back to article US, UK cyber cops warn Russians are rooting around in your routers

American and British crimefighters have launched another round of pin-the-tail-on-the-Russians – with a warning that Moscow-backed hackers are trying to subvert the world's network devices. The US Department of Homeland Security (DHS), the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), and the United Kingdom’s National Cyber Security …

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  1. Grikath

    Gosh..... Just 6 months ago it used to be the NORKs...

    Before mr. FattymcFat started, more or less successfully, detonating nukes it used to be the Chinese..

    When the Establishment figured out Asia in general had caught up and could and *would* outcompete them it was the Yellow Menace...

    We've covered about 30+ years of global development in those 3 sentences, and *only* if you look at them through PrUSAian propaganda.

    Anyone else see a pattern, or am I getting Old?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      --->Anyone else see a pattern, or am I getting Old?

      I wouldn't know, I've blocked everything on the Internet except The Register and am down in my Anderson shelter typing this on a tablet powered by a Mamod steam engine and a Sturmey-Archer dynamo.

      1. pɹɐʍoɔ snoɯʎuouɐ
        Pint

        Re: --->Anyone else see a pattern, or am I getting Old?

        "and a Sturmey-Archer dynamo."

        and up vote for the Sturmy-Archer and reminding me to rotate my tyres !!!

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: --->Anyone else see a pattern, or am I getting Old?

        I've also blocked this so called news website. I get all my updates via an encrypted carrier dolphin disguised as a shark dressed as a dolphin to my private volcanic island bunker.

        1. Muscleguy
          Mushroom

          Re: --->Anyone else see a pattern, or am I getting Old?

          My avatar on lots of sites is a picture of me, a dumbo octopus. I of course get my internet by tapping into the USN's deep water listening system. Just for lols I'm quite good at making noises like a Russian nuclear sub.

          I've been hanging about off the Norwegian coast near an optical cable doing my act, you may have noticed. The Admiralty certainly has. It's great fun.

          -> icon because those of us in the Deep will be just fine when you have all nuked yourselves into oblivion. I expect a bit of marine snow from post apocalypse cockroaches shoved into the briny by their fellows. Yum!

      3. Flywheel

        Re: --->Anyone else see a pattern, or am I getting Old?

        powered by a Mamod steam engine

        Crikey! I hope you're allowing some ventilation for that - I seem to remember the meths (pre-crystal type obvs) fumes giving one rather a headache, y'know!

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: --->Anyone else see a pattern, or am I getting Old?

          "Crikey! I hope you're allowing some ventilation for that"

          If I really was down in an Anderson shelter awaiting Armageddon I think the fumes from a few ccs of burning meths would be low on my list of things to worry about. But in fact early in my experiments with Mamod engines I discovered that a small butane torch worked a lot better than those meths burners.

          I do, in reality, possess a Dometic alcohol fuelled marine stove for use in emergency, but it gets used in the garage.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "US, UK cyber cops warn Russians are rooting around in your routers"

      Presumably because they were there first and saw them...

  2. ITS Retired
    Holmes

    Aren't we doing the exact same thing to Russia?

    Of course we are. Also we are doing it to any and every entity that has a router, regardless of laws and countries the router is in.

    Why do you think the Internet is actually so slow? It is not any DoS, it is our own government filling the Internet up with data sucking traffic.

    1. elip

      Re: Aren't we doing the exact same thing to Russia?

      Well of course. How else do you think the US knows Russians are on the routers...they run 'w' in their existing sessions. :-P

    2. This post has been deleted by its author

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I think I'm safe, I've used keyword blocking of bears, vodka and funny hats.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      That’ll keep Corbyn out then.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Could be worse. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-scotland-politics-43784071

        I take neither side. They are all shits.

      2. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

        But you might well attract raging BoJos.

    2. Mark 85

      When you get the "blond hair" block, let us know. The others were easy, this one keeps screaming at my router.

    3. John Smith 19 Gold badge
      Coat

      " I think I'm safe, I've used keyword blocking of bears, vodka and funny hats."

      I'd add "bare chest" and "oiled torso" to that list.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Who hacked the router Angela Merel's data was routed through, oh, yes, that would be the UK

    The kettle's calling... paging pot, paging pot, has anyone seen pot.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    After all, that's where the DRAMA is

    The PFY got warned one night

    By "national authorities" concerning a blight

    Possibly setting up shop in his router

    Behaving like a malevolent looter

    A peril not yellow

    And neither of Mossad

    Not Turkish, not Mobster

    And no NSA wombat

    With smooth voices they told him what exactly to fear:

    "There's Putin rummaging in your Cisco gear"

  6. Kabukiwookie

    FBI has high confidence

    Russians, blah blah, evil, blah, we have proof but we will not show it to you, blah blah.

    Getting tired of this bullcrap.

    Has any of those morons heard the story of the boy who cried wolf?

    Moral of the story is 'Never tell the same lie twice'. (Garak).

    1. KenBW2

      Crying Wolf

      >Has any of those morons heard the story of the boy who cried wolf?

      Doesn't matter, they seem to be winning over public opinion despite their hypocrisy.

      "The people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country." - Hermann Göring

      1. Mark 85

        Re: Crying Wolf

        Let's not forget Goebbels quote: "If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it."*

        *Just one of several variants credited to him

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Crying Wolf

          works the same way in any country." - Hermann Göring....Let's not forget Goebbels quote: ...

          When asking the frequently unasked question "what did the Nazis ever do for us?", I come to the conclusion that the answer is "Gave us lots of useful quotes".

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Crying Wolf

            And they saved The History Channel

          2. Usermane

            Re: Crying Wolf

            And the black uniforms for the Sci-Fi movies and TV series.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: Crying Wolf

              And the black uniforms for the Sci-Fi movies and TV series.

              Autobahns, they did those well.

            2. onefang

              Re: Crying Wolf

              "And the black uniforms for the Sci-Fi movies and TV series."

              Not to mention the black uniforms for Australia's Border Force.

        2. Scroticus Canis
          Devil

          Re: Crying Wolf - @Mark 85

          So that's where the the Orange Prune in the White House got the idea.

          1. Michael Habel

            Re: Crying Wolf - @Mark 85

            My are we clever Mr. Canis.... At leat President Trump loves his Prople, instead of selling them out piecemeal back to the EU.

      2. Michael Habel
        Joke

        Re: Crying Wolf

        Patriotism has no place in the greater new world order dear citizen, or are you some kind of biggoted, islamic-xenophobe, who hates brown ladies who like to dress up as Pacman Ghosts?

    2. Voland's right hand Silver badge

      FBI has high confidence

      How about FBI has EVIDENCE - to satisfy a prosecutor that a prosecution in a court of law may succeed. Real court. Anywhere in the developed world (preferably not USA).

      If they really have it - then, we are talking.

      Until then it is not even kettle paging pot. It is black hole calling a pot black. The best thing to do is not to listen to either one of them.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        At the least, they should be able to check the programming that is on networking devices against the programming that should be on networking devices. That would not necessarily prove who put any additional programming on those devices but could, at least, inform one as to whether there was programming on those devices that shouldn't be on them. I would think that's a fairly standard check, but I've been wrong, many times, before.

  7. Kernel

    What we need to do to counter this threat is .......

    use strong end-to-end encryption.

    Oh, wait - bugger!

    1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
      Pint

      Re: What we need to do to counter this threat is .......

      Brilliant! Have one on me.

      Now where is my one time pad?

      1. Rich 11

        Re: What we need to do to counter this threat is .......

        Now where is my one time pad?

        You left it in the pub. Again.

  8. Kev99 Silver badge

    It would be so much safer if everyone and his brother didn't assume the internet was safe and decided to all their proprietary, sensitive, and confidential on that bunch of holes held together by string.

    1. Michael Habel

      It would be so much safer if everyone and his brother didn't assume the internet was safe and decided to all their proprietary, sensitive, and confidential on that bunch of holes held together by string.

      But, wouldn't that kind of thinking not only crash the likes of Amazon & PayPal, but, also pretty much every other Bank as well?

  9. Dacarlo
    Alert

    Paper cup and a piece of string...

    All this talk of Ruskies attacking routers reminds me there's a few subs out there looking for internerd cables...

    https://www.theregister.co.uk/2015/10/26/russian_cablehunt_recalls_cold_war/

  10. Zog_but_not_the_first
    IT Angle

    Russians are rooting around in your routers

    Er, how would I know?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Joke

      Re: Russians are rooting around in your routers

      because they leave a big note that says "Kilroyski was ere"

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Russians are rooting around in your routers

        because they leave a big note that says "Kilroyski was ere"

        The string to check for is in fact "Килрой был здесь".

        This information provided as a public service to Boris Johnson so he can check his iPhone.

    2. DropBear
      Trollface

      Re: Russians are rooting around in your routers

      "how would I know"

      There's a simple test; just start watching FailArmy videos - if you hear a faint "blyat!" after each gag from your router, it's probably compromised...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Russians are rooting around in your routers

        "There's a simple test; just start watching FailArmy videos - if you hear a faint "blyat!" after each gag from your router, it's probably compromised"

        And if it's in Moscow you can be fined for letting it swear in public.

        Typical bureaucratic mentality: just about everybody says "whore!" when something annoying happens, some people don't like it so make it illegal. That instantly causes people to stop swearing. So yob tvoiu mat, rude people!

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    If anyone shoud know

    ... whether the Russians are in your CISCO router, it should be the NSA.

    1. vtcodger Silver badge

      Re: If anyone shoud know

      Surely there's enough room for both (plus France, North Korea, Iran, ISIS, and the Grand Duchy of Fenwick).

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I think my router manufacturer has been rooting around in my router as well...

    Poisoned DNS, Analytics, Remote Admin etc.

    https://routersecurity.org/bugs.php

    And wasn't it Russias own Kaspersky that caught the US rooting around with the Slingshot exploit?

  13. deadlockvictim

    If home routers are as buggy as hell, even if they are updated and enterprise-grade routers are expensive and possibly more dangerous if configured by someone who is not an expert in them, what should the lay person do?

    Just update the firmware often and hope for the best?

    Turn off the router when it's not being used?

    Treat it like a car — pay a professional many thousands to recommend a good router and have it serviced once or twice a year?

    1. Ochib

      Problem is that most home routers are supplied by the ISP and updated by the ISP.

      When I was a Sky customer, i attempted to replace the rebadged netgear router with something a bit more secure. I asked for my ADSL usename/password and was told that they did give that information to the customers as their service would only work with their routers. A few days later there was a report about all the security issues with sky routers.

      1. Scroticus Canis
        Big Brother

        Problem is that most home routers are supplied by the ISP and updated by the ISP.

        Well I have had two firmware updates from BT* this year, last one on the 7th April, now whether that is a good thing or not I have no idea.

        * presumably British Telecom and not Babushka Telecon :)

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Problem is that most home routers are supplied by the ISP and updated by the ISP.

          Well I have had two firmware updates from BT* this year, last one on the 7th April, now whether that is a good thing or not I have no idea.

          If the router updates are as good as this, then I think I'd be saying "bad thing"

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