back to article Jersey sore: Anchor rips into island's undersea cables, sinks net access

Internet speeds on the UK island of Jersey have been slashed – literally – after a ship's anchor destroyed three submarine cables linking the isle to the British mainland. Broadband speeds on the Channel island immediately slowed to a trickle after the data cables, owned by telco JT, and the voice traffic cable, owned by ISP …

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  1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

    Not so expensive

    So we are looking at 7-figure numbers, max?

    1. Brian Allan 1

      Re: Not so expensive

      And who picks up the bill for this negligent act? I hope it is the owner of the tanker.

  2. CanadianMacFan
    FAIL

    Redundancy

    The whole point of having multiple cables for redundancy is kind of lost if you lay then on the seabed where an anchor can cut all three in one go.

    1. Kernel

      Re: Redundancy

      Deciding where to lay a submarine cable involves a bit more than 'just here looks ok."

      As well as having the right beach conditions, the sea bottom between the landing sites needs to be suitable, existing cables need to be avoided if at all possible and you also need to avoid having some US TLA tell you "You can't put that there - no I'm not going to tell you why!"

      1. Lotaresco
        WTF?

        Re: Redundancy

        "you also need to avoid having some US TLA tell you "You can't put that there - no I'm not going to tell you why!""

        Yes, because the CIANSAFBIWHY? have jurisdiction over international waters and the European continental shelf <rolls eyes>.

    2. JetSetJim
      Facepalm

      Re: Redundancy

      Reminds me of a story of a company putting in optical fibre and the plan calling for redundant links. They did have them, but they were unfortunately all in the conduits. Then someone dug up the road with undue care and attention and all hell broke loose.

      1. JetSetJim

        Re: Redundancy

        Oops - typo:

        "all in the same conduits"

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Redundancy

          That sounds just like a University in Southampton, where all the safety of life, fire, disabled toilet and building alarms all depend on an off site it departments optical fibre piecemeal network, along with all the now Skype only telephones and normal it. Burning buildings down is a speciality activity of their Electronics and C SCI depth, during one outage the only reason the control room knew there was a fire alarm was down to the solitary security guard patrolling seeing a building emptying and going to investigate!

    3. Dale 3

      Re: Redundancy

      These three all lying together were probably more for capacity than redundancy. The link to France was the redundancy part, and it's doing as intended.

    4. TonyK

      Re: Redundancy

      In the very same sentence, Mr McDermott makes it clear that he is talking about the redundancy provided by the backup connection via France.

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

  3. Chewi

    A few years ago, they might not have noticed much as ADSL speeds were never fantastic as far as I recall. Now much of the island has FTTP so I guess the effect will be more pronounced. Not that my parents would see any difference.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's fine.

    I'm right here on the island and haven't noticed any ill effects - we still have 1 of the 4 links to other countries, one to France. It's not as bad as we feared, and a ship is already in place to splice one of the broken cables back together.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: It's fine.

      I'm right here on the island and haven't noticed any ill effects

      Presumably you're only streaming French art house cinema? It will be your neighbours looking for hot US West Coast silicone who are finding things on a go slow.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "on the UK island of Jersey"

    Oh dear, you're lucky the inhabitants of that Crown Dependency are so laid back, and separated from the UK by a fair amount of sea...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

      "the UK island of Jersey"

      I don't think it is. It's a actually a British Crown Dependency.

      Very, very big difference, which will no doubt upset the UKIP and other empire believers.

    2. diodesign (Written by Reg staff) Silver badge

      Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

      Honestly, we kinda just wanted to see what reaction we'd get.

      C.

      1. Hans 1
        Paris Hilton

        Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

        >Honestly, we kinda just wanted to see what reaction we'd get.

        "Jersey, the island we nicked from the French," would have been better ... why do they have cables to the UK anyway ? France is much, much closer!

        icon: J'ai vu Paris (Charles Aznavour)

        1. Uberseehandel

          Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

          Quote - "Jersey, the island we nicked from the French,"

          and there I was thinking the Channel Islands belonged to the Normans, who nicked England from the English.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

            From the English or from the Saxons, who weren't English either, AFAIK?

            1. phuzz Silver badge
              Thumb Up

              Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

              "England", or "English" come from a corruption of Angland, or 'land of the Angles', of Anglo-Saxon fame.

              So the Normans nicked it off the English, who had nicked it off the Britons who had... well, you get the idea, we're a land of immigrant mongrels.

              1. Anonymous Coward
                Anonymous Coward

                Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

                "well, you get the idea, we're a land of immigrant mongrels."

                The Normans were other Vikings who had invaded the area now called France - and then settled down to rule parts of it.

                "Norman" presumably drives from "Nord Man" = "North Man".

                1. alferdpacker

                  Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

                  mmm, no, I think it's just that they were all called Norman

            2. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

              "From the English or from the Saxons, who weren't English either, AFAIK?"

              England = Angle Land.

              And it does amuse me the number of people who seem to think that before the Angles & Saxons rocked up that what was to become England was a land filled with blond haired blue eyed pure bred celts all speaking some ancestor of Welsh. Perhaps they've forgotten about the Roman Empire which ruled Brittania for FOUR HUNDRED years. Any pure bred celts had long since be consigned to the corners of the british isles by the time Rome left and a lot of people would have been speaking some version of Latin.

              1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

                Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

                "Any pure bred celts had long since be consigned to the corners of the british isles by the time Rome left and a lot of people would have been speaking some version of Latin."

                The general archaeological view seems to be that most of the Romano-British population were the descendants of the pre-Roman Iron Age population who had simply adopted elements Roman culture. The colonia, however, would have added retired legionaries although these were recruited from across the empire.

                1. Anonymous Coward
                  Anonymous Coward

                  Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

                  "The general archaeological view seems to be that most of the Romano-British population were the descendants of the pre-Roman Iron Age population who had simply adopted elements Roman culture. The colonia, however, would have added retired legionaries although these were recruited from across the empire."

                  Quite so, but over the course of 400 years you're going to have enough relationships (consensual or not) between romans and the locals that by the time the last legionary left its highly unlikely that many people at least in the south of england were 100% celtic especially given many non british roman citizens probably stayed behind anyway.

              2. Commswonk

                Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

                Any pure bred celts had long since be consigned to the corners of the british isles by the time Rome left and a lot of people would have been speaking some version of Latin.

                Tu sunt rectam, amicus meus.

              3. Dexter

                Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

                The Celts only arrived sometime in the Iron Age (probably around 500BC), displacing the Britons who were already here. So they are incomers as well. The previous (non Celtic, and probably non-Indo-European) language still survives in some place names, but not much else.

                Doubtless there were other waves of migration before that.

                1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

                  Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

                  "Doubtless there were other waves of migration before that."

                  Especially when what we now call Doggerland was still above the waterlevel and what is now the UK was just an outcropping of the rest of europe. There doesn't appear to be any archaeological evidence of any border controls either so it was just a free for all as far immigrants were concerned. Anyone brave enough to hitch a lift on a Mammoth was in.

                  1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

                    Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

                    Sure is Alt-Right in here.

                    I approve of this (somewhat)

            3. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

              Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

              "From the English or from the Saxons, who weren't English either, AFAIK?"

              Pretty well the same thing - Anglo Saxons. They weren't Britons, however.

              And, of course the Normans were Vikings who'd nicked a bit of France from the French.

            4. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

              Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

              English or from the Saxons, who weren't English either

              Angles, Saxons and Jutes - all slightly different shades of the same old Germanic swatch..

              (BTW - The Saxons referred to themselves as English [or the equivalent Saxon spelling of the word] so I think we can quantify them as English..)

              Not Modern English though - we are a thoroughly mongrel[1] race and proud to be so - those of us who are not UKIP/BNP nutters anyway.

              [1] My surname is probably Norse-derived, my family roots are in Forest of Dean even though my Dad was born in Yorkshire, my mother is half-Welsh and was born in Dorset. My wife has a blood type that is most common on the Iberian Peninsula [even though she is Cornish/Devon] whilst mine is the prototypical Celtic.

              1. This post has been deleted by its author

                1. Lotaresco
                  Meh

                  Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

                  "Stewart Lee"

                  There are people who think Steward Lee is a comedian and a separate group who can count up to 20 without removing their socks.

              2. Anonymous Coward
                Anonymous Coward

                @crazyOldCatMan

                "those of us who are not UKIP/BNP nutters anyway."

                Whilst the BNP may be obsessed with race, UKIP is concerned with EU control and immigration numbers and nothing to do with race. Unless you're saying that the Polish (for example) are a different race to the English. If so which race are they? As someone who voted UKIP I'm afraid I'm a bit tired of the same old tar with the same brush BS one gets from those of the left because its too much effort (or too hard) for them to differentiate. It would be like me saying Polly Toynbee is no different to Stalin simply because they're both on the left.

                1. Dazed and Confused
                  Black Helicopters

                  Re: @crazyOldCatMan

                  > Whilst the BNP may be obsessed with race, UKIP is concerned with EU control and immigration numbers

                  Pah, we're all bloody immigrant, we're all bloody Africans when it comes down to it.

                  Back to the topic of the story, are we sure it was an accident?

                  Or were these sub-sea cables dug up as Jersey wasn't monitoring their populations browsing habits properly and now there a chance to splice in some proper monitoring equipment?

                  Mine's the one with the black helicopter and tin foil hat in the pockets.

                  1. Anonymous Coward
                    Anonymous Coward

                    Re: @crazyOldCatMan

                    "Pah, we're all bloody immigrant, we're all bloody Africans when it comes down to it."

                    We're all bacteria if you go back far enough, so what? That reductio ad absurdum argument is just a lazy dismissal of a situation that is clearly too complex for people like you to discuss.

                    1. Dazed and Confused
                      Facepalm

                      @boltar

                      > situation that is clearly too complex for people like you to discuss.

                      Hardly, I just happen to enjoy winding racists up, that's all.

                      I also enjoy winding up extremist white supremacist Christians by reminding them that Jesus was an Arab Jew and so quite unlikely to be blue eyed and blond.

                      Now I wondering which camp of people I enjoy winding up you'd put yourself in. I suspect neither of the above.

                      Now have a nice day

                      1. Anonymous Coward
                        Anonymous Coward

                        @dazed and stupid

                        Wind up? Not very good at it are you. Is the standard issue lefty mewling "waaacist" really the best you can do? Have another go mate.

                        Oh , and Jesus was a judean who spoke Aramaic and Hebrew you clueless gimp, not an Arab.

                        1. Dazed and Confused

                          Re: @boltar

                          I really believe that is the first time in my life anyone has suggested that I'm a lefty. I'm impressed by your originality, but you clearly didn't read what I wrote. You normally write quite sensible things here. What I had said which you failed to read was that I suspect that you wouldn't consider yourself of either of those things.

                          Please read carefully before picking up the flame thrower.

                          1. Anonymous Coward
                            Anonymous Coward

                            Re: @boltar

                            "Please read carefully before picking up the flame thrower."

                            Note to self - don't post late at night when tired. :)

                2. Anonymous Coward
                  Anonymous Coward

                  Re: @crazyOldCatMan

                  If you read the Guardian, you'll learn that Stalin was right wing because he was a naughty boy.

                  The fact that he was actually left wing has nothing to do with it.

                  1. TeeCee Gold badge
                    WTF?

                    Re: @crazyOldCatMan

                    ...The fact that he was actually left wing...

                    Personally I reckon that at the extremes, "left"and "right" are indistinguishable anyway. Totalitarianism vs. Libertarianism is where the important action is and on that scale, Hitler and Stalin are one and the same politically.

                    Greatest giggle right now is the Corbynite "Momentum" types describing anyone who disagrees with them as a Nazi. I find the idea of being called a Nazi by a bunch of frothing anti-Semites, who also seem to think that threats of extermination and kicking people's windows in are valid political strategies, somewhat ironic.

                    1. Anonymous Coward
                      Anonymous Coward

                      Re: @crazyOldCatMan

                      Stalin ran a centrally planned economy. However you slice it, that's left wing.

                      1. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

                        Re: @crazyOldCatMan

                        "Stalin ran a centrally planned economy."

                        As did Hitler, or technically Göring as he was in charge of it, when setting up the Vierjahresplanbehörde in 1936.

                        BTW, Nazi is shorthand for Nationalsozialismus.

                        No, I think I'll go with the 'it's totalitarianism vs libertarianism' argument as posted above. Assholes are assholes, any which way you dress them up.

                        1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

                          Re: @crazyOldCatMan

                          That's because Hitler was left wing. Only crazy-arsed nationalistic left wing.

                          The big irony of the 20th century is that this was successfully buried under the wreckage of the Monster Battle of European Socialist Regimes.

                        2. Anonymous Coward
                          Anonymous Coward

                          Re: @crazyOldCatMan

                          We know Hitler was left wing too, but that he was right wing is even taught in schools, so I wasn't going to touch that one.

                          Arseholes are arseholes, yes, but my original point was that on the Graun, one must be described as rightwing to be deemed an arsehole, whether that's accurate or not.

              3. Lotaresco
                Coat

                Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

                The Jutes were famously stiff, rather abrasive but very hard wearing.

              4. H in The Hague

                Re: "on the UK island of Jersey"

                "My wife has a blood type that is most common on the Iberian Peninsula [even though she is Cornish/Devon]"

                In the Iberian Peninsula you can find some interesting Celtic artefacts, v similar to what I've seen in Ireland. And one of my Scottish friends who emigrated to Portugal discovered that some of the music they play on their bagpipes there is very similar to what he grew up with.

                Guess we're all immigrants, just some more recent arrivals than others.

                1. This post has been deleted by its author

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