back to article Ey-up, mardy Rochdale council has dropped plans for ban on swearing. Thank f$ck!

The northern council of Rochdale has scrapped its plan to fine people £100 for swearing in the town. Despite being the home of Co-operation, Gracie Fields and Lisa Stansfield, business in Rochdale's town centre has gone downhill in more recent years, and the council said it proposed the blue-word ban as part of efforts to …

  1. RockBurner

    anyone else instantly think of another northern town who would love to do this?

    Sunny Scunny. :D

    1. Steven Raith

      Scunny

      Ah, S<censored>horpe, the bane of those suffering with poorly implemented content filters everywhere.

      Steven R

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Can we get rid of local councils yet?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      What and let the likes of May take control...

      Fuck that

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Can we get rid of local councils yet?

      Probably not, but one of the things that upsets me about local government is the tendency to focus on the minutiae and not the stuff that's their job. They've got them selves some publicity, which is lovely for them, but I'm sure the people of Rochdale would prefer them to spend some time filling in some pot holes, that sort of thing.

      1. JimmyPage Silver badge
        Boffin

        Re: focus on the minutiae and not the stuff that's their job.

        If you had read "The Peter Principle", you'd know why this is.

        I can't remember the category, but I recall the example of promoted headmaster who made it his lifes work to organise movement about schools, with arrows, lanes, priority systems, and stopwatches. (Meanwhile the school ticked along nicely thanks to the competent underlings).

        If I had to recommend *one* book to anyone interested in IT, that would be it.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Thanks fuck for that t'ower ked.

  4. 0laf

    I think some ne'er-do-wells screaming obscenities is already well covered by actual laws.

    Rather than bringing in local laws to fine why not have a word in the shell of local plod.

    They might have a rather loud word back about priorities and resourcing but that's something for you fucking politicians to sort out isn't it?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Unenforceable, Can you imagine visitors from Bury trying to stop themselves from saying "this black puddings shite"?

    Any news on the Nativity play? I heard they were still having trouble finding three wise men and a virgin.

    1. Jason Bloomberg Silver badge
      Headmaster

      Can you imagine visitors from Bury trying to stop themselves from saying "this black puddings shite"?

      Or the outburst when fined under 'section 127 - Apostrophe abuse (a) lack of'.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        We dont use apostrophes up north lad and always use the wrong tense.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          We also change singular/plural at a whim. "'e were 6 foot tall."

    2. Mark 85

      Any news on the Nativity play? I heard they were still having trouble finding three wise men and a virgin.

      That seems to be a common problem in a lot of places.... particularly the "wise men" part in government... from local to national.

      Disclaimer: Here in the States. We have one wise man. Ask him, he'll tell you how wise he is.

  6. FuzzyWuzzys
    Happy

    Define obscene. One person's f**k is another's sh*t! One person's c**t is another's...You get the idea.

    My Mum used to hate me using the word "shite" but she happily called people "twats" despite being very well spoken and never swearing. I suspect she never knew what it actually meant and we never corrected her as we found it funny when she said it!

    1. Jason Bloomberg Silver badge

      Twats

      I suspect she never knew what it actually meant

      Perhaps because it means different things in various places in the UK, from a rather innocent "idiot" upwards.

      I still remember that old airline joke which ends; "I'd rather have your TWA tea".

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Twats

        "Perhaps because it means different things in various places in the UK"

        I think that is what OP was kinda hinting at...

    2. Adrian 4

      Don't blame her for disliking 'shite'. It's a horrible word, trying to disguise itself as another for what ? To reduce offence ? If you mean shit, say shit.

      1. Terry 6 Silver badge

        Adrian 4

        I dunno why you got the two downvotes. Saying "shite" instead of the good honest "shit" is undoubtedly pretentious. And, by lengthening the vowel, removes the force of the word as an emotional emphasiser.

        1. Sir Runcible Spoon

          I think Shite is the past-tense for shit, as in 'it were shite'. Then again, grammar was never a Northerner's strong point.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            You can stick your grammar up your arse, along with your fancy London ways.

            "It's shite" is a perfectly acceptable usage - A northerner.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Simple solution

    All those imbeciles have to do, and this goes for every local authority, is bring back free parking if they want to attract more people to the town centre

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Simple solution

      Can't do that. More government is always better. More rules are always better.

      If we ban or inconvenience cars from areas of dubious utility, people certainly won't drive a bit further to more useful places - they'll spend 2 hours on the bus to potter around the charity shops.

    2. Martin an gof Silver badge

      Re: Simple solution

      bring back free parking

      That's what they said around here, when roadworks scheduled to last a year at a well-known choke-point pretty much gridlocked the town centre.

      No, what would help in this instance is not taking 12 months to do a job that really shouldn't take longer than 12 weeks. Oh, and not scheduling to do it in the run-up to Christmas!

      M.

    3. TonyJ

      Re: Simple solution

      "...bring back free parking .."

      A good few years ago, out local council sold off land to be built on and shut down the park-and-ride because that's where the ran it from.

      So fast forward to a few years ago and they decided for a couple of months over the Christmas period to make all the council-owned car parks free.

      You couldn't move. Even more than the usual Christmas rush.

      After the free period ended, they rather sneakily increased parking from 90p per hour to £1 and since then it's gone up to around £1.50 on average.

      And funnily enough, even around this time of year you never seem to struggle to get parked. Even at weekends.

      Of course, they've had other great ideas like pricing market stall holders out of bothering to come as they can't make enough to afford the pitch.

      Seems like they are utterly clueless for the most part about things like this.

    4. Wilseus

      Re: Simple solution

      "bring back free parking if they want to attract more people to the town centre"

      Northampton Borough Council has introduced that at weekends.

    5. Hans Neeson-Bumpsadese Silver badge

      Re: Simple solution

      "bring back free parking if they want to attract more people to the town centre"

      Northumberland did that a couple of years back, with mixed results.

      "Paid-for parking is damaging our businesses by discouraging people from coming into town and buying stuff from us" said the local traders.

      The council introduced a parking disc system (buy a disc for a one-off quid and use it every time for free-of-charge parking).

      The local traders then complained "Free parking is damaging our businesses - people come to town, park for free all day and jam up the car parks, so there's no flow of people during the day."

      Damned if you do, damned if you don't

  8. Christoph

    The response to this is well known

    If they were to bring in this rule then people will simply use alternate swear words. The usual response is to use the names of the councillors as the required obscenities.

    1. Tikimon
      Angel

      Re: The response to this is well known

      "If they were to bring in this rule then people will simply use alternate swear words"

      Or alternate languages entirely! I already do that as a way to threaten and disparage computers in front of my users. I found too many who knew what the common French or German cusses meant. So now I unleash the vilest rants imaginable in Hungarian and Russian and nobody is the wiser. Except for two of my users who asked to learn a few choice phrases for personal uses, gotta love 'em.

    2. Roj Blake Silver badge

      Re: The response to this is well known

      Drokk, grud, stomm, spug, etc

    3. Pedigree-Pete
      Thumb Up

      Re: The response to this is well known

      @Christoph. That would be some kind on Cock…ney Rhyming slang then. PP

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Belgium!

  10. lglethal Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Little laws created by little people

    Anti-social parking? I assume that means parking illegally? Isnt that what you have parking inspectors for? Oh wait, you cut them from the last Budget didnt you? Hmmm... Well I'm sure the Police wont mind being parking inspectors as well. What they want paying for doing that too? And they cost more then a parking inspector? hmmm lets just pass some more laws that doesnt cost any Money does it?

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    GMP

    > "It seems the Greater Manchester Police also felt they had better things to do in the town had reservations about the ban."

    Oh? News to a friend of mine, just try swearing in their general vicinity and see how interested the wankers get.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Holmes

    You fell for it

    Based on their canned response to that guy (presumably you Brits know who he is, because I sure don't) who said he was going there, I think this was a media exercise all along.

    Councilor 1: How do we get more people to visit our fucking town?

    Councilor 2: We need to advertise ourselves and the huge goddamn investment we've made in our town centre.

    Councilor 1: That costs too fucking much, our bloody citizens won't let us raise their taxes to advertise the town!

    Councilor 3: What we need is free publicity, what can we do that will get us on the fucking news?

    Councilor 2: I know, we should make up a crazy law that everyone will think is bollocks!

    Councilor 3: But won't that just make people think we're cunts and stay away?

    Councilor 1: Not if we later drop the plans and get even more free fucking media!

    Councilor 2: But what the fuck kind of shitty law can we pass that will guarantee we get that fucking attention?

    Councilor 4, also the local vicar: I have an idea...

  13. John Sager

    Ey up? EY UP??! They don't say that in Rochdale, At least not when I were a lad there. That's an expression from 't other side o 't hill! We didn't demean oursels wi' expressions like that.

    1. Charlie Clark Silver badge

      Yeah, but didn't ya knoo that all Northerners tak the same?

      I'm goin oot wi'ma wippet, ye ken?

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Fitbin!

  15. Terry 6 Silver badge

    Trouble is I can't think of any reason to go in to Rochdale (or remain there). It's close enough to nearby Bury, Bolton, Salford, Trafford Centre and of course you can just go into Town ( Manchester). Rochdale was pretty much left behind by the economic tide a generation or more back. Even when I lived near there, in my younger years, I seldom went there. The swimming baths used to be decent though. And it has heritage - in the shape of the Rochdale Pioneers and the Co-op.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      It is a bit of a dump, but the Trafford Centre? Are you mad?

  16. Alan Edwards

    Automate it

    Maybe one of the councillors watched Demolition Man :)

    The 3 Sea Shells would be next though...

  17. teknopaul

    just a thought

    Maybe if they didn't make life shit for the kids they might stick around when they grow up?

    Banning children is a crazy idea. Its presumption of guilt at its worst.

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