in Edinburgh (although I believe most is from Tadcaster these days).

        2. The Dogs Meevonks Silver badge

          Re: Christmas Experience for their retail tenants?

          I've always found it amusing that Tenants lager' seems to be one of the favourite tipples of the homeless. :)'

          1. katrinab Silver badge

            Re: Christmas Experience for their retail tenants?

            In England it is White Lightning cider, in Scotland, I thought it was Buckfast?

      2. GruntyMcPugh Silver badge

        @Captain Scarlet: "promote your town as the place to go for Christmas Shopping"

        Not being gouged for parking would give a town a higher ranking for me, over the size of their Xmas tree.

    2. Spazturtle Silver badge

      This tree was donated so the council didn't even pay for it.

      1. Public Citizen
        Go

        The careful reader will note that it is TWO trees that have been donated.

    3. katrinab Silver badge

      In my town centre, it is the Business Improvement District that pays for the tree, and that is funded by the shop keepers as an additional precept on their council tax, and it is an entirely separate budget to other council services.

    4. Wilseus

      Agree, but minus one point for "council's"

  3. Giovani Tapini

    In full respect to the article wording...

    While the town "pines" for a more respectably sized tree, this story resin-ated with me as other towns have gone through this in recent years. I find that in some cases the people have actually got a point, so its no wonder they start needling the council.

    The problem is that if there is too much girth you cant fit it into the hole. If there is too much length it starts getting wobbly and cannot maintain its erection. My wife tells me that tinsel is too scratchy and irritating leaving me with just the balls for decoration.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: In full respect to the article wording...

      Very good Giovani :-)

      1. Pedigree-Pete
        Thumb Up

        Re: In full respect to the article wording...

        At the risk of being racist... abbastanza eccellente Giovani

    2. Efer Brick

      Re: In full respect to the article wording...

      Barking mad!

    3. Daedalus

      Re: In full respect to the article wording...

      You are Alistair Dabbs and I claim my 5 quid.

      (Make it 50 will you. Inflation and all that sort of thing)

      1. Giovani Tapini

        Re: In full respect to the article wording...

        I am not Alistair Dabbs. I am still working out if I should take that as a compliment or insult though!

    4. David 132 Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: In full respect to the article wording...

      Excellent tree puns. I bough down in admiration.

      However, given that this is nominally an IT site, I'm surprised no-one has mentioned SAP yet. Tree sap, geddit?

      Oh, please yourselves.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    People often forget that a tree looks much taller to children than it does to an adult.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      What about tall children and small adults?

  5. disgruntled yank

    Goodness

    Fair play demands that I tell you that there is a Christmas tree already set up just south of the White House. I haven't looked that closely, but I think that the sole decoration so far is a big ribbon in a dull red. Most likely the size would more than satisfy the Buriers--something around thirty feet, I suppose.

    Though I have long since become used to neighbors who put up Halloween decorations by the first of October, it does seem early to be putting up Christmas trees.

    1. hplasm
      Coat

      Re: Goodness

      "there is a Christmas tree already set up just south of the White House"

      With a wiiggy effigy of The Great Trumpkin Pumpkin on top?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Goodness

      "the sole decoration so far is a big ribbon in a dull red."

      One of Donald's ties?

      1. The Dogs Meevonks Silver badge

        Re: Goodness

        "One of Donald's ties?"

        They were originally going to decorate it in 'Lies' but couldn't find a tree big enough on the entire planet.

    3. Tom 7

      Re: Goodness

      I look forward to the coming storms blowing it to bits.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Not Technical!

    This really isn't in any way technical or scientific, so what is it doing here?!

    Oh, I see. It offers numerous opportunities for double entendre and allusion to penile dimensions and engorgement - which is what technology is all about these days..........<sigh>.......

    1. Snivelling Wretch

      Re: Not Technical!

      Sometimes El Reg does branch out from it's core subject matter, but I can see this needles you.

    2. onefang
      IT Angle

      Re: Not Technical!

      "This really isn't in any way technical or scientific, so what is it doing here?!"

      It's in the Bootnotes section, you must be new here. Also, you left off the appropriate icon -->

      1. DavCrav

        Re: Not Technical!

        "It's in the Bootnotes section, you must be new here."

        He just hasn't twigged yet.

        1. BebopWeBop

          Re: Not Technical!

          The fjords beckon fo this one.

        2. Locky
          IT Angle

          Re: Not Technical!

          As Aussie commentards would say;

          Spruce!

    3. DavCrav

      Re: Not Technical!

      "Oh, I see. It offers numerous opportunities for double entendre and allusion to penile dimensions and engorgement - which is what technology is all about these days..........<sigh>......."

      Speaking of double entendres, in German the act of doing physical exercise with a dog is referred to as das Dogging.

      I will just leave that here and walk away.

      1. 's water music
        Coat

        Re: Not Technical!

        Speaking of double entendres, in German the act of doing physical exercise with a dog is referred to as das Dogging.

        uk=same, but single entendre shirley?

        I will just leave that here and walk away.

        Common doggers' conversation. Fnaar <explodes>

  7. Warm Braw

    twee Christmas

    I think you missed a twick...

  8. onefang

    Are they planting it early, in the hope it will grow?

  9. Dave Pickles
    Coat

    I come to Bury St Edmunds...

    not to praise it.

    1. hplasm
      Thumb Up

      Re: I come to Bury St Edmunds...

      ----->

      nice one!

      1. Tom 7

        Re: I come to Bury St Edmunds...

        Oh beehive.

    2. Will Godfrey Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: I come to Bury St Edmunds...

      After all these centuries, I just wish they'd get on and do the job!

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I come to Bury St Edmunds...

      Barking! (I'm being conecise)

  10. Andy The Hat Silver badge

    Christmas tree decorations are so repetitive - like Eastenders it's just a load of old balls.

    I'm off to have a pine for the fjords ...

  11. Herring`

    Maybe

    it was ordered by Nigel Tufnel.

    Used to work under a clueless head of development called Nigel. "It's not your job to be as confused as Nigel" was a stock phrase.

  12. Steve Cooper

    Southend's tree is more pot than tree - https://www.southendstandard.co.uk/news/17197000.is-it-too-early-for-southends-christmas-tree-to-go-up-column/

  13. defiler

    Given the Christmas angle

    I'm surprised by the lack of Noel...

  14. BinkyTheMagicPaperclip Silver badge

    Plant one..

    My town decided one year to stop buying trees and permanently plant one on a roundabout. It was a bit unimpressive for the first couple of years, but has grown nicely now.

  15. ScarabMonkey

    I guess the residents are still sensitive after their free fireworks were cancelled this year [1] - and now a small tree! What is this country coming to!

    [1] https://www.eadt.co.uk/news/abbey-gardens-fireworks-cancelled-1-5763548

    1. Aladdin Sane

      I blame Brexit and the bloody awful Warsaw Concerto.

  16. Commswonk

    Bah Humbug

    That is all.

Page:

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon