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Terry Pratchett's self-written documentary to be broadcast in 2017

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I hope that Death welcomed him with the words:

GREETINGS FRIEND.

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Re: I hope that Death welcomed him with the words:

"AT LAST, SIR TERRY, WE MUST WALK TOGETHER.

Terry took Death’s arm and followed him through the doors and on to the black desert under the endless night.

The End."

If you don't mind, I'm off to sit in a corner somewhere.

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Re: I hope that Death welcomed him with the words:

I still start to well up when I read that.

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MUCH MISSED STILL

REST IN PEACE SIR PTERRY

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Pint

66 really was too young. Nightwatch was probably his finest moment. Where ever you are Sir Terry, this one is for you.

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With Terry writing the words and Paul Kaye playing him it should provide plenty of laughs. I would still rather have him back and writing. I guess I should go back to the beginning and read them all again...

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... Again.

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I am now reading Pratchett to my boy and have fallen in love with his writing again.

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Yes, like Wodehouse you must read Pratchett aloud to really savour his creative genius. I recently started my wife on him that way and she got totally hooked despite not being a reader or a fantasy fan. The same books I had read long ago suddenly took on a whole new dimension under the spell of the spoken word. Silent reading misses too many of the nuances he put into his work, particularly in the dialogue.

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Pint

The Spoken Word does add a new perspective to the writing, but at the cost of missing out on his facility with punctuation, typeface, and even page layout.

GNU Sir Terry Pratchett

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Don't leave out "Where's My Cow".

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Back in Octarine perchance?

RIP. Read everything he wrote. Will always want for more.

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Literary critics

I guess we all know the old saying about eunuchs; they know how it's done, they get to watch it being done, they comment on how it's being done...they want to do it...but they can't.

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Re: Literary critics

Years ago I was hanging wallpaper in my house, an acquaintance who had dropped by was criticising my work. I shut him up with ' Those who can,do. Those who can't, criticise!'

He left.

How many great writers have been slated by 'expert' critics?

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Happy

Re: Literary critics

Years ago I was hanging wallpaper in my house,

Slightly OT, but you reminded me of something I heard on a Radio 2 Chris Addison show years ago:

"...that's why the first thing we do, when we move into a new house, is to take the previous idiot's wallpaper down and put ours up - we're marking our territory.

Now, here's a little tip. Take the idiot's wallpaper down, but before you put yours up - go to Homebase, buy a tin of blood-red paint, and write on your wall with the paint "I WILL KILL AGAIN". Wait for it to dry, then put your wallpaper up.

Now... you never actually get to see the punchline of this joke, but you do get a lovely warm feeling in about 5 years time when you hand the keys over..."

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Literary critics

"I guess we all know the old saying about eunuchs; [...]"

They were employed in the Ottoman harem because they wouldn't produce any offspring that would be confused with the Sultan's. Otherwise they were usually fully functioning sexually.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Literary critics

For more information about that topic try:

http://www.reuters.com/article/us-china-eunuch-idUSTRE52E06H20090316

China's last eunuch

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Re: Literary critics

Eunuchs were 'employed' more than just in the Ottoman court. I believe there were several hundred thousand at least in Chinese history. In fact, most ruling systems in the historical period had eunuchs, and probably lots before that.

It's just too easy to create them...

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Coat

Re: Literary critics

It's just too easy to create them...

Easy? Hardly. To make one really takes balls.

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Happy

Re: Literary critics

Responding to my own (well, Chris Addison's) wallpaper anecdote above - if anyone's in the slightest bit interested, the comedy program in question was "The Ape That Got Lucky", first aired 25th August 2005. Very, very funny indeed, with surreal tales of bubble-wrapping penguins, academic rivalry, and how "little dolphin" tattoos morph into Moby Dick as the tattoo-ee ages. I've just listened to it again and it's still laugh-out-loud fresh over a decade later.

It doesn't seem to be on iPlayer or YouTube any more, unfortunately, but I'm sure there are copies around for those that seek it.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Literary critics

Not sure why my original post received so many down votes. For the purpose of accuracy I was being very specific about eunuchs in the Ottoman Empire who only had their testicles removed. That was different from a Chinese practice where the penis was also removed.

See 18th century contemporary quote by Ali Seydi Bey in Philip Mansell's "Constantinople: City of the World's Desire, 1453-1924"

https://books.google.co.uk/books?id=LrnvC98bNSoC&pg=PT103&dq=mansel+constantinople+eunuch+seydi+bey&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwid0_bu_77RAhUCKsAKHRVJDiIQ6AEIJTAA#v=onepage&q=mansel%20constantinople%20eunuch%20seydi%20bey&f=false

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Re: Literary critics

Otherwise they were usually fully functioning sexually.

Depends on when and how they were cut - there are various degrees of snippage. Some cultures just removed the testes, other remove the whole root and branch[1]..

[1] Which tended to have much lower survival rate - the ancient Persians used this method (generally) and the surgery was done mostly on very young boys. It also uncluded the use of a small reed to keep the urethra open until the immediate are had mostly healed. If they didn't then the children tended to die quite quickly because they couldn't urinate. Not nice.

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Re: Literary critics

[shakes head in disbelief]

So real humans (and presumably they were ones with balls of their own) actually sat down and thought about the fatality rate and instead of thinking "well colour me surprised" they actually went away and did some research to figure out how to do it less fatally.

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Re: Literary critics

Otherwise they were usually fully functioning sexually.

I think you have missed the point of the saying about literary critics. The point is that writers do produce "children" - their books - while most literary critics produce essays that are promptly forgotten. Eunuchs know exactly how babies are produced, but they don't beget them even though they may be able to sustain an erection.

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Pint

Read the additional interview material in Good Omens

Good Omens - at least, certain editions of it* - contains a set of interviews with TP and Neil Gaiman, in which they describe how they came to meet & collaborate. It's almost as funny as the book itself and well worth reading if you haven't already. A hat is involved.

(The icon is a pint of scumble, foolishly poured into a rapidly-dissolving glass.) -->

*As is typical - and actually mentioned by TP and NG in their interviews - I have owned at least 4 editions, 3 of which have been loaned out to people and never returned. My first few copies of the book didn't include the interviews and additional material, but the last one I purchased (in Oregon) did. Maybe only in the recent US editions?

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Re: Read the additional interview material in Good Omens

A PINT of scumble???!!

I pity your liver, kidneys, teeth and skull at the end of that! Don't fancy the eventual hangover from being that knurd either!

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Happy

Re: Read the additional interview material in Good Omens

@A K Stiles A PINT of scumble???!!

S'alright, I took the precaution of putting a lining on my stomach with mutton & clootie dumplings (with slumpie), first. Should protect against anything up to and including scumble.

Also. Multiple exclamation marks... you do recall what that's a sign of, hmm?

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Bittersweet

The very mention of the master's name still brings a lump to this old fool's throat.

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Clacks

Thanks, El Reg, for your X-Clacks-Overhead.

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2015/03/18/sir_terry_pratchett_http_header/

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Re: Clacks

I wonder how many servers are sending that?

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Re: Clacks

*Raises hand*

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DJV

Re: Clacks

Several of mine as well.

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Re: Clacks

Mine too

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Re: Clacks

And me!

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Headmaster

Warning: This post contains pedantry

How is it a documentary, when it has someone playing the role of the person being documented?

This has to be either a dramatisation of a true story, or a reconstruction... it cannot be a documentary.

Still going to watch it :D

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Warning: This post contains pedantry

Possibly a "docu-drama"?

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IT Angle

"How is it a documentary, when it has someone playing the role?"

Because Kaye won't be playing the part of the OFIAH, he will be speaking the words of someone who no longer can. It's no less documentarian than the programmes on World War I where diaries of dead soldiers are read out.

(The IT angle: Pterry famously used a six-monitor display rig, and said the only reason he didn't use more was because he couldn't figure out a way to hook them up.)

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Re: "How is it a documentary, when it has someone playing the role?"

"(The IT angle: Pterry famously used a six-monitor display rig, and said the only reason he didn't use more was because he couldn't figure out a way to hook them up.)"

He once told me - the first time I was in the presence of those monitors - "People ask me why I've got six monitors. I tell them 'It's becasue there isn't room for eight!'"

He also said he'd considered getting a web cam on top of them so he could see whoever was standing on the other side...

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Unhappy

"unexpectedly poignant"

You're watching the brain of a man who was a great satirist and whose work was loved by millions gradually turn from porridge (as Alan Turin put it) to blancmange.

I think most people who aren't actual psychopaths would find that quite poignant.

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Re: "unexpectedly poignant"

And who had an astonishing memory.

Among the 10s of thousands of people he met, I was fortunate to do so twice. Across 2 continents and 10 years apart. The second time (in Australia), he remembered me, where we were the first time (Silicon Valley), what we were doing (I bought him sushi lunch because his publisher agent was a useless c*nt and wouldn't get him anything, and then took him to a Fry's for gadget shopping). He remembered things I'd forgotten - name of the shop, other people there.

It was gobsmacking.

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Facepalm

Re: "unexpectedly poignant"

@Michael Hoffmann The second time (in Australia), he remembered me, where we were the first time (Silicon Valley), what we were doing (I bought him sushi lunch because his publisher agent was a useless c*nt and wouldn't get him anything, and then took him to a Fry's for gadget shopping).

I am genuinely in awe. Your interaction with him was far more noteworthy than mine.

'Twas a bookstore (Waterstones?) in Chester, somewhere around 1995. He was on a signing tour. A gangly, pimply bean-sprout of a student who had no social abilities whatsoever hesitatingly put a copy of the book in front of the Great Man and stammered out his name "David <Surname>".. to which came the gentle, oh-so-tactful reproof, "Just 'David', surely?". Cue GPBSS exiting stage Right, having a fit of conniptions at having interacted and made a fool of himself with so exalted a person.

Twenty+ years and much therapy later I can bear to remember it.

Lost the signed copy, of course. Lent it to a "friend" and never got it back, the barsteward. You Know Who You Are (but I don't).

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Re: "unexpectedly poignant"

Had a few pints with him back in the 90's, and even got invited for a curry once. His daughter's a really nice person to talk to as well.

My wife still has her alt.fan.pratchett(hedghog) t-shirt. Well, it was mine originally until a washing accident turned it pink.

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And a quote from Wyrd Systers for next week

Somewhere deep inside his mind, somewhere beyond the event horizon of rationality, the sheer pressure of insanity had hammered his madness into something harder than diamond.

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Anonymous Coward

OT: Neil Gaiman's "Stardust" was broadcast in two parts on R4 recently. You can see why his collaborations with Terry worked.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b07xs23j

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Stardust

I enjoyed that thoroughly on a long train journey over Christmas.

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A man is not dead

Whilst his name is still being spoken.

The Auditors will be most displeased with Sir Pterry's way of having others speak his name so often.

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Pint

Re: A man is not dead

And so Sir Terry lives on in the overhead, bouncing from one end of the Grand Trunk to the other,

and in also in L-space of course, or wherever else orangutans say "Ook",

and in the hearts of all his wit, and deep humanity touched.

...

And now will have to go and get a new handkerchief. I'll raise a glass once more later

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Re: A man is not dead

The Auditors can take a running jump of a frozen bridge.

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Mushroom

Re: A man is not dead

Just get Miss Susan to toss chocolates at them...

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The first time i met the great man (on a signing tour for The Amazing Maurice) he signed "To Chris, have you got your potato? Terry" and he was amazed and delighted when i revealed i DID have my potato round my neck :D

I cried for hours when he died, and and tearing up again at this memory. I miss you.

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