back to article Apple's Watch is basically electric perfume

It isn't just Apple that looks a little less miraculous today – the entire consumer electronics industry is looking a bit tragic and battered. Ever since the iPod became a hit, the media has looked to Apple for divine miracles, for revolutionary market-making products that "restore a sense of childlike wonder", as Fake Steve …

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  1. Halfmad

    Surprisingly disappointing

    I'm no Apple fanboy, I use Windows 8.1 for my sins on my custom gaming PC at home and have a selection of android tablets that the kids use, but I usually find something during Apple presentations which I find cool. Not this time, seen it all before in one flavour or another by another manufacturer and the Apple Watch looked surprisingly similar to others.

    Trying to figure out why anyone would want to carry another smart device around which has 10% of the functionality of their existing smartphone. To top it off though it's not even as "nice" as many of the existing smart-watches, they didn't so much as drop the ball as flatten it, make it shiny and try to strap it to their wrists.

    1. Omniaural

      Re: Surprisingly disappointing

      If Apple had created a watch where the face was the shape of the apple logo, that would have made me sit up.

      LG have managed a round interface, so it just seems to be a lack of imagination on Apple's part that they failed to revolutionise smart watches in the way that previous products have. The Gear S is going to be out before the Apple Watch and I would be more likely to get that, if I were interested at all.

      A watch is a fashion item, therefore how it looks is more important than what it does. The scattergun designs seem to acknowedge that but without managing any real desirability on its own merits.

    2. Mike Bell

      Re: Surprisingly disappointing

      I was surprisingly disappointed by the live stream of he event, which was a complete dog's dinner. Breaking up all the time, and some Chinese bird overdubbing everything for a good part of it. A complete cock-up, basically.

      As to the product line up, the watch was a pretty big thing. I'll never use one myself, but I can see that a lot of effort has gone into it. You're being a little unfair when you say you've "seen it all before". The fact is, you haven't. You haven't seen a bunch of card providers team up with a mobile manufacturer to conduct payments secured by a fingerprint, to give just one example.

      Apple do this kind of thing a couple or three times a year. 'New' products come along rarely. Software changes rather more often. And product upgrades somewhere in between. That's how they manage things year after year.

    3. Jurassic
      Stop

      Re: Surprisingly disappointing (because of a lack of awareness)

      Some articles just compare the looks of Apple's smartwatch to the looks of other smartwatches (with a few nods to some other aspects) but miss the point of the product.

      Is the Apple Watch imperfect and overpriced? Yes!... but so was the first iPhone in 2007, and in 2007 there were many bloggers that just looked at it superficially and didn't get what was really innovative about it.

      Yes, there are other smartwatches out there. But this one is actually useful. It is also the first smartwatch that doesn't look like you have a huge geeky square or circle that completely overpowers your wrist. But even still, the looks should not be the major focus.

      The Apple Watch’s uniqueness and strength, like other Apple products, is its “usability" and "user experience”. Sadly, these terms are meaningless to people who use products that don’t excel in these areas, and so they have no idea of their importance (and also why people love their Apple products so much).

      The Apple watch has a well developed ecosystem in both current and future apps, as well as in services, sensors and other hardware features that are not available on any other smartwatch.

      Like the first iPhone in 2007, it will take some time for certain people to "get it". Also, like the first iPhone, Apple’s competitors will eventually include some of those features and services into their own smartwatches… Eventually.

      But this is just the first version of the Apple Watch. As has happened with all other Apple products, each year will bring even more refinements and features.

      Most other smartwatches have been unsuccessful in sales because consumers just view them as expensive, nerdy gimmicks. But the Apple watch will sell in the millions in the first year, because it is an actually useful, useable mobile device that is worth its cost.

      1. Greg J Preece

        Re: Surprisingly disappointing (because of a lack of awareness)

        First I raised an eyebrow, then I clicked on Jurassic's name and scrolled through a litany of posts, every single one of which was either praising an Apple product to the eyeballs, or attacking another product for not being as good as an Apple one.

        Well, at least you're consistent.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Surprisingly disappointing (because of a lack of awareness)

        "...it will take some time for certain people to "get it""

        Not to be mean, but I personally feel you're not getting it. The iWatch is 15 years too late.

        People in the late 90's and early 2000's wore a watch for a time keeper, today they just use their mobile phone. People in the late 90's and early 2000's used a iPod like device for music, now they just use their mobile phone. The iPod and iWatch are not the same for their time though, being the iPod really was a upgrade to the Walkman (tape or CD based). So, what is the iWatch an upgrade to? The simple answer is that it's an upgrade to the watch you probably don't wear. If this was 1998, the iWatch would be world changing, but that time has passed.

      3. Vector

        Re: Surprisingly disappointing (because of a lack of awareness)

        "Yes, there are other smartwatches out there. But this one is actually useful."

        Please explain to us how this wrist computer is any more "useful" than the ones from Samsung, Moto, et al? Because from what I've read about it, it can be a timepiece, a fitness tracker and it can display notifications. Oh! and apparently, maps though I question just how useful a map that size would be. Most of this is the same hype I've heard from all the other manufacturers who have failed to gain any traction, IMO because there's little traction to gain.

        Many, if not all, of us grew up with the notion of how cool it would be to have a computer wristwatch (in my case, it was envy of Dick Tracy's wristphone, but I'm old) . Now that they can actually be made, you start to realize just how crappy a device that small is as an interactive device.

        Apple will probably sell a fair number of these things. Not because they're useful, but because they're from Apple. The same reason most of the press was raving that Apple had "made" a new product segment with the introduction of this watch that, as with every other wrist device to come out thus far, has too little functionality for far too high a price.

      4. Cody

        Re: Surprisingly disappointing (because of a lack of awareness)

        The problem is, its useless as a watch, but it is basically a watch.

        I am currently wearing a watch that never needs a battery and keeps perfect time. I don't want a WATCH that has to be charged every night. A phone, or a tablet, or a combination of the two, yes.

        The reply is, its not a watch. And then you hear people explain that it does so much more and so many different things, none of which my perpetual and accurate watch can do. This is true. All my watch can do is tell the time, perfectly and trouble free for decades on end. And rather cheap by the way - about one tenth of what the iWatch costs - and quite good looking.

        As the argument continues you see that the iWatch really isn't a watch at all, its a form of wearable miniature tablet. At this point you have to start comparing it with the nexus 7 and ask why do I want to pay three times as much for something that is far less functional? Just so I can wear it on my wrist? Or three times as much as the nexus 5 if I really find the tablet too large...

        People will buy this, because many in the West will at the moment buy anything Apple puts out. But the problem will come in a month or two when they find they are simply not using it, don't want to put it on, and it will start appearing on Ebay, and not too long after that in charity shops.

        And in the next financial report we will see an item: inventory write downs.

      5. Michael Strorm Silver badge

        Re: Surprisingly disappointing (because of a lack of awareness)

        @Jurassic. This quote from the article

        "It is also the first smartwatch that doesn't look like you have a huge geeky square or circle that completely overpowers your wrist."

        On the contrary, there's something just a bit naff about it. For one thing, there's something datedly "noughties" about the version watch seen on the right here:-

        http://cdn0.mos.techradar.futurecdn.net//art/Watches/Apple%20Watch/release%20date/apple-watch-compatibility-900-90.jpg

        If anything, some aspects look indefinably *early*-to-mid-noughties, shiny white space-age-revivalism meets early iPod.

        The shiny-shiny-tech-fetishism aesthetic in general is itself is (to me) starting to seem dated and out of place, as if it's the one surviving hangover of the late-noughties "3D glossy graphics" era that's been superseded by a return to flat, squared design and general colour trends towards less saturated colours (i.e. take a bright colour and mix a little white and/or black in with it).

        But the other aspect of it that I felt was a bit tacky was summed up nicely in this quote from the article:- "Apple's new aesthetic struck me as very "Bangkok Tech Mall" (*). It's as if Samsung or an ambitious Chinese manufacturer had been permitted to license iOS and the consulting services of Jonny Ive for a week."

        Bingo. It's like a Chinese company upped its game and made a sort-of-professional looking phone watch that nonetheless didn't make the true aesthetic leap that took it beyond looking like an (older!) iPhone squeezed into a watch form, something whose designers still mentally saw as a "gadget". Thus, it's still sort of clunky and cheesy, it still has a "geek gadget" vibe.

        But maybe it's just- to me- that gadget fetishism is starting to lose its lustre, or rather, lost it long ago (as did the trend of thinking smartphones are the answer to all the world's problems- something else the article got spot on- geeks and boys' toys technology-fetishists rationalising their obsession as something more grown-up and worthy).

        The fact is that Apple, while they never invented the stuff they are often over-credited for, *do* at least deserve credit for transforming (e.g.) the MP3 player and smartphone into a usable and consumer-friendly form. This, on the other hand, looks exactly what someone designing a "smartwatch" in the iPhone era would come up with (e.g. a Chinese OEM). It's an iPhone design and aesthetic obviously squeezed to fit a watch format, and already looks obvious and dated- even if it hasn't actually been done before in this way.

        No doubt, being Apple, it will still be better-designed, less buggy and more pleasurable to use than would something similar from another company that (like many) copies Apple's superficial aesthetics, but doesn't go all the way in terms of usability. Still, there's something about it that smacks of Apple having lost its way after Jobs' death, of being forced to do this because if they don't someone else will, even if there's no obvious reason.

        It's arguable that the iPhone may have fallen into that category- someone *might* have come up with a similar concept (albeit later rather than sooner) and so they launched the iPhone despite it eating their own iPod's lunch, because better to eat your own lunch than have someone else, especially if it takes you even further. (Most companies in that position would short-sightedly have squashed or suppressed the iPhone to protect their current cash cow, so all credit to Appl there). But- whatever one thinks of the original iPhone- it never came across as a desperate measure, nor pointless.

        Which I'm not sure can be said of the iWatch.

        (*) Not sure why Bangkok, surely Shanghai is where the latest Chinese gizmos are more likely to be found? Not a big deal though, I see where you're coming from.

        1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

          Re: Surprisingly disappointing (because of a lack of awareness)

          But maybe it's just- to me- that gadget fetishism is starting to lose its lustre, or rather, lost it long ago (as did the trend of thinking smartphones are the answer to all the world's problems- something else the article got spot on- geeks and boys' toys technology-fetishists rationalising their obsession as something more grown-up and worthy).

          Yes. This hagiography of the smartphone has been prominent for several years in one of my academic fields, digital rhetoric, and has indeed gotten so obnoxious that I started avoiding conference panels where it looked like anyone was going to be talking about the damn things. Disillusionment can't come too soon.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Surprisingly disappointing (because of a lack of awareness)

          Dateline: Bangkok.

          Most visible brand by far, is Apple, and the volume of unlocked PAYG iPhones, iPads etc. both new and pre-owned is astonishing.

          Never been in Shanghai, unfortunately.

      6. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

        Re: Surprisingly disappointing (because of a lack of awareness)

        The Apple Watch’s uniqueness and strength, like other Apple products, is its “usability" and "user experience”. Sadly, these terms are meaningless to people who use products that don’t excel in these areas, and so they have no idea of their importance (and also why people love their Apple products so much).

        You can't understand what's so great about my cult until you join my cult!

        Go sit in the corner with the homeopaths and Scientologists, would you?

      7. JEDIDIAH
        Devil

        Re: Surprisingly disappointing (because of a lack of awareness)

        > The Apple Watch’s uniqueness and strength, like other Apple products, is its “usability" and "user experience”. Sadly, these terms are meaningless to people who use products that don’t excel in these areas

        No. They're just meaningless marketspeak. While those terms might have some meaning if you back them up with something, the way that you are employing them makes them meaningless. You just take it as an article of faith that whatever Apple is doing is "better".

    4. Steve Channell
      FAIL

      Re: Surprisingly disappointing.. Jobs would have pulled it!

      The only compelling thing about a watch is that it can use skin contact to do things that a phone can't, and that means health and security.. notifications, apps and colours are a nice if you can budget the battery.

      You don't get Health monitoring if you can't monitor through the night (Apple's doesn't).

      A Watch NFC payment only becomes secure when you can identify someone by their health monitoring (Apple's can't).

      Apple's Watch doesn't have the battery-life to be useful, and its too late to remove the colour screen to save battery: Steve Jobs would have pulled it.

      Wearing a bling-only watch that does payments and advertises an iPhone in your pocket is the most stupid tech idea this century

    5. Mark 65

      Re: Surprisingly disappointing

      Here in Oz the iPhone 6 giant bastard edition is $999 for a 16GB device. Nearly a thousand dollars FFS! What shit are these idiots smoking? I like Apple kit but $999 for the plus and $869 for the normal 6 bottom of the range editions is nuts. It's not like you can stick a microSD card in it and get practically infinite storage. The 128GB 6+ is more expensive than a 13" Macbook Air. A poxy phone costing more than a laptop. If it weren't for the fact I'm not a fan of the Android interface I'd jump on board. Under the current pricing I hope my present phone lasts as long as I do.

  2. Winkypop Silver badge
    Devil

    A watch!

    Imagine that, a watch!

    Set the alarm for when we get flying cars.

    1. Fungus Bob

      Re: A watch!

      Flying cars is old news:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzkugMVUUc4

      Got airborne a few times myself back in my salad days...

  3. ElReg!comments!Pierre

    Well there's SOMETHING a gadget could solve for me

    and this thing is secure authentication. Really secure, not the watered-down-to-please-the-morons things that we currently have on gadgets.

    These days I use a combination of PGP (barebones, not in cuddly-feely -and broken- plugins), a unique code generator card reader for my banking, and my FSF smartcard. None of these is really convenient in terms of mobility. I have my PGP keys on a USB dongle but I need a PGP-enabled computer to use them. The FSF smartcard needs a card reader (d'uh). The code-generating cardreader my bank gave me comes close but I seem to keep forgetting it when I most need it. Ideally a phone or watch or shoe or whatev's, on which I could "bonk" a physical token, then enter a passphrase, and that would spit out an unique code for me to type would be good.

    Of course we can't have that because it's all too difficult to use for the morons, so we'll stay stuck with permanently-tied 1-factor wirelessly broadcast shit, wide open to all sorts of mischief.

    Oh well.

  4. DominoT
    Stop

    Yes. Your point was?

    Well, yes. Apple's copy and refine technique is nothing new.

    The Watch is just a new smart watch using better features than the others.

    But so was the iPad. And the iPhone. Wasn't the iPod just a better Diamond Rio? Wasn't the Mac just a cheaper Lisa? Which itself was just a clone of the Xerox Parc source Alto?

    When you have a point, feel free to make it.

    1. Dan 55 Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: Yes. Your point was?

      In fact if anything Apple have been rather quick to jump on the watch bandwagon compared to their other devices. Jobs would probably have had the balls to wait at least another year and convince everyone he was right to wait.

    2. Khaptain Silver badge

      Re: Yes. Your point was?

      Agreed, but Apple have the facetious tendency to market things as though they did actually invent the [item] from scratch.

    3. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      Re: Yes. Your point was?

      DominoT,

      There is a difference. The iPhone (even the original that didn't do very much) and the iPad were both nice. The Watch isn't. It's ugly. It's not a very good watch, and it doesn't seem to be pointing the way to a very good wrist computer either. They may as well have not bothered.

      I don't think Steve Jobs would have made it, because I don't think the technology is available to make one that's worth it yet. Not that will sell in its millions at high profit anyway, and that's Apple's market.

      Coming into a market that's maturing, but still imperfect due to technological limitations is what Apple did with the iPhone, iPod and iPad. They also integrated the things you did with your new iShiny into a suite of apps and services. Love 'em or hate 'em, Apple were bloody good at this. It's what makes me think they can get NFC payment to go mainstream, when no-one else has managed it.

  5. Valerion

    Freudian

    >>You can transmit a pre-programmed Watch code that your partner will know means "Fancy a quickie?" But winking remains cheaper.<<

    Totally misread that last sentence the first time.

  6. Forget It

    Let's not compare Apples and Orange

    The latter's Watch is already a Clockword Orange

    Boom boom.

  7. NoneSuch Silver badge

    Nailed it

    Good article and analysis. Apple is more fashion than function. The Jordache jeans of the tech world where you pay a premium for a name and little else.

    1. Ted Treen

      Re: Nailed it

      It would appear that you consider "good analysis" to be that which agrees with or reinforces your own particular prejudices. Still, I suppose at least 70% of people take that route.

      Me? I think the items might be interesting - we'll see in due course when they're released and can be examined. I still know of many who buy Apple computers not for a fancy logo, but for OSX and a straightforward computing experience. Not everyone wants to wrestle with Windows, or become a Linux geek - in much the same way that many car drivers have no desire to learn how to be a mechanic.

      I say "Good for you" to those who do wish to be Windows-wrestlers, or Linux-geeks, but that doesn't make you a superior being, anymore than slating Apple just because it's fashionable to do so amongst certain geek sectors makes you smart.

      Almost any article on El Reg which concern Apple is little more than troll-bait and is followed by the inevitable troll-fest.

      I read very few of 'em, these days.

      1. handle

        I think your iWatch is running slow...

        "...or become a Linux geek - in much the same way that many car drivers have no desire to learn how to be a mechanic."

        I think it's running slow by about a decade.

        "I read very few of 'em, these days."

        But you read this one...

      2. Greg J Preece

        Re: Nailed it

        It would appear that you consider "good analysis" to be that which agrees with or reinforces your own particular prejudices.

        Followed by...

        Almost any article on El Reg which concern Apple is little more than troll-bait and is followed by the inevitable troll-fest.

        I think you might be the person with the issue you describe...

      3. ElReg!comments!Pierre

        Re: Nailed it

        "Not everyone wants to wrestle with Windows, or become a Linux geek - in much the same way that many car drivers have no desire to learn how to be a mechanic."

        In much the same way as you're not required to know what kind of gas goes in your tank, how to change a wheel, a bulb or similarly basic maintenance on your car to drive it. Oh wait, you ARE required by law to know how to do that on your car. Good thing Apple doesn't make cars. Your analogy sux salty balls by the dozen.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Nailed it

          "Oh wait, you ARE required by law to know how to do that on your car."

          As good an idea as that might be, in the UK you are not even required to carry a spare. If you do it must meet standards. Nor is changing a tyre part of the test.

        2. Pascal Monett Silver badge

          Re: you're not required to know what kind of gas goes in your tank

          Um, if you don't want to ruin your diesel engine by pouring in regular gas, or vice-versa, then you pretty damn well need to know what gas to put in your car.

          You need to climb down and take a breather, the air you breath seems pretty thin there.

          1. Persona non grata

            Re: you're not required to know what kind of gas goes in your tank

            "Um, if you don't want to ruin your diesel engine by pouring in regular gas, or vice-versa, then you pretty damn well need to know what gas to put in your car."

            This is obviously an attempt to fool us - you don't put gas in a car, you put a liquid called petrol (or diesel, or the confusingly named CNG or LNG which despite having gas in the name are actually liquids*) in it! (Or electricity if you're a lucky-bastard Tesla owner)

            Bloody merkins ruining the place...

            * added in a vain attempt to satisfy the pedants including myself.

          2. ElReg!comments!Pierre

            I'm sorry you ARE required to know your way around basic maintenance

            CU20 Using a vehicle with defective parts or accessories

            CU30 Using a vehicle with defective tyres

            So I should have been more precise: you're not under any bligation to know how to change a bulb: you always have the option of parking your vehicle right away and finishing your journey on foot.

            You may also want to have a look at these:

            https://www.gov.uk/vehicle-maintenance-safety-security

            https://www.gov.uk/rules-drivers-motorcyclists-89-to-102/vehicle-condition-89

            1. LazyLazyman

              Re: I'm sorry you ARE required to know your way around basic maintenance

              The thing is though, getting a Linux machine to play nicely with a wide range of peripherals and software is not the same as putting petrol in your car. Putting the right kind of fuel in your car is more like knowing how to plug in a mouse.

              And no, you are not required to know how to change a wheel or a bulb. Cars in the UK do not have to carry a spare wheel and bulbs on most modern cars are a pain in the rear to change. My headlights require the removal of the wheel and wheel lining, not something you can realistically do without a car lift. Most modern cars do not carry a spare wheel, only a can of tyre weld, which should never be used anyway as it ruins fixable tyres and just goes all over your leg when the hole is to big to fix. You do need to know when there a bulb is blown or a tyre is illegal, but anyone can do that.

              The fact that people don't know these things leads me to think they know nothing about basic car maintenance. Most people don't want to mess about getting a printer to work or knowing what to do when your computer suddenly decides to stop seeing your router. They just want to switch it on and do what they need to do. Apple understand this. Microsoft kind of try to, but also have business needs in mind. Linux still seem to be in the phase where cars were with groups of geeks standing around snorting "Of course people know how to clean and fix a carb. Otherwise they shouldn't have a car!".

      4. Jagged

        Re: Nailed it

        "I still know of many who buy Apple computers not for a fancy logo, but for OSX and a straightforward computing experience. Not everyone wants to wrestle with Windows"

        - My Misses insists on owning a Mac because she says "its user experience is so much better" yet she spends her evenings that she uses the device, swearing and turning the air blue! If my household is anything to go by, "OSX as a better computing experience" is just another Apple marketing myth!

        1. JEDIDIAH
          Alert

          Re: Nailed it

          If you aren't already a member of the cult, you may find MacOS quirky. It may seem to you that it's going out of it's way to be different just enough to be annoying to anyone used to something else.

    2. Hipsterina

      Re: Nailed it

      "Apple is more fashion than function. The Jordache jeans of the tech world where you pay a premium for a name and little else."

      Except...

      You can enjoy Jordache jeans without paying a penny using only your eyes: they're often close to a very attractive arse.

      With Apple:

      (i) you pay through the nose;

      (ii) the proximal arse is rarely attractive, though often smirk-worthy.

  8. JDX Gold badge

    Apple Watch ... a solution looking for a problem

    Couldn't the same be said for the iPad? Many of us thought so.

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      Re: Apple Watch ... a solution looking for a problem

      Couldn't the same be said for the iPad? Many of us thought so.

      No. The iPad did fulfill a need. One people didn't quite know they had. A desktop PC is stuck in one place. A laptop is awkward to use. A tablet is just right, so long as you don't have to type too much. And of course everyone was now using the internet to read online news, or watch online catchup TV. Smart TVs were horrible to use as well. Still are...

      I knew the iPad would sell, although I didn't expect it to go quite so mainstream. I had an HP laptop with swivelly screen. So a heavy tablet, and burdened by Vista. Which was a bit slow and lumbering, but perfectly usable with a stylus. Fingers could navigate you to use the basic stuff, but there weren't any 12" capacitative screens around, so it was resistive too.

      Nonetheless I loved that tablet. I could sit in a comfy chair and read El Reg. I could write emails with the stylus in that same comfy chair. Faster than any onscreen keyboard or voice activated doohickey I've used up to now.

      Other people were fascinated with it too. Whenever people saw me with it, they'd want a go, and be very impressed. But it wasn't nice looking, or all that easy to use, and it was pretty heavy. You had to be pretty strong to use it one handed, without propping it up on something. The iPad was cheaper, and but for having proper file storage and a stylus, better in every other way.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Apple Watch ... a solution looking for a problem

        I've never been a fan of the smart watch concept. I could see getting one for fitness tracking when I'm biking, running or lifting, but the idea hasn't excited me enough to actually do so. The Apple Watch presentation didn't change that.

        What I think might is seeing what ideas developers come up with when they can start applying their ideas. Cook also hinted in an interview that there are secrets yet to be revealed about it...I can imagine Apple might hold a few things back to save some surprise for the actual launch.

        1. LazyLazyman

          Re: Apple Watch ... a solution looking for a problem

          For that the pebble is much better, and hopefully will have a price drop now. Once it goes sub £100 I can't see myself being able to justify a cycle computer any longer over a pebble.

    2. Oninoshiko

      Re: Apple Watch ... a solution looking for a problem

      Some of us still think so.

      Only thing mine ever does is watch online videos. It's only worth the price because it was free.

    3. JEDIDIAH
      Linux

      Re: Apple Watch ... a solution looking for a problem

      > Couldn't the same be said for the iPad? Many of us thought so.

      What? That it would turn out to be just a media consumption terminal? Like the Archos 5 or Archos 9 but with a better advertising and marketing budget?

      Although I am still waiting for a tablet that can displace my Archos 5.

  9. Bel Fegore

    The comments industry looks a bit tragic and battered. Ever since knocking Apple became a staple of tech writers, they looked for new products from Apple to restore the sense of superiority that only a good rant could give.

    Unfortunately re-writing the same comment that has been popular ever since the Graphical User Interface, reached near hysteria with the iMac and climbed a rousing crescendo with the iPhone has now finally led to be the refuge of the sad and the desperately unimaginative.

    Since yesterday even the most rampant of commenters must feel a tad sheepish and will find it hard to repeat the same stereotypes again. And again, and again.

    Do you remember when commenters dismissed Apple's late entry into the MP3 market? Who would want to use a 'mouse'? Wasn't the iPad just a huge arsed iPhone? Give the money back to the shareholders!

    Now all the mocking commenters are imitating each other, the sarcastic tweets all retweeting the same three jokes, even the tech reporting elite second guessing their readers prejudices in ever more desperate attempts to creating the required click-bait that keeps the industry alive.

    Meanwhile internet security, congestion, competition – the important matters – none of those things will be fixed with another comment that was already old when the Mac came out.

    1. Financegozu
      Thumb Up

      Check that mandatory reading for bloggers IMHO

      http://thepessimist.com/2013/08/07/how-to-be-outraged-on-the-internet/

      Good stuff!

    2. Paw Bokenfohr
    3. It'sa Mea... Mario

      Bang. On. :)

      Upvoted

    4. thatguycraig

      Fanboi alert.

      I think the problem has always lied, for myself anyway, in the sheer hysteria and "look... i have an iPhone.... and yours is what... a Samsung? and LG? har har...." at least thats always been my experience here in the UK.

      Don't get me wrong, I LOVED the Ipod. Still do. Every morning on my way to work, every evening on my way home and the Journeys in between, my iPod is plugged into my USB port on my Car Stereo, pumping out some quality Country tracks (yes, a 27 year old country fan from the UK, as rare as rocking horse s**t) but before that in my late teens, my previous Ipods were used walking to college playing Greenday and Blink 182. I actually owned one of the first consumer market Mp3 players, which was ok, but swiftly moved to, and stuck to, the iPod.

      That's the first and last apple product I've owned tho. I myself HATE over-hyped "stuff" be it a movie or a piece of tech. Enter EVERYTHING Apple based.

      I think the Apple Watch actually looks pretty neat, and even though I have NEVER seen the point in ANY smart watch ( I just don't get why anyone would need one, sports enthusiast or not ) it has some OK looking functions and features. Would I have one? Well, no. If someone walked up to me in the street and gave me one for free, (apart from the fact I never have and never will own an iPhone) it would probably be a nice 'thing' for a couple days before promptly getting re-boxed and put into a drawer somewhere.

      Apple in my opinion, are the exact things you are trying to defend. A monster of a global marketing Juggernaut that are really only telling fad crazy, fashion conscious Air heads that their device, with its sheer lack of functionality, and its need for a complete re-design of everything the modern man/woman knows, is a 'must' a 'need' and really something they need

      What was my point again? I've lost track.

      Its basically like trying to sell me a Commador 64 as a "new games console"

  10. Drat

    One thing that android wear has that Apple watch doesn't is Google Now notifications. A lot of my phone checking involves flicking through these notifications; travel time to work/home, share prices, latest cricket scores etc. Being able to glance at a watch to flick through these gives me a nice level of convinience. Add to this notifications of emails/messages, walking navgation and music control (which I am sure Apple Watch does too) and I think it just about tips the smart watch from gimic to useful for me.

    1. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge

      Google Notifications?

      Perhaps for some having as little to do with google as possible is regarded as a Bonus?

      my phone is able to make calls and send Text's. That's it so what do I know about anything?

      {Don't answer that!}

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