back to article No super-kinky web smut please, we're British

Film censors in the United Kingdom will be able to ban Brits from accessing websites that stream especially kinky X-rated videos, if a proposed change in the law gets up. The Digital Economy bill, which is due to penetrate the statute books in early 2017, is set to include a provision that will allow the British Board of Film …

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  1. Winkypop Silver badge
    Holmes

    Yep, that'll work

    Not.

    1. Dazed and Confused

      Re: Yep, that'll work

      Yeah, like I noticed that the "Autumn Statement" didn't include a budget increase for the BBFC to allow them to employ 50,000,000 new censors, which is just what they'd need to start with if they want to start monitoring porn sites on the Internet.

      Still it could solve the unemployment crisis at a stroke (or has that been banned?)

      1. Paul 195

        Re: Yep, that'll work

        "at a stroke"?

        fnar fnar...

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Yep, that'll work

        @Dazed and Confused

        Re: "Still it could solve the unemployment crisis at a stroke"

        I do have this increasingly horrible feeling that following the driverless vehicles / robotics / machine learning / AI revolution that is coming and will lead to mass unemployment, the State will be employing vast numbers of the population as informers on their neighbours. In return for the very generous offer of basic income... :/

        And before you think it won't affect you, have a look at this study of job types:

        https://public.tableau.com/views/AutomationandUSjobs/Technicalpotentialforautomation?:showVi

    2. John Smith 19 Gold badge
      Childcatcher

      Re: Yep, that'll work

      OH, this is that SEL Tory MP who still can't manage to set her browsers access controls and demands ISP's do it for her.

      IIRC she wanted every internet set to have an age rating.

      She thought you could use those gambling sites to do so. They looked pretty trustworthy to her.

      TOTC because, you know, that the usual excuse for this BS.

    3. MyffyW Silver badge

      First they came....

      First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out—

      Because I voted against Corbyn.

      Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out—

      Because I thought I was "management".

      Then they came for the Jews and the Muslims, and I did not speak out—

      Because I was neither a Jew nor a Muslim.

      Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.

      1. Semaj

        Re: First they came....

        It's a fair enough sentiment (though a bit early for a Godwin). The thing is - all this rubbish started years ago with Labour (maybe before), was carried on by the coalition and now the Tories have taken it on - so there's no one left to vote for. UKIP fall for the "protecting children" bullshit too and who knows what horrendous rules the greens would come up with. Protests have been held - and ignored so that doesn't work either. What else can be done?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: First they came....

          "who knows what horrendous rules the greens would come up with."

          Well this Green, and many I know, object to this kind of censorship (as well as the extension of online snooping powers). A further issue --- not addressed by Tor and VPNs --- is the disproportionate impact on independent producers in the UK, who, perhaps ironically, are often women (which seems at odds with the supposed "feminist" arguments for censorship). There is also a clear risk of mission creep: what is to stop mandatory age verification for adult material blocking access to information on sexual health (which is clearly at odds with "protecting children")? I don't know any Green who would consider that to be a good idea, or the idea of extending the gatekeeping powers of BBFC (whose classifications were originally just advisory), or granting them a monopoly on age verification. The Open Rights Group has expressed concern about privacy risks with the proposed age verification. That organisation was founded by a former officer of the Green Party of England and Wales.

          Whatever else you may think of them, in the context of censorship and mass snooping at least, those with Green sympathies seem to be among the few voices of reason.

          (Anon, reluctantly, because... politics.)

      2. Danny 2

        Re: First they came....

        First they came for the Socialists, and I did not spank out

    4. This post has been deleted by its author

      1. adam.c

        Re: Fcuking Nepotism!

        Maybe because

        Karren Brady (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karren_Brady)

        is not the same person as

        Karen Bradley, Secretary of State for Culture, Media and Sport

        https://www.gov.uk/government/news/new-blocking-powers-to-protect-children-online

        Just a thought - feel free to borrow it as you seem a bit hard of thinking...

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Fcuking Nepotism!

        I think you're confusing the current Culture Secretary, Karen Bradley, with the West Ham United and former Apprentice sidekick to Lord Sugar, Karen Brady.

        More info here:

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Secretary_of_State_for_Culture,_Media_and_Sport

    5. Naich

      Re: Yep, that'll work

      Hmm... it's not working. Better blacklist all sites and then whitelist the ones that are OK. Expect the bill for this in about 2019.

    6. g e

      Keeping harmful material from young minds?

      Put the Dail Mail on the top shelf then.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Keeping harmful material from young minds?

        Hopefully this will help:

        http://www.accuracast.com/news/social-media-7471/stop-the-hate-print-advertising/

    7. Mutton Jeff

      Re: Yep, that'll work

      don't understand why they're getting so anal about it....

    8. FuzzyWuzzys
      Facepalm

      Re: Yep, that'll work

      Of course it will!

      "Hello anoymous web user, are you 18 or over? ( Y or N)"

      "Well I'm a sexually frustrated 15 year old, I'd better tick "N"...."

      ====

      Working from a statute that was codified in 1958?!? FFS! Did they have anything more adventurous than "missionary" in 1958? There are 12 years old boys at my daughter's school showing each other hard-core porn on their mobiles FFS! Despite having "the talk" with our daughter when she was 9 years old and maintaining an open dialog about anything to do with sex, she still ended up looking at smut when she was 12 ( which lead to more sit down talks! ). Kids will find a way to get to see it, no matter how hard to want to ban it, and here's a clue for you censors, the more you ban something the more people want to see what it is and why!

      1. Danny 2

        Re: Yep, that'll work

        In 1958 even missionary was illegal in Britain - by definition you had to go to the colonies to do that. We used to reproduce asexually, by sharing a cup of tea then sitting on a toilet seat your spouse had just sat on. However until 1986 spanking leaving a mark wasn't just legal, it was mandatory,

      2. This post has been deleted by its author

    9. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Yep, that'll work

      This is the worst showing of Daily Mail Politics in quite some time. Put simply you find something that the readers of the Daily Mail are likely or have expressed an opinion of disgust about. Then you make campaign promises/moves to make it law/enact law etc. It doesn't matter that the law is unworkable or easy to circumvent that's not the point, you're showing the voter that you're tackling the big issues. This from a government that allows as did the previous ones to allow unencrypted soft core pr0n to be broadcast on the DTT platform. Yes TelevisonX (and I think one other?) is broadcast in the clear and is easily found with either a Nokia receiver or a USB stick and software.

      Sadly this will doubtless have repercussions on all types of sites from those that are full on pr0n to those that have very little questionable on them baring something arty and erotic. Hell Youtube has people uploading the odd video nasty every now an then that lasts for a few minutes/hours/days before it's removed. So we're banning Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, Youtube, Dailymotion, Bing Videos etc. Some UK pr0n producers have had to site themselves overseas to get round existing restrictions and some have fought the regulators see ATVOD vs Pandora Blake for an example of this.

      One of my favourite examples of these things getting out of hand was in 2011 as found on El Reg

      http://www.theregister.co.uk/2011/01/25/ignorance_of_scottish_pr0n_law_no_defence/

      A spokesman told us: "We do not publicly disclose our prosecution policy in relation to specific offences as to do so may allow offenders to adapt or restrict their behaviour to conduct which falls short of our prosecution threshold."

      They added that any such information would also be exempt from any attempt to tease it out by using Freedom of Information legislation.

      On the plus side if there is one, it may encourage more people to get more computer literate and start using VPN services etc.

  2. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

    Obligatory Joke

    A man books into a hotel and says to the desk, "I'm a Christian and I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled."

    Replies the clerk: No you perv, it's just normal

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Rather transparent..

    All these people want is a steady supply of kinky stuff to watch. Rating it is just an excuse IMHO.

    :)

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Rather transparent..

      That will be half the reason.

      Let's not forget that the BBC censored the Sex Pistols because Johnny Rotten wanted to blow the whistle on Saville. Sometimes censors really are bad people.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Rather transparent..

        Sometimes censors really are bad people.

        FIFY :)

        1. Dave 15

          Re: Rather transparent..

          Censors get the power from somewhere so it is not just the censors that are bad people.

          The government should be forced to keep an up to date list of ALL banned websites for everyone to see (the list that is), then we would know where to surf with our vpn :)

  4. MrDamage Silver badge

    I'm sure

    They'll have as much success stopping the grumble flicks from being viewed, as they have had in stopping movie and music piracy in the UK.

  5. A Non e-mouse Silver badge

    Between this and RIPA, I can see the use of TOR & VPNs in the UK sky-rocketing.

    1. You aint sin me, roit

      As they seem to want to make criminals out of anyone seeing anything that you might not want your servants seeing, they are bound to force people into using Tor, VPNs and proxies. In fact most internet savvy teens are already using them...

      Hopefully one brave ISP (!) will refuse to censor sites (they are hardly "qualified" and won't want the burden), and take it to the courts, if only to point out the idiocy in stopping people seeing acts that they can legally do. Most acts with age limits (smoking, drinking, driving... ) are fine to watch if you are too young to actually do them.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        I must admit I absolutely *love* the idea of people flocking to VPN services as a way to avoid local censors spotting anyone watching dodgy stuff. The last time I looked, most of these operators were actually based in the US, so all these VPN users were doing was giving US authorities insight into their online activities.

        Next time you want to use a VPN operator, just check how careful they are with your personal information. Especially check where they physically host their services or you might as well not bother.

        1. Adam 52 Silver badge

          Even the BBC was promoting VPN services (nordvpn) yesterday.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Next time you want to use a VPN operator, just check how careful they are with your personal information.

          Why would you gve a VPN operator genuine personal information??

          1. Tom Paine

            How else are you going to pay for it?

          2. rh587

            Why would you gve a VPN operator genuine personal information??

            1. If it's paid-for, then you need to pay...

            2. If it's free, there is the question whether they log traffic - they can see your real IP and your destination. If they log that, then your PII is at risk. Worse yet if they're really unscrupulous and do DPI to skim for e-mail addresses or other PII to sell on. You're basically setting yourself up for a deliberate MITM to get around a greater evil.

            Do your research.

      2. rh587

        Hopefully one brave ISP (!) will refuse to censor sites (they are hardly "qualified" and won't want the burden),

        I'm not sure if this new legislation is intended to apply to all ISPs or if it will only be applied to the largest.

        Andrews and Arnold famously don't filter. The big ISPs all have (optional) filtering in place anyway for parental control, and mandatory filtering infrastructure for court orders (like the Pirate Bay block and the Child-Porn blacklists they get from CEOP). Most of those are implemented via straight up DNS blocks, so I can see them just stuffing their new blacklist in there so they can say they've complied whilst the rest of us carry on using 8.8.8.8 or OpenDNS uninhibited.

        I doubt many of the ISPs will want to go to the expense of pursuing a judicial review when they can just wing it with a gimped DNS "block" and not really inconvenience customers whilst also ticking the government's boxes.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Aaisp do provide an option for filtering when you sign up. If you say you want filtering they tell you to find a different ISP.

    2. Ouch

      VPN

      They won't ban VPNs as business rely on them, but they can block sites advertising them as a way around the blocking. So you will need a VPN to buy a VPN soon.

      1. Arthur the cat Silver badge

        Re: VPN

        buy a VPN

        Buy a VPN? This is el Reg, people round here fire up OpenVPN on a small cloud server. If you can't be bothered to roll your own there are already precanned ones. I found this in about 10 seconds

        OpenVPN Access Server

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: VPN

          Yep. Two Raspberry Pis and Bob's your uncle. Or your Auntie in the case of iPlayer.

        2. Arthur the cat Silver badge

          Re: VPN

          OpenVPN Access Server

          To save anyone else pointing out my mistake, that needs a licence. Damn. OK, take a look at this.

        3. C Montgomery Burns

          Re: VPN

          I use this script to put OpenVPN on a new server. Dead simple, and secure enough for me.

          https://github.com/Nyr/openvpn-install

          1. Ouch

            Re: VPN

            The act will allow blocking of sites that offer/promote bypass technology so Github could be in for a block. Truly chilling...

  6. A Non e-mouse Silver badge

    Why is it that watching someone else perform a legal act is illegal?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Beats me.

      The minimum age for pornography is several years above the age of consent in most of the USA making it illegal to both watch and record something that is perfectly legal to do.

      1. Dave 15

        ah, now I understand

        Why people have curtains and light switches... if its dark they cant see what they are doing so they cant get done for illegally watching the act they are legally performing :)

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: ah, now I understand

          >Why people have curtains and light switches... if its dark they cant see what they are doing so they cant get done for illegally watching the act they are legally performing :)

          And if someone is sat on your face, you don't even need to turn the lights off!

    2. NightFox

      So, it's fine for Theresa May to s**t all over us, but not for anyone to watch?

    3. MrXavia

      Because laws are stupid, because the lawmakers cannot think logically.

      1. Tom Paine

        Oh, it's /logical/, all right -- it's consistent with the existing old-school porn regulation, which makes one sort of sense. The alternative would be level down the regs so videos of the various legal-to-do-but-not-see stuff become legal. You may very well think that the latter is a more sensible approach, and perhaps you'd be right, but it's not inherently more /logical/ than the alternative.

        </captain_pedant>

        1. Dr. Mouse

          The alternative would be level down the regs so videos of the various legal-to-do-but-not-see stuff become legal.

          You are correct, that would be the logical way to do things.

          However, it would have all the Mumsnet/Daily Mail etc. crowd up in arms because "The government is letting our kids watch dirty porn*, won't somebody think of the children!"

          * "Of course, it isn't the responsibility of the parent to educate their children and ensure their wellbeing, that's too difficult, so we want the govt to do it for us. Then we can just sit back with a nice bottle of wine and let the TV and internet raise and educate our children."

    4. Ken Hagan Gold badge

      "Why is it that watching someone else perform a legal act is illegal?"

      It's for symmetry with all those cases where watching someone else perform an illegal act is legal.

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