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Microsoft kinda did OK this quarter – but whatever, Wall Street loves Satya Nadella

J. R. Hartley
Silver badge

Windows Phone

The only reason they bother is so they can keep claiming their 10 quid per Android handset sold. It's 'patently' obvious.

Mine's the one with the S7 Edge.

P. Lee
Silver badge
Big Brother

>Nadella reported that Windows 10 users now number 400 million, and more than 200 billion hours of use time has now been logged by Redmond.

Because that isn't creepy, is it?

--

You better watch out

You better not cry

You better not pout

I'm telling you why

SatyaNad is coming to town.

.

He knows when you are gaming

Knows every spelling mistoke

He knows if you are goofing off

So be good for goodness soke

.

You'd better not copy, *his* Windows

But you couldn't say "no", not by clicking "close"

SatyaNad is coming to town!

.

He's murdered his own channel

Sucks all into the cloud

All your base belong to him

Clicked "Upgrade" - or not, he's allowed

.

Oh, Tel Emetry is so much fun!

He even knows,

When you're browsing pron

SatyaNad is coming to town

.

I must confess a secret

I installed Win10 too

But only for B.Y.O.D.

It ain't *my* data - Woohoo!

.

Oh, I've kept it in,

Its own little VM

I gotta laptop, with loads of mem,

SatyaNad is coming to town

.

I'm not sure what he's thinking,

When apps are in the cloud,

There'll be no need for Windows t(h)en

And no casual dev's allowed.

.

He'd better watch out,

And he'd better cry,

AWS is eating his pie,

Maybe SatyaNad is leaving this town!

P. Lee
Silver badge

^ Feel free to join in, like the "old time religion" verse collections from The Time Before The Web.

Steve Davies 3
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Inspired

have an upvote for that. Made my day.(having a root filling later)

tiggity
Silver badge

Not sure why people downvoted that, I enjoyed it!

Anonymous Coward
Anonymous Coward

re Downvote

anything critical of Microsoft seems to get downvoted these days. The post is a wonderful parody of MS today. Sad that the downvoters can't take a joke. This post may well attract some negativity as well.

Doctor Syntax
Silver badge

Re: re Downvote

"anything critical of Microsoft seems to get downvoted these days."

Not quite anything. When the news is something particularly egregious they seem to keep their heads down. But it was informative that the first vote on your post was a downvote, so have an upvote for balance.

hplasm
Silver badge
Meh

Never mind the quality-

feel the width!

druck
Thumb Up

Up the Cloud

I hope Microsoft's cloud does exceptional well, as eventually Microsoft will be the only one actually running Microsoft software.

Eddy Ito
Silver badge

... as popular as a rattlesnake in a piñata.

Now hang on, I can see that catching on. Instead of an election we could just give Clinton and Trump each one stick and let them go at the piñata simultaneously. We'll keep the rules simple, no antivenin allowed, survivor wins.

Wait, I just realized the poor rattlesnake doesn't stand a chance being the least venomous of the three. I guess it's back to the caged death match idea then.

joeW

Can we not have one comment section that doesn't devolve into Merkin politics?

Queasy Rider

Merkin politics?

Right, we want Brit politics, Euro politics etc.

armyknife

Cloud Cuckoo Land ?

See Title.

Expat-Cat

2017?

or did I miss something?

Champ

Re: 2017?

You missed something. Microsoft, like many US companies, runs it's financial year from July to June. Strictly speaking they in 2016/2017, but they just refer to it as 2017.

JJKing
Coat

P. Lee, thank you for the laugh :thumbsup: . It immediately brought to mind this old gem.

Windows 95 is 32 bit extension for a

16 bit graphical shell for an

8 bit operating system originally written for a

4 bit processor written by a

2 bit company that doesn't care

1 bit about their customers.

I guess that makes me old even in dinosaur years.

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