back to article Euro judges: Copyright has NOT changed, you WON'T get sued for browsing the web

The highest European Court today confirmed that the internet can carry on working just like it has for 20 years. In doing so, it was batting away a strange request for "clarification" on copyright from the UK's Supreme Court. For the internet to function, it was established very early on that certain devices - such as routers …

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  1. Frankee Llonnygog

    Lord Sumption

    First name Ass, by any chance?

    1. DJO Silver badge

      Re: Lord Sumption

      And his wife would be Con short for Connie, "Lady Con Sumption" has interesting connotations (Lord Notation is another one)

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Lord Sumption

      If it is true, then the Ass is a Lawyer.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Lord Sumption

      Would make a change from the Law being an Ass.

  2. John Sanders
    Paris Hilton

    There are two things I will not get to see

    A Neptune orbiter

    Any of the morons in power getting a clue about how technology (any) works.

  3. Whitter
    Mushroom

    Copyright madness

    No remembering anything now mind you!

  4. Pete 2 Silver badge

    Is this what the EU is for?

    to provide technical support to the bewigged-ones and prevent they from hitting the STOP button on the internet whenever they get a panic attack from all this newfangled tech-knowledgery that has suddenly appeared all around them.

    If so, maybe it IS earning the billions we chuck at it every year </ohcraphowdiditgetthisbad>

    1. DropBear
      Trollface

      Re: Is this what the EU is for?

      I have an idea: let's hand over the internet to them completely! You know, the nice black box with the light, only we equip it with a nice red e-stop button labelled "STOP" too. Really, they can have it!

    2. big_D Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: Is this what the EU is for?

      You see, the EU is good for something other than making going on holiday easier. :-P

  5. Will Godfrey Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Sorry for repeating myself

    Just when I thought they couldn't get more stupid...

    1. Fibbles

      Re: Sorry for repeating myself

      Solution: Always assume they can be more stupid.

  6. bigtimehustler

    How did this idiot end up in that position...what if he had to make this decision for himself, I am actually for leaving the EU but that would leave this man and his colleagues with the responsibility to decide on these things, which he doesn't seem to be able to do. He should be relieved of his position for showing his ineptitude.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      There are worse individuals

      Tony Blair for instance.

      and I'm for leaving the EU gravy train too, but that is besides the point.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "How did this idiot end up in that position.."

      I don't know the man, but based on the couple of run of the mill country court judges I have known, I'd wager that he's a damn sight clever than most of the people commenting. Not withstanding the idiot MP's passing dreadful legislation drafted by well meaning but collectively incompetent civil servants, British judges are amongst the most highly regarded in the world, which is why so many international contracts are written under the laws of England & Wales, and disputes arbitrated in English courts.

      Typically the actual coverage of a judgement is so abbreviated of the often lengthy technical and legal basis of a judge's opinion that it is easy to assume these people are clowns. I would guess that Lord Sumption is well aware of the surrounding law, but was (for specific reasons) seeking clarification, because that's how law works.

  7. kryptonaut
    Alert

    OMG Mirrors!

    What if I accidentally put a mirror next to a newspaper, should I be fined for making a copy? What if nobody looks at it, is the copy still there?

    And if there happened to be two mirrors facing each other, should I be fined an infinite number of times?

    These questions must be answered, lest civilisation as we know it collapse into utter anarchy!

    1. frank ly

      Re: OMG Mirrors!

      If a newspaper is copied in the forest and there's nobody there to read it, does ....er ......

      1. Pete 2 Silver badge

        Re: OMG Mirrors!

        > If a newspaper is copied in the forest and there's nobody there to read it, does ....er ......

        does a bear use it for toilet paper?

      2. heyrick Silver badge

        Re: OMG Mirrors!

        @ frank ly: don't worry, the bear will use it to wipe with...

    2. Uffish

      Re: OMG Mirrors!

      Talking of newspapers and printing, did our forebears have to go through this farce when printing was developed (all that type you've set up there is a mirror image of my book, pay me!). I suspect not.

      Tar the noble Lord, feather the noble Lord and run the noble Lord out of town.

      1. Frumious Bandersnatch

        Re: OMG Mirrors!

        all that type you've set up there is a mirror image of my book, pay me!

        Fine, have this anti-money, freshly spun from my supercollider. Just don't mix it up with your regular money.

      2. teebie

        Re: OMG Mirrors!

        "did our forebears have to go through this farce when printing was developed"

        There was a hgue 'home printing is killing calligraphy' campaign

      3. Steve 114

        Re: OMG Mirrors!

        Until 1855, every newspaper sold had to have a government stamp attached. Copies didn't go unnoticed. (Within my lifetime, there was a stamp on every new pack of playing cards).

        And FWIW, Sumption probably noticed an ambiguity that needed resolving.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    defining his role

    He just wants to be remembered for something... even if it is taking that thing that works pretty well and messing it up so it doesn't work anymore.... at least he'll be remembered.

    So when our EU overlords hire some techno-caveman like this, when exactly can i ask for my 14 billion back?

    1. Kristian Walsh Silver badge

      Re: defining his role

      The techno-caveman was appointed by and is employed by Her Majesty's Government. He referred the issue out of the UK court system, and up to the "EU overlords" at the European Court.

      They would appear to know a little bit about law and technology, because it was they who told him to not be such a bloody idiot.

      And if you really paid £14bn to the EU, you need a better tax consultant.

  9. DavCrav

    "However, none of this seems to have occurred to the man described as "the cleverest man in Britain"..."

    Who, him? Is he cleverer than Stephen Hawking? Sir Michael Atiyah? etc. etc.

    1. Grikath

      Not really... You must be very, very clever to be this stupid deliberately.

  10. Mark 85

    Reassurance

    It's very reassuring for myself in the US to see that you have the same type of idiots running things. And no, we won't exchange Wheeler or certain Senators for "cleverest man in Britain".

    1. FrankAlphaXII

      Re: Reassurance

      Id say it was a bargain if we got rid of McConnell, Reid, Boxer, Rand Paul (have to distinguish from his father, though they're both insane), Durbin, Cruz, Franken and Rubio for this guy. As you can probably tell, I don't care for either of the two major parties.

  11. Tom 35

    an essential part of the technological process

    Well you could turn off the browser cache and it would still work, just slow...

    So PAY ME!.

    Don't try and tell me some troll will not try that at some point.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: an essential part of the technological process

      The same effect can be achieved by the server end stating effectively "this content must not be cached" in the header (ie "Cache-control: private")

      The point in question though is more like the stage of re-assembling the bitstream in ram in order to be able to render the page.

  12. Nathanial Wapcaplet

    has anyone seen Terry Fuckwit recently?

    I wonder how much these people earn whist inventing these probems?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Lord Sumption

      Is a multimillionaire and a writer in his spare time.

      He got to be a multimillionaire by coming up with arguments for which large companies were prepared to pay large amounts of money.

  13. davtom

    I wonder if it's legal to write "Hello, McFly!" or if it's a breach of copyright of the Back to the Future script.

    1. Frumious Bandersnatch

      I wonder if it's legal to write "Hello, McFly!" or if it's a breach of copyright of the Back to the Future script.

      Only one way to know: go back to 1985 and find out. (or get there beforehand and sue the erstwhile writers for stealing your script)

  14. Phil W

    Serious implication

    So temporary copies that are 'essential' to the process of delivering the content to the user are fine. But what about temporary copies held as part of the delivery process such as ISPs monitoring your web traffic for security/advertising reasons?

    Obviously there are all kinds of other reasons to be concerned about that happening but could an ISP be sued for copyright infringement over that?

    Same goes for the NSA and GCHQ et al. While they may have disturbing legal protections allowing them to snoop our email and storage etc. Could they be sued for copyright infringement over the content they've snooped (assuming of course you some how knew they had snooped it).

    It would be hard to argue (though I'm sure both ISPs and security agencies respectively would try) that any of the temporary copies are 'essential' to the process of content delivery.

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  16. Shaha Alam

    wait, is the temporary data part of the plumbing of the internet (in which case i'm not responsible for it) or is it part of the content (which i am responsible for).

    cos i think we can all trot off a few examples of "content" if found in the browser cache of your computer that could get you in serious trouble.

    can someone please explain this apparent inconsistency?

  17. Mostly Human

    Digital watch?

    Reminds me of that classic Not The Nine O'clock News sketch with the crusty old judge, "A digital watch...? What on earth is a digital watch?"

  18. king of foo

    stupid questions; no such thing

    I for one am glad he asked the question. This schoolyard culture of pointing the finger at someone when they ask a question that others deem obvious needs to stop. I've seen it happen far too often in I.T. and it results in even more feckless decision-making born out of fear of looking stupid.

    "The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing."

    Socrates

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