back to article UKIP flogs latex love gloves: Because Brexit means Brexit

The UK Independence Party is flogging multi-packs of rubber johnnies bearing the mug of former leader Nigel Farage. It is also unloading single packs for those more realistic about their chances of bedding someone this weekend or beyond. The prophylactics, being peddled by UKIP’s youth wing - Young Independence – from their …

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  1. BitCoward

    Appropriate seeing as our future prospects have been shafted

    fuck fuck fuckety fucking Brexit.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Appropriate seeing as our future prospects have been shafted

      We'd be way more fucked in 10 years without it. But still, Farage as a prophylactic is just yuck.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Appropriate seeing as our future prospects have been shafted

      Fucking GREAT brexit.

    3. macjules

      Re: Appropriate seeing as our future prospects have been shafted

      On the back: “Made in the EU for UKIP”

      1. codejunky Silver badge
        Joke

        Re: Appropriate seeing as our future prospects have been shafted

        @ macjules

        On the back: “Made in the EU for UKIP”

        Wouldnt that be UKIP throwing them a bone?

    4. Mr Han

      Re: Appropriate seeing as our future prospects have been shafted

      I nearly upvoted you but I couldn't bring myself to change the 69 upvotes. Sorry.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    does not compute

    Sex and Farage in the same sentence does not compute!

    1. John Mangan

      Re: does not compute

      I think the Pauli Exclusion Principle may come into play here.

    2. K

      Re: does not compute

      What do you mean? He's got a grin like a p0rn-star expecting a facial (frowned eyes, with a fake teeth-grin, just waiting for the impact!)

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: does not compute

      Use it as free delay spray. Just have a quick glance, should stop the jesters shoes ringing for a few more moments...

      1. Ken Moorhouse Silver badge

        Re: jesters shoes

        Never come across that one before

        1. illiad

          Re: jesters shoes

          https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=jesters-shoes

          it refers to curling ones toes when you get off!... :)

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: does not compute

      "Sex and Farage in the same sentence does not compute!"

      The value of Farage on a prophylactic is that not only will no sperm pass but also that both parties are put off completely by his visage.

      I take back what I said about him being a complete waste of space, even here he fails to live up to expectations.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    To be honest...

    This is a great idea: I truly hope that anyone who voted for brexit doesn't breed

    1. John Mangan

      Re: To be honest...

      If the demographics are to be believed for most of them it's much too late anyway.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: To be honest...

        racists or dithering old biddies that want ration books back?

    2. Neil Barnes Silver badge

      Re: To be honest...

      Fair point, well made.

      And anyway, surely they mean a 'hard brentry' even though that's possibly a little off-message for the brexiteers...

      1. John Mangan

        Re: To be honest...

        I suppose they do stop immigrants at a border?

        Too much?

  4. BigSLitleP

    Don't need a condom.....

    Farage's face puts me off the thought of sex completely.

    1. msknight

      Re: Don't need a condom.....

      Farage's face puts a lot of people off thought, full stop.... because they seem to stop thinking and believe everything that comes out of his mouth.

      What I can't comprehend is what they then think when, after the event, he denies having said what he said, even when presented with the video evidence of him saying what he said. I mean... you can't be capable of independent thought, and also square away that kind of behaviour.

      Sorry darling, thinking about Farage has given me a headache.

      1. Addanc
        Happy

        Re: Don't need a condom.....

        Examples lies please?

      2. Mark 85

        Re: Don't need a condom.....

        What I can't comprehend is what they then think when, after the event, he denies having said what he said, even when presented with the video evidence of him saying what he said. I mean... you can't be capable of independent thought, and also square away that kind of behavior'

        So he's just like every other politician in the world including the "leader" here in the States?

    2. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      Re: Don't need a condom.....

      Is Farage's face on the actual condom, or just on the packet? I mean, just the packet is bad enough, but - oh dear I feel ill.

      1. Sgt_Oddball

        Re: Don't need a condom.....

        Total dick move.

        Maybe it's a way of showing that Farage isn't a wanker?

        Though with his face on a packet that's what you'll end up being if you pull that out...

      2. Chris G

        Re: Don't need a condom.....

        Farage's face on the condoms would be perfect for back door entry.

    3. Dave K

      Re: Don't need a condom.....

      On the other hand, giving everyone a good fucking and Nigel Farage do go together nicely...

    4. paulf
      Alert

      Re: Don't need a condom.....

      Having a picture of a massive cock on a condom packet does make some sense I suppose?

  5. Simon Harris
    Coat

    Farage condoms?

    Surely brexiters use the withdrawl method.

    Mines the one that doesn't have a pregnancy test kit in the pocket ------->

    1. John Mangan
      Thumb Up

      Re: Farage condoms?

      R.E.S.P.E.C.T

  6. smudge
    Childcatcher

    No need

    Surely he has already f**ked the entire country?

    1. VinceH

      Re: No need

      I thought that was Boris - isn't that why he's now separated; because his wife found out?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: No need

        They both spitroasted the country.

        Anonymous because that's probably the most disgusting comment I've posted here in over 10 years and I don't want it to come back and haunt me like Brexit will to everyone that voted for it.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Presumably for use in case of a Brexit induced "erotic spasm" (or "exotic spresm" for Sir Vince)

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This makes sense really because when I think of who is the biggest cock, farage always springs to mind.

  9. codejunky Silver badge
    Joke

    Ha

    Good idea! Seems to have got the dicks out!

  10. RobertLongshaft

    Remoaners - YOU LOST. LOSERS. GET OVER IT.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      51.89% vs 48.11% is not a resounding victory and its certainly not "the Will of the People".

      1. gotes

        Is BBC Have Your Say making a guest appearance at the Reg today?

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        51.89% v 48.11% is a close percentage

        But it's more than most governments manage to get and they're happy to call it a resounding mandate.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: 51.89% v 48.11% is a close percentage

          It's a bigger percentage than the French got when they voted to join the EU, if one is valid so is the other.

          1. Stoneshop
            FAIL

            It's a bigger percentage than the French got when they voted to join the EU,

            France was one of the founding members of the EEC, which only 26 years later morphed into the EU.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: It's a bigger percentage than the French got when they voted to join the EU,

              France was one of the founding members of the EEC, which only 26 years later morphed into the EU.

              It was actually a founding member of the European coal & steel community which became the EEC 16 years later. 25 years after that they had a referendum on signing Maastricht, to turn the EEC into the EU. They passed that by less than 51% on a 71.1% turnout, so a closer shave than Brexit, yet no-one complains that it should have been rerun the year after just in case the result would change.

        2. Marco van de Voort

          Re: 51.89% v 48.11% is a close percentage

          But it is less to make far reaching, multi government changes, like constitution. One could argue Brexit is just that.

      3. Chris King
      4. Addanc

        From the electoral commission:

        Remain: 16,141,241 (48.1%)

        Leave: 17,410,742 (51.9%)

        Total Electorate: 46,500,001

        Turnout: 72.2%

        Looks resounding to me!

      5. SImon Hobson Bronze badge

        51.89% vs 48.11% is not a resounding victory

        Actually, it's not really 48%, in actual fact only 34.7% of eligible voters voted to remain, with about 27.8% not voting and who have to be assumed to be happy with "whatever the outcome is". So there's an argument that around 65% were happy to leave - 65-35 is a somewhat higher margin !

        But, the remoaners say, "that's not valid". When you can argue that, but if someone really did want to stay, they should have cast their vote - if they didn't then they should be assumed to be happy with the outcome of the vote by those that did actually vote. I think we can be sure that had the vote been similarly tight the other way, remoaners would be quick to point out that less than 35% of voters actually voted to leave.

        1. Joe W Silver badge

          As a non-Brit:

          What was that with the "not a binding referendum"?

          I still don't get it... might be because it is not my mother tongue.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            What was that with the "not a binding referendum"?

            You mean "ask people what they want, and ignore the answer if it doesn't suit you"? That's a very EU-style approach, and is an excellent example of why we want to leave the empire.

          2. VinceH

            'What was that with the "not a binding referendum"?'

            The referendum was supposed to be non binding in that it was supposed to be advisory only - which (oversimplified) means the result would be looked upon as the advice or suggestion of the people. On that basis, the result should have led the government to start looking at the possibility of leaving the EU, all the possible methods and degrees of doing so, before deciding whether to go ahead (or returning to the public to say "these are our options... what do you think?")

            Perhaps more importantly, because it was supposed to be only advisory, it was argued in Parliament that there doesn't need to be a super majority result. The point of a super majority is to ensure there is absolutely no doubt - including a greatly reduced margin for error when taking into account the number of people who didn't bother to vote. A win for either side that is as marginal as that of our EU referendum, when 28% of the people didn't vote, is one that shouldn't be considered a clear win either way - and certainly not one that will change this country in such a fundamental way.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              "The referendum was supposed to be non binding"

              NOT TRUE.

              Cameron changed that with his big mouth.

              He proclaimed the result would stand and be followed, believing Project Fear would work !!!

              Stop editting history to suit your arguments, the internet proves otherwise if you want to check.

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