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The Zucker Mister Social Club: Facebook's daddy wants to be your friend, for realsies

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Fuck me, if Trump can do it... (shudders)

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So what you're getting at is that when he says "so I'll need to travel to about 30 states this year to complete this challenge" we can assume it means this map gives a reasonably clear indication of which 20 he's been and which 30 he needs to go to. Seems reasonable.

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Can you imagine the crowd going wild over Zuckerberg's zingers? Not so much. Being a man of the people doesn't mean you have to love everybody, that's wrong. But you do have to love somebody, and Zuckerberg doesn't love anybody. I feel like his marriage is a strategic business move to leverage the China situation. If Zuckerberg told a joke I would be like gee, I wonder who wrote it.

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Anonymous Coward

Can you imagine the crowd going wild over Zuckerberg's zingers?

That's what I thought about Trump too, but as far as I can tell, literally *everything* is for sale for the right price so I think it's worth dropping any assumptions based on previous experience.

That said, I must thank Zuckerberg for creating a low even below Trump. Just when we thought Bush was the lowest we could get, along comes Trump. Now, even before that one is inaugurated, along comes Zuck. I wonder where this game of ethical limbo will end.

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Facepalm

"Every year I take on a personal challenge to learn new things and grow outside of my work. In recent years, I've run 365 miles, built a simple AI for my home, read 25 books and learned Mandarin."

Is general literacy really in such a parlous state that reading 25 books is considered an achievement?

Dear Gods, there's no hope...

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Now now, he might have read 25 variations of a Holy Book. I hear the Mahabharata is a cracking read.

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Is general literacy really in such a parlous state that reading 25 books is considered an achievement?

Depends on the books, depends on the person.

I'm doing alright if I make it to 12/yr - about 1 a month if I'm just reading a chapter before bed. I'd like to read more, but that would involve not doing other activities that I enjoy. On the one hand I've cracked through Caves of Steel in a week, were I to embark on War and Peace or Pillars of the Earth, I might struggle to crack double figures for 2017!

It's probably not a bad number for someone who is playing with AI, learning Mandarin and running Facebook.

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I've read maybe one book in the last 20 years, until a couple of months ago when I was encouraged to rediscover them. I'm reading 2 together now and have just finished a third

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I'm good at reading the first chapter, but then I think, gee if this guy is so great, how come he didn't put the information in a youtube video so people would actually give a shit? Where are his fans on youtube? If no one is talking about this on youtube, do you have any right to call it important? No.

Reading is such a pain, you have to hold the book, or the kindle, and then your eyes have to move move move and I can't stand it. Its manual labour for your eyes and neck. There must be a better way and it's youtube.

Sorry nerds.

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Anonymous Coward

Is general literacy really in such a parlous state that reading 25 books is considered an achievement?

God no, not actual book, comics. He's an ex nerd, remember?

:)

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One of the most famous people in the world.

Of course he needs more privacy than most people. I think like a couple of hundred people in the world know who I am, perhaps 1,000 max. This guy is known by something like a billion people around the world. Out of that number, a fair few probably want to meet / criticise / friend / kill him, so it's understandable he wants a bit of privacy. I think Joss Stone probably wants more privacy too, and deserves it.

Personally, I'd never want to be famous. What a curse.

Oh, vvv ... there's the downvote button, for anyone struggling to find it.

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Re: One of the most famous people in the world.

"Personally, I'd never want to be famous. What a curse."

Don't worry, I don't know you.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: One of the most famous people in the world.

Personally, I'd never want to be famous. What a curse.

You appear to overlook that Zuck is part of the scam that enables people to become famous without them have a choice in the matter. Their lives are sacrificed on the great altar of social media needing eyeballs to sell sh*t, so I'm personally against Zuck having the sort of privacy he denies others.

IMHO, the word "Zuck" really starts with the wrong letter.

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Re: One of the most famous people in the world.

"I think like a couple of hundred people in the world know who I am, perhaps 1,000 max."

That and 100,000 corporations.

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Re: One of the most famous people in the world.

... and as corporations can be people...

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Zuck the Cuck? Noooooooo. Carly Fiorina, the previous politico-fascist to try it got shot down when people remembered her HP days. When Zuck the Cuck threatened to fire the person who wrote All Lives Matter on the employee *open, free* message board, we knew right then that something was really rotten at the core of Facebook.

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He may do better quietly buddying up with someone to get into a tla type position. After all, he already has his own spying network

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He's got a chance

After all, like every other politician he considers us plebs to be dumb fucks.

The only difference is that he cannot pretend he never said that.

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Big Brother

Dear Mr. Zuckerberg, ...

... I'd rather not have you find out what I'm "living, working and thinking about the future", given what you and your company will likely do with that information.

Also, you may call me old-fashioned, Mr. Zuckerberg, but I'm rather fond of that "social norm of the past" that we call privacy. I know, you're more of a "sharing is caring" type of personality, but since you've read so many books*, maybe you've come across the phrase "Speech is silver, silence is gold", and to that respect I prefer to only publish my thoughts if I think that (a) they're worth publishing or (b) somebody wants to read them. Preferrably both. As such I'm not exactly part of the target group of your services, but still you silently collect data about me whenever I visit a website that carries one of your Like buttons; you do that without my consent and against my expressed (DNT) will. But yet you think that somebody seeing your house from the outside is an unacceptable invasion of privacy.

And, Mr. Zuckerberg, I suspect that I'm not alone with these views.

So maybe you want to reconsider your aiming for a carreer in politics (unless you're planning to do this solely to improve your business. Doing that seems to have lost its stigma recently.) Instead, read another 25 books. I have a few suggestions: "1984" maybe. Or "Fahrenheit 451". Call me if you need more.

Best regards,

A. N. Onymous

* Were these really books, or rather "books"? You know, with staple binding? Probably not, since these might contain nudity, and that is of course completely unacceptable, even if it's just a photograph of a many hundred years old sculpture in a public space. Hate speech, death threats, that's all OK - but you have to draw the line somewhere. And bronze genitalia, that's clearly too much.

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Thank (deity of choice)

He is only visiting US states,

Z in Ibiza: Will you be my friend?

Me: No. Fuck off you moron.

Trouble is most of the people I know live farcebook, so they would probably! Welcome him.

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Anonymous Coward

No choice

Zuck has to get into politics to stop his shitty privacy invading website from being regulated.

Furthermore, if he makes it to president he can replace social security numbers with "Login using facebook".

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Re: No choice

Zuck has to get into politics to stop his shitty privacy invading website from being regulated.

As the income from advertising trends to zero, following Gresham's Law, he has to find a new source of funding. What better than to merge it with the CIA? He could even present it as a budget saving.

If I saw Zuckerberg coming, I'd hide my face and run.

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Anonymous Coward

I wish I was rich,

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Anyone who uses Facebook has already waived their right to privacy.

And anyone who says, acts and lives like Zuck, can also waive their right to privacy.

I wonder if I could save enough to buy a small island...

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Pirate

the LAST thing we need...

Great. The LAST thing we need is *YET* *ANOTHER* techno-wealthy guilt-motivated "silly valley" LEFTIST invading the political sphere. Only THIS time, it would be more OVERT than COVERT.

The 'guilty rich'. Always ready to "make that sacrifice". And *MAKE* *THE* *REST* *OF* *US* *SACRIFICE* *EVEN* *MORE* !!! [to selfishly assuage their personal guilt]

And he'd just be ANOTHER puppet for SOROS anyway...

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Re: the LAST thing we need...

Um, Mr Bob, you do realise that a lot of FULL CAPS is the general sign of someone off the scale weird, don't you?

And what on earth has Mr Soros done that you think he has puppets?

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Anonymous Coward

Re: the LAST thing we need...

Um, Holler, you do realize that Bob is a little, perhaps a tad, maybe just a bit bombastic, don't you?

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Alien

Re: the LAST thing we need...

...a lot of FULL CAPS is the general sign of someone off the scale weird...

No, that's shouting.

Random Capitalization is the mark of One who is Truly living in a Different Universe.

[e.g.: amanfrommars]

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Umm

Well, at least he won't make odd statements about the "age of computer".

Three hundred sixty-five miles is not terribly far for a man his age, though I one should consider his responsibilities as well. I'm not sure what "learning Mandarin" really means--can communicate with native speakers who know no English? Can read newspapers or complicated texts? And as someone remarked above, one would have to know what the 25 books were: is The Critique of Pure Reason representative or The Art of the Deal more like it?

I am not sure that he has the personality type for electoral politics. Blustering tends to play well, analysis less so.

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GTFO

Trump is one thing... but Zuckerberg is a punk-ass sperg kid lacking in real world experience and common sense, who through a freak accident of history got rich off his harebrained scheme to stalk girls whilst in college.

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sod off

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Whats the issue....

...it's not like he has a huge stack of information on what people do and talk about, what their opinions are whilst at the same time having the ability to manipulate one of the largest sharing platforms in the word?

First they came.....

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