back to article Lordy! Trump admits there are no tapes of his chats with Comey

President Trump has, in a tweet-burst today, backtracked on his earlier menacing claim that he may have secretly recorded his meetings with then-FBI boss James Comey. ...whether there are "tapes" or recordings of my conversations with James Comey, but I did not make, and do not have, any such recordings. — Donald J. Trump (@ …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    is this because of the constant negative press covfefe?

    Sure he doesn't have the recordings, he gets the Russians to do that for him.

    This is sarcasm by the way but it could actually be true and that's the scary part.

    I'm not sure what's real anymore, I think I'll just sit down and watch Horizon later about the end of the universe with a nice cup of tea and a couple of hob nobs. That'll take my mind off all this.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Do you want your soma served dissolved in a cold martini, sir?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Sure he doesn't have the recordings, he gets the Russians to do that for him.

      This is sarcasm by the way but it could actually be true and that's the scary part.

      No it couldn't, because that's neo-Mccarthyist nonsense. When the Soviet Union collapsed the world realised just how weak a regime it really was. Russia is significantly weaker still, by comparison, today.

      But by all means, carry on believing that Trump is a Russian plant and that the mastermind Vladimir Putin managed to remotely reprogramme the brains of tens of millions of Americans to vote for him. After all, the world is oh so much simpler to comprehend when there's a scary bogeyman on which to rally against and apportion blame.

      1. PhilipN Silver badge

        I believe it could. Russia is strong in IT. Sure some of their best people have gone to Israel but there are plenty left behind.

        This is the New Great Game.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Mushroom

        Neo-Mccarthyist nonsense

        When the Soviet Union collapsed the world realised just how weak a regime it really was. Russia is significantly weaker still, by comparison, today.

        I think you are confusing economically weak with militarily, politically or technologically weak. Whilst Russia has serious economic problems, it is still a powerful country controlled by a powerful leader. I don't see people writing off North Korea as threat just because it has a GDP smaller than Trinidad's.

      3. aqk
        Devil

        In comprehension, simplicity is not just the only thing, it's EVERYTHING!

        After all, the world is oh so much simpler to comprehend when there's a scary bogeyman on which to rally against and apportion blame.

        Thank goodness we KNOW that this isn't the case with Hillary! She is indeed a servant of the anti-christ, and, with her husband, is amassing a great fortune through the the crooked Clinton Foundation that soon will be turned over to Satan; perhaps with a goodly portion going to Vladimir Putin.

        Why is she still running free? LOCK HER UP, Donald! Before it's too late!

        1. Florida1920

          Re: In comprehension, simplicity is not just the only thing, it's EVERYTHING!

          LOCK HER UP, Donald!

          Whataboutism is so boring.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The Truth?!

    Given his track record of mendacity, idiocy, buffoonery, etc., there is no simple verification of that the contents of these tweets is actually true. This also applies if the tweets were written by a lawyer for him.

    1. Someone Else Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: The Truth?!

      How can you tell Trump's lying?

      He's breathing.

      1. Mark 85

        Re: The Truth?!

        I'll take your Trump bash and add: "It's not just him. It's ANY politician."

      2. oldtaku Silver badge
        Black Helicopters

        Re: The Truth?!

        > How can you tell Trump's lying?

        Trump is beyond lying. That implies some sort of sense of right and wrong, fact and fiction.

        He just says whatever he wants to be true right this minute - it's pure bullshit, not even truth or lie, and he probably even believes it at the moment. Ask him tonight and you'll get a different answer that's just as true for him at this minute.

        Why does it matter? Well, you can at least deal with liars once you identify them. You certainly can't believe Trump saying there aren't any tapes - there might be tapes but now they're inconvenient so he is willing them out of existence.

        1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

          Re: The Truth?!

          "there might be tapes but now they're inconvenient so he is willing them out of existence."

          He only said he didn't make any tapes, nor does he have them. That still doesn't preclude someone else making a recording and keeping it at Trumps behest, either specifically in this case or simply as a matter of course. It does all rather sound like lawyer-speak and out of character for a TrumpTweet.

    2. Graybyrd
      Facepalm

      Re: The Truth?!

      My son (brainwashed by drive-time talk radio) has simplified all this for me:

      ALL the news is fake; there is nothing credible. Not only that, but the TRUE news is never reported. Big Liberal Media suppresses the truth. But if it WERE reported, all of that new news would be fake, too.

      There is a Deep State conspiracy. The Radical Liberal Leftist Industrial-Military-Socialist Elite Intelligence Operatives are conspiring against Trump. And succeeding.

      Trump is being stymied by a Minority Cabal of Recalcitrant Hard-Headed Republicans in the US Congress who are obstructing the Trumpian vision of Perfect Healthcare Delivery, Total Employment for All, Equitable Taxation, Right-Sized Government and a Return to Greatness for America.

      Wake me when it's over. It's time now for my nap.

      1. SolidSquid

        Re: The Truth?!

        That's gonna be one hell of a nap if you're not waking up until everything is over

        1. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

          Re: The Truth?!

          That's gonna be one hell of a nap if you're not waking up until everything is over

          "hey la, Rip van Winkle's got nothing on me, I'm a-going to sleep for a whole centuree.."

          (Bizarre things cross my mind on a friday afternoon. Must be the celebratory dead-cow[1]-inna-bun)

          [1] Actually dead-chicken-inna-bun today. But from the usual DCIAB vendor.

      2. Alan Brown Silver badge

        Re: The Truth?!

        "Wake me when it's over. It's time now for my nap."

        Sure, Mr van Winkle. Just make sure you're comfy.

    3. Charlie Clark Silver badge

      Re: The Truth?!

      It looks like his counsel has finally woken up to this fact. Nothing about the destroyer rammed off Japan or Syrian plane shot down.

    4. Roq D. Kasba

      Re: The Truth?!

      Considering he will lie about the weather in front of many, many scores of inauguration attendees and many more on TV watching live, there is clearly no filter or reference to fact whatsoever in his head.

  3. Version 1.0 Silver badge
    Unhappy

    It only gets worse

    I'm starting to think that it's so bad over here that if Travis Kalanick were to run for President of the United States things would actually improve and everyone would be happy again.

    What a friggin' train wreck.

    1. Blotto Silver badge

      Re: It only gets worse

      We only just dodged a likewise duff candidate this side of the pond, making promises he had no intention of paying for just to give the incumbent a bloody nose.

      When you have 2 poor choices then there really is no choice at all.

      I do wonder what kind of scary hell we'd be in if Hilary / Jeremy had won their respectives.

      1. Rich 11

        Re: It only gets worse

        making promises he had no intention of paying for just to give the incumbent a bloody nose

        You must have enjoyed yesterday's Queen's Speech, which St Theresa used to make it clear she was not going to go ahead with everything she'd promised in her election manifesto.

        If you can lambast one candidate for what you personally think he wasn't going to do, surely you'd feel compelled to lambast the candidate who has declared that she isn't actually going to do what she said she'd do?

        Do you feel cheated? Do you feel that your vote was gained on false pretences?

        1. Bernard M. Orwell

          Re: It only gets worse

          "surely you'd feel compelled..."

          Careful there, it almost looked for a second as though you expected logic and reason from a right-wing voter and we all know that doesn't work.

          1. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

            Re: It only gets worse

            expected logic and reason from a committed-to-any-platform voter

            There FTFY.

        2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

          Re: It only gets worse

          "You must have enjoyed yesterday's Queen's Speech, which St Theresa used to make it clear she was not going to go ahead with everything she'd promised in her election manifesto."

          Remember that the Queen's Speech only covers 2 years of a 5 year Parliament (or so May hopes) so on that basis you wouldn't expect all the manifest to be in it. Whether the Parliament will last for 5 years and how long May will remain PM are matters that remain to be seen.

          Remember also that without an overall majority what a government actually achieves is going to be a compromise between the parties which form the consequent government and there's always going to eb something that gets dropped; just ask the Lib-Dems.

          And last but not least "Events, dear boy, events".

          1. Charlie Clark Silver badge

            Re: It only gets worse

            Remember that the Queen's Speech only covers 2 years of a 5 year Parliament

            It's supposed to be a longparliament to try and quell problems with a separate bill next year. But I think it was fairly clear that the Queen expects to be back soon enough, just hopefully not in Royal Ascot Week.

            1. Alan Brown Silver badge

              Re: It only gets worse

              "it was fairly clear that the Queen expects to be back soon enough"

              I wonder if she will dress as a Euro flag again though.

      2. gandalfcn Silver badge

        Re: It only gets worse

        "I do wonder what kind of scary hell we'd be in if Hilary / Jeremy had won their respectives."

        I suggest it would probably be far better that the hell hole lunatic asylum you no doubt voted for, didn't get and now gave to live laughing stocks on both sides of the Atlantic.

        People thought Bush/Blair was bad. Don the Fart/Bedlam May could be far worse.

      3. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

        Re: It only gets worse

        making promises he had no intention of paying for

        Actually, given the politician involved, he may well have an intention to pay. Whether he could[1] is an exercise left to the reader..

        [1] Of course, he personally probably wouldn't pay any of it. As with all governments, it's the taxpayers[2] that do.

        [2] By which we mean, anyone with some cash that the government is able to grab. Which includes pretty much everyone other than the utterly destitute.

        1. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

          Re: It only gets worse

          "By which we mean, anyone with some cash that the government is able to grab. Which includes pretty much everyone other than the utterly destitute."

          It does, however, exclude the really rich.

    2. aqk
      Angel

      Re: It only gets worse. Travis?

      What you need is Travis Bickle! He would clean things up! And free that poor abused Melonomia!

  4. We're all in it together

    Oh well

    Bring back George Bush all is forgiven

    1. We're all in it together

      Re: Oh well

      To be precise Dubya

      1. kain preacher

        Re: Oh well

        Dubya is like an you guys shitted on me why? Oh and think America owes Dan Quayle an apology for calling hims stupid and ignorant of politics.

      2. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

        Re: Oh well

        I think Afghans and a lot of Iraqis and Syrians want to discuss this "forgiveness" thing.

  5. bombastic bob Silver badge
    Trollface

    Hook, line, and sinker!

    I think the press has been TROLLED, successfully. By Trump.

    1. MiguelC Silver badge

      Re: Hook, line, and sinker!

      You do realize you're talking about the president of the Us of A, not about some punk kid in his parents' house bedroom, do you?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Hook, line, and sinker!

        "You do realize you're talking about the president of the Us of A, not about some punk kid in his parents' house bedroom, do you?"

        If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck... it's usually a Donald.

        1. We're all in it together

          Re: Hook, line, and sinker!

          If it walks like a duck l'orange and talks like a duck l'orange ... it's definitely a Donald

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Hook, line, and sinker!

        You do realize you're talking about Donald Trump, not some politician in his speechwriter's room, do you?

      3. Someone Else Silver badge

        @MiguelC -- Re: Hook, line, and sinker!

        You do realize you're talking about the president of the Us of A, not about some punk kid in his parents' house bedroom, do you?

        And the difference is what, again?

        1. Blank Reg

          Re: @MiguelC -- Hook, line, and sinker!

          The difference is that the punk kid would probably make a better president.

        2. Stoneshop
          Devil

          Re: @MiguelC -- Hook, line, and sinker!

          And the difference is what, again?

          Cheeto Benito has multiple bedrooms, of which at least one is demonstrably not his parent's.

          1. SolidSquid

            Re: @MiguelC -- Hook, line, and sinker!

            Also one for him and, until recently in an entirely separate city, one for his wife

  6. Ucalegon
    FAIL

    Tape Worm

    Tapes or no "tapes" he certainly gets my backup.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Tape Worm

      your backup of the tapes?

  7. John Smith 19 Gold badge
    Holmes

    "He's not a professional politician. "

    He is however a bully and a bluffer.

    You may not like Comey, but he called the D's bluff.

    Too bad the best alternative the 'crats could come up with was Hilary.

    Too bad the US system seems to make any kind of thrid party virtually impossible.

    1. Ucalegon

      Re: "He's not a professional politician. "

      I'd change US system to any first past the post democracy. FPTP blocks most rational choice for voters beyond the 2 main parties. If only there were another way....

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: "He's not a professional politician. "

      > Too bad the best alternative the 'crats could come up with was Hilary.

      Too bad the best alternative the 'pubs could come up with was Ted Cruz.

    3. eldakka

      Re: "He's not a professional politician. "

      Too bad the US system seems to make any kind of thrid party virtually impossible.

      That's the ground-state of any "first past the post" voting system. Having more than 2 parties, certainly more than 2 viable parties, is a temporary aberration in that election system, which will then make its way back to the ground-state over a few election seasons.

      1. Alan Brown Silver badge

        Re: "He's not a professional politician. "

        The problem with FPTP and its inherent bias towards a two party system is that you end up with polarised politics and policies which lurch violently from government to government.

        Proportional representation (done right) means that government is generally by concensus, the central ground dominates and the extreme policies of either side simply don't get through.

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