back to article Linux app lets you control fruit fly brains - with frikkin' LASERS

I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords … a collaboration between researchers in Vienna and the US has produced high-resolution laser-control over fruit flies. If you have access to the necessary kit (cameras and a galvanometer) to track the fruit fly (Drosophila melanogaster in their experiment), plus a 635nm and a 808nm …

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  1. Andrew Jones 2

    So -

    if heating the neuron causes the fly to become randy - does that mean we can conclude that mobile phone use makes humans horny?

    1. Don Jefe

      That depends on the number you're calling.

  2. Don Jefe

    Head Targeted Heating

    One of my favorite parts about science is the correlation between the magnitude of fucked upness (Fm) in an experiment and the stringing together of words in such a way that if presented out of context the subject being exposed would credit a Nazi serial killer with using those terms.

    The term head targeted heating is a good example. If a hobo came up to you and said 'head targeted heating' it would be creepy as fuck. If someone went around and wrote 'head targeted heating' on municipal property, bathroom stall doors and fresh fruit I guarantee the Catcher In The Rye functionality embedded in every 1117th person from Connecticut would be activated in at least a few of them.

    Science is fun!

    1. Eddy Ito

      Re: Head Targeted Heating

      That's the kind of thing that makes me think about upgrading my hat to several layers of heavy duty commercial grade tinfoil. Shiny side out of course.

    2. Evil Auditor Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re science is fun!

      This HTH is likely the coolest thing I'll see all week. Even much better than the laser targeted cat craze I play with the neighbour's feline.

      1. Steven Roper

        Re: Re science is fun!

        "laser targeted cat craze"

        Don't overdo that, the little bastards do learn. I did it once too often with my two cats, to the point where they now know exactly what a laser dot is and that it's simply not worth the bother of chasing it. They don't even follow it or look at it any more when I wave it around, instead they simply look at the laser pointer in my hand and then at me, with an expression that clearly says, "What the fuck do you take me for?"

  3. Martin Budden Silver badge
    Coat

    the researchers fired neurons that resulted in a “mating attempt with a ball of wax while simultaneously vibrating their wings in such a way to create their mating song.”

    Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a wax banana?

  4. Mark 85
    Terminator

    Well, they got it to imitate Michael Jackson and then to try to have sex with an inanimate object.... I think the researchers would fit right into the IT world. Possibly the fly, also, but it would have to like beer and bacon sarnies.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Fly swatter needed

    I liked the part where they managed to immobilize the fly with a laser. Would work nicely to eliminate the fly buzzing around my room...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Thumb Up

      IMNSHO

      This is just the prelude to the Star Wars Mosquito Defense System

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSIWpFPkYrk

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Fly swatter needed

      Exactly. At some point in the experiment somebody must have given in to temptation and turned the laser power up to 11.

      I know I would have.

  6. Evil Auditor Silver badge
    Flame

    Surely, we'd welcome our new insect laser slaves.

    Could we use the same tech with a pumped up laser to evaporate mosquitoes?

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Awesome!

    I just imagine myself heading to the parliament with this marvell with me...

  8. tony2heads
    Linux

    Finally

    a linux app that we really need!

    This should be a huge breakthrough

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Finally

      "a linux app that we really need!"

      They tried Windows but all they got was blue-arsed fly of death

  9. Crisp

    How soon before this technology can be adapted for wasps or bees?

    Yes, I want a laser controlled bee cannon.

    (If the bees could wear little laser packs as well that would be great.)

  10. Steven Roper

    How long before this gets used on people?

    The cops would certainly love it; just point a laser at you and you walk calmly right into a prison cell.

  11. Tony Green

    Frikkin???

    What the fuck does "frikkin" mean?

    1. Clive Galway

      Re: Frikkin???

      Go watch Austin Powers.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What could be more useful for mere mortals is a slightly larger laser that fries them annoyances. Hmm... Maybe I should start working on such setup...

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