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MYSTERY RADIO SIGNAL picked up from BEYOND our GALAXY

Space is big, my brain just ain't

" it put out energy equivalent to the Sun's daily output in a few milliseconds" I can't even begin to pretend to grasp this sort of number. Perhaps if it were stated in El Reg standard units?

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Mushroom

Re: Space is big, my brain just ain't

That's a tough one because El Reg doesn't have a standard unit for energy, but it does have a unit for mass. The font of all (dis)information Wikipedia says the energy output of the sun is 9.192×1010 megatons of TNT per second, which is 7941888000000000 megatons of TNT per day, which is 7941888000000000000000 tons of TNT per day, which is... drumroll please...

the energy of 1.89e+24 Jubs of TNT exploding, in just a few milliseconds!

I think we can all agree that is more Jubs than anyone can safely handle in one go (no matter how much you might want to).

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Re: Space is big, my brain just ain't

"The Sun's daily output" IS an El Reg standard unit.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: "The Sun's daily output" IS an El Reg standard unit.

It might be, but from what I heard on the news this morning, the Sun's daily output will now be a few jubs less than before.

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Re: Space is big, my brain just ain't

"The Sun's daily output" IS an El Reg standard unit.

Not any more :-)

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Re: Space is big, my brain just ain't

That's a tough one because El Reg doesn't have a standard unit for energy,

It clearly needs one.

1 Joule is 1 Nm, which in Reg units would be 0.0174 Norris linguini (Nolg) (although I have a hard time imagining Chuck with a plate of pasta).

Thinking of some useful Reg-related activity which requires energy, we can see that a pint of beer weighs around 568g (assuming it's mostly water) and a check with the one-off sample of a beer glass I have to hand suggests around 400g for the glass, so lets take a round 1kg for a full pint glass.

Lifting it approx 50cm from table to mouth would require approx 5 joules of energy, so I propose to name that one Quaff. This gives us:

1 Qu = 5J = 0.087 Nolg

Getting back to the original question, the Wikipedia article quotes the Sun as pumping out 384.6 yotta watts (3.846 e+26 W), which is 3.32 e+31 Joules per day, some 6.64 e+30 Quaffs, or 6,640,000 yottaQuaffs.

Now I should get back to work...

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Re: Space is big, my brain just ain't

I thought we'd settled on the jelly baby as a unit of energy?

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Re: Space is big, my brain just ain't

Whether measured in jelly babies, Quaffs, Nolgs or (the more boring) Joules, that's one serious amount of energy being released. Clearly the Vogons are demolishing planets to make way for a hyperspace expressway.

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Facepalm

Re: Space is big, my brain just ain't

Let me try to put this another (perhaps more familiar) way - apparently the Sun's daily output of energy is the e-equals-mc-square equivalent of the mass of about FIVE MILLION QE aircraft carriers every day (albeit that's without any double decker buses on deck). Now who's glad we don't have to foot THAT bill...?

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Boffin

Re: Space is big, my brain just ain't

That's a tough one because El Reg doesn't have a standard unit for energy, but it does have a unit for mass.

So doesn't that mean it can have a standard unit for energy, derived from its unit for mass? All you have to do is use the most famous equation in the world.

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Pint

Re: Space is big, my brain just ain't

"Lifting it approx 50cm from table to mouth would require approx 5 joules of energy, so I propose to name that one Quaff."

That's all well and good, it almost sounds like a proper exercise regime, but what's the ratio of calorific intake of 1 Quaff to the energy expended and can we make it negative while still using a decent beer?

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Re: Space is big, my brain just ain't

can we make it negative while still using a decent beer?

Funny, I had the same thought, and the answer is, sadly, no, at least not without getting a very sore elbow. A pint of beer contains ~ 180 Calories, which is ~750kJ, or 150 kiloQuaffs.

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Windows

Re: Space is big, my brain just ain't

"The Sun's daily output" IS an El Reg standard unit.

2 Bulgarian Airbags, yes?

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Alien

What accounts for fast radio bursts?

If they decode them, I bet they get:

"Come on down to Crazy Xorthax's Used Flying Saucer Emporium!! We keep a huge selection of pre-owned space cruisers and astro shuttles, all of them quality-certified by our on-site maintenance shop! And our prices?! Why, they're so low my competition thinks I was born without a second brain! And if you still need financing?--just ask for Honest Kithek in our credit department!! Why, we're practically givin' em away down here! Our secret?--small galaxy overhead with big galaxy volume!

So, if you need a new UFO now you know the place to go! Crazy Xorthax's, right off exit 3283174 in the Andromeda galaxy! Y'all come down now, ya' hear!!

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Re: What accounts for fast radio bursts?

Depends upon the information density of the signal, and whether it is compressible - which would suggest a repeating component...

"We buy any UFO dot com! We buy any UFO dot com! We buy any UFO dot com! We buy any UFO dot com!"

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Re: What accounts for fast radio bursts?

And then of course when we try to call to buy a space cruiser we're going to find out they've been out of business for 5.4 billion years. It's so annoying when the marketing budget outlives the business.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: What accounts for fast radio bursts?

Wacky Waving Inflatable Tentacle-Flailing Tube-Creature!

Wacky Waving Inflatable Tentacle-Flailing Tube-Creature!

Wacky Waving Inflatable Tentacle-Flailing Tube-Creature!

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[tight beam, M32, tra. @n4.28.885.1008]

xROU Killing Time

oGCV Grey Area

Hey ... wanna see the monkeys freak out?

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Thumb Up

I love that you've got so many upvotes without anyone having to explain the reference.

Only on the Reg :)

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[stuttered tight point, M32, tra. @n4.28.885.1189]

xGCV Grey Area

oROU Killing Time

Shhhh ... keep it down - you wouldn't believe the shitstorm I caused last time I played with the monkeys. All I did was reanimate one of them after they nailed it to a tree...

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AKA Meatfucker

Not only do I get the reference, i know which book it's from and approximately where :)

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Re: AKA Meatfucker

I had to google it.

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Re: AKA Meatfucker

Yugguy - go read it. It's great.

Steven R

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Boffin

Local Sources

Given that the burst seems to peak in the 1200-1300 MHz band, I would suspect that it come from some anomalous propagation. The source could either be military radar or ham radio, as both occupy that band. A particularly robust meteor trail could provide the necessary source.

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Re: Local Sources

How does a local source equate to the energy output? Is the "suns output" estimate adjusted for attenuation?

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Re: Local Sources

Ok, do we get Vulcan visiting rights for detecting a warp drive signature?

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Re: Local Sources

EXPLAIN POLARIZATION!

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Re: Polarization

Find a pair of Polaroid sunglasses, break them and use one lens to filter light from a torch (flashlight) and iluminate an otherwise dark scene with the polarized light. By using the other lens as a polarization analyzer see what reflection and or refraction does to the plane of polarization.

In general, reflected and refracted em waves have the polarization altered. Linear polarized waves can even end up elliptically polarized and vice versa.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Local Sources

If it didn't account for attenuation we wouldn't be having this conversation

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Anonymous Coward

SEND MORE PROBES

THE LAST ONES WERE DELICIOUS

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“We record 8-bit full-polarization data from two orthogonal linear feeds per beam, with 1024 frequency channels over 400 MHz of bandwidth, from 1182 to 1582 MHz, and 64-μs time resolution”

...that sounds so much cooler than _any_ part of my job, Today's mission is to insert this quote - either in part or in its entirety - into today's weekly team meeting.

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Coat

"Hey Brian, I've got a new sound system. We were playing around with it last night and we recorded 8-bit full-polarization data from two orthogonal linear feeds per beam, with 1024 frequency channels over 400 MHz of bandwidth, from 1182 to 1582 MHz, and 64-μs time resolution.

It sounded like that time we put the cat through the mangle when it was wet"

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This post has been deleted by its author

Anonymous Coward

Management

I suppose that's the current equivalent of those days when my technical associate and I used to converse about interociter issues across the table during Senior Management Meetings. They were duly minuted, once we had confirmed the spelling...(Have I got it right?)

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Alien

R2

This is what happens if you go lightspeed while still listening to Radio2. A polarization vortex induces positive feedback into the antenna creating an unstable Mega-Wogan. Under inter-galactic law this is actually a crime.

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Boffins - the most annoying word ever. Why the hell is the Reg so in love with it?

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Boffins - the most annoying word ever. Why the hell is the Reg so in love with it?

If you need to ask that question, I think you're on the wrong website.

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Boffin

More research needed

I don't know why the Reg is so in love with it.

Perhaps we should put some boffins to work and find out.

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Re: More research needed

The Reg recently used 'Boffins' in this article: http://www.theregister.co.uk/2015/01/17/boffins_its_easy_to_make_you_grass_yourself_up_for_crimes_you_never_did/

whereas the Reg of old would have used the term 'Trick cyclists'. What's changed?

The old Reg had the tacit understanding that 'boffins' either made cool stuff- like explosions, laser-equipped sharks and robots - or otherwise used maths so complicated that blackboards would collapse under the weight of chalk and us lesser mortals would get a headache just looking in the general direction of one of their published papers.

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Really?

You have read some of the maths being banded about here, this place is filled with boffins.

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Boffins != trick cyclists

The Reg uses both, and they have a different meaning in Reg-editor-speak.

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Alien

now we just have to slow it down and decode it ...prob just the history of a billion yr old race ..

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Slowed down and decoded..."Vell....Zaphod's just zis guy, you know?"

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Slowed down and reversed it's

"HAIL SATAN AND ALL THE DENIZENS OF HELL WHO WILL COME BEFORE HIM TO CLEAR THE WAY FOR HIS MILLION YEAR REIGN"

Steven R

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Decoded

.- .-.. .-.. -.-- --- ..- .-. -... .- ... . .- .-. . -... . .-.. --- -. --. - --- ..- ...

We have confirmed it was not, repeat NOT 'We are the world'. Minsters are reminded of the advice by Pellegrino & Zebrowski prior to attempting any reply:

1. THEIR SURVIVAL WILL BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN OUR SURVIVAL.

If an alien species has to choose between them and us, they won't choose us. It is difficult to imagine a contrary case; species don't survive by being self-sacrificing.

2. WIMPS DON'T BECOME TOP DOGS.

No species makes it to the top by being passive. The species in charge of any given planet will be highly intelligent, alert, aggressive, and ruthless when necessary.

3. THEY WILL ASSUME THAT THE FIRST TWO LAWS APPLY TO US.

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Re: Decoded

THEY WILL CORRECTLY ASSUME THAT THE FIRST TWO LAWS APPLY TO US.

TIFTFW

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TWB

64us?....

That is the period for 1 line of 625 line SD video.. hmmm...coincidence?...

(no not the active line period, that is 52 or 51.95 if talking analogue)

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Anonymous Coward

Re: 64us?....

64US... 6/4=2, 6/2=3....

Half Life 3 CONFIRMED!

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Probably something big being ripped apart (mass converting to energy) and falling into the blackhole (strong magnetic source).

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I would have thought those type of events would be a bit slower than the time-frame for this observation though.

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