back to article Clarkson: 'I WILL find and KILL the spammers who hacked me'

Motormouth Top Gear star Jeremy Clarkson has joked he will kill the spammers who took his Twitter account on a joyride to tout dodgy diet pills. Several tweets appeared on his feed promoting miracle weight-loss medicine. But the stunt may backfire on the Twitter-jackers: rather than delete the spam and reset his password, …

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  1. LarsG

    Technology is not one of his strong points, softly down to his age.

    1. Andrew Newstead

      Oy! Less about the age!

      1. Andrew Newstead

        There are quite a few of us "more mature" readers out here and we don't take kindly to being tarred by this brush (well I don't anyway).

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          so I WILL find you

          and KILL you, etc.

        2. Jamie Jones Silver badge
          Coat

          "There are quite a few of us "more mature" readers out here and we don't take kindly to being tarred by this brush (well I don't anyway)."

          Awww, you replied twice - did you forget your first reply? :-)

          *runs away cowardly-like*

          1. zaax
            Coat

            I think he had what is called a 'senior moment'

            I'm out of the back door, down the street getting the bus home.

    2. ChrisBoy
      Unhappy

      I don't mind being compared by age...

      ... if that's all that's being compared.

      I know how the internal combustion engine works, am quite at home with all kinds of technology and work with a fine and varied selection of programming languages, old and new.

      That I have anything more than greying hair in common with the dundus who does more than most to make the celebration of wilful ignorance 'fun' would be a slur, to put it mildly.

      1. Peter Gathercole Silver badge

        Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

        I have an working knowledge of an internal combustion engine as well, but I don't have greying hair in common. This is despite my being only about two months younger than Jeremy, and is neither because I am bald nor is it because I use dye.

        I sympathise with my follicaly or pigmentaly challenged compatriots.

      2. djack

        Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

        I don't think you're being fair there. He has his viewpoints and they may be polarised to yours, that doesn't necessarily make them invalid or willingly ignorant any more than yours are.

        Quite often his belligerence, when not exaggerating for entertainment purposes, is due to him actually believing what he is saying is right. Importantly, he is willing to change his opinions if they are shown to be wrong. The whole bank account details thing is a case in point. He believed that 'the experts' were over exaggerating the problem and needlessly scaring people and throwing seemingly pointless obstacles in the way of daily life. Believing himself to be right, he didn't just grandstand but put his money where his mouth was.

        He was shown to be dead wrong. Did he dissemble? Did he go on the defensive or on the offensive? Nope. Unlike many, he quickly acknowledged the reality of the situation and changed his opinion.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Flame

          Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

          "I don't think you're being fair there. He has his viewpoints and they may be polarised to yours, that doesn't necessarily make them invalid or willingly ignorant any more than yours are."

          Anyone with right wing views is labelled ignorant or reactionary or some other right-on putdown for anyone the "liberal" (read: totalitarian stalinist) lefties disagree with since they can't handle their naive world view being challenged and don't handle criticism well.

          1. Ted Treen
            Big Brother

            Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

            You're absolutely spot on.

            "I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it" is not a phrase which trips easily off a leftie's tongue.

            You're much more likely to get the shrill hectoring tones of Harridan Harman denouncing you as some sort of *ist, the slayer of babies & the fount of all the world's travails instead.

            Classic leftie style: If you can't beat 'em, sling loads of crap and see how much sticks.

            It's really rather frightening how often that a lie or inaccuracy is repeated a few times and then becomes effectively an incontrovertible fact - Are you listening, BBC, Grauniad, Citizen Toynbee, inter alia?

            1. Gordon Fecyk
              Thumb Down

              "Classic leftie style?"

              Classic leftie style[...] It's really rather frightening how often that a lie or inaccuracy is repeated a few times and then becomes effectively an incontrovertible fact.

              Like, say, "Obama is a muslim?" That's not exactly "leftie style" yet it is incontrovertible fact among certain sects of non-lefties.

              Where's the foot-in-mouth icon?

            2. Ted Treen

              Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

              @My earlier post - 20/02 @16:53

              Lots of downvotes - the loyal employees of Minitrue must be commenting...

          2. Someone Else Silver badge
            Devil

            @boltar -- Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

            Oooooh...name calling!

            How quaint.

          3. LionelB Silver badge
            Mushroom

            Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

            "Anyone with right wing views is labelled ignorant or reactionary or some other right-on putdown for anyone the "liberal" (read: totalitarian stalinist) lefties disagree with since they can't handle their naive world view being challenged and don't handle criticism well."

            Anyone with left wing views is labelled totalitarian stalinist or some other reactionary putdown for anyone the "conservative" (read: fascist nazi) establishment disagree with since they can't handle their naive world view being challenged and don't handle criticism well.

            There, fixed that for you.

            1. Richard Jones 1

              Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

              Sorry LionelBee-in-your-bonnet you fixed what exactly? Or did you not like your heroine Harlot Hariman being brought into the discussion.

              Just for the record I would be very happy to bring back public executions for those setting out to destroy the lives of others - that prat in charge(?) of the libelous demagogs for example and if you ask very nicely we might squeeze you in at the end of the event. Sorry it has to be the end, we would not like the paying punters frightened off would we?

        2. dcluley

          Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

          I too have the grey hair. My recollection of the Clarkson Bank Account details affair is that he only published the same details that anyone who writes a cheque publishes: bank sort code and account name and number. Charity direct debits are easy to set up by anyone giving correct details of an account not necessarily their own.. The Direct Debit system allows for incorrect payments to be reclaimed which, if I remember aright, was done in Jazza's case. All in fact worked as intended.

          1. Allan George Dyer
            Pirate

            Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

            @dcluley, it might have "worked as intended", but that is not the same as being a well-designed, secure system. Could a criminal set up a direct debit to a front company just using the same details? Could a criminal set up direct debits to a charity, then take the money from the charity because it is poorly administered (concentrating on its intended purpose)? How difficult is it to reclaim an "incorrect" payment? Do the banks care that their weak system allows their customers to be robbed?

            1. dcluley

              Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

              @Allan George Dyer. Your message was obscured by the sounds of moving goalposts. Yes criminals can commit crimes but that wasn't what the original comment was about.

        3. Vic

          Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

          > that doesn't necessarily make them invalid or willingly ignorant any more than yours are.

          Did you see him that time they had to build a Caterham?

          WIlfully ignorant. To the point that it was embarassing to watch.

          Vic.

          1. djack

            Re: I don't mind being compared by age...

            "Did you see him that time they had to build a Caterham?

            WIlfully ignorant. To the point that it was embarassing to watch."

            What, you mean where he's putting on an entertainment show, playing the incompetent clown?

            Put him in a different context where he is giving his opinion not just comedic* entertainment and he has a totally different set of apparent values.

            If you took almost everything on TG at face value, you would believe that all three of them could barely stand each-other and take great delight in endangering/humiliating the others. Watch the episode when Hammond comes back after his near-fatal crash - that mask significantly slips there.

            * Remember, comedy, like many other art-forms, is a subjective thing.

    3. C 18
      Facepalm

      <schrodinger section>He's just an attention seeking polemicist. Or probably some other type of malignant cyst.

      (Note: schrodinger sections don't need closing tags seeing as they probably don't exist.)

      1. madmalc
      2. Jamie Jones Silver badge
        Joke

        "(Note: schrodinger sections don't need closing tags seeing as they probably don't exist.)

        ...... or maybe they probably do?

    4. DrXym

      It's probably less to do with his age and more to do with being a professional Luddite.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        WTF?

        "It's probably less to do with his age and more to do with being a professional Luddite."

        Right, thats why he prefers Model-T Fords and not the latest supercars.

        Oh, wait...

    5. JeffyPooh
      Pint

      JC makes more in a week than the PoTUS makes in a year

      Just sayin'.

  2. This post has been deleted by its author

    1. LPF
      Meh

      Sad internet no mark.. that is all.

      See how that works?

    2. sabroni Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Baffoon!

      Classic, though not as good as "irrelephant", which I read here yesterday!

      1. TheRealRoland
        Thumb Up

        Re: Baffoon!

        Peddle to the Mettle?

  3. Alan Bourke

    The surname of that particular miniskirted poutresse ...

    ... is 'Gillan', I think you'll find.

    1. Robert Carnegie Silver badge

      I assume that she pushed them into the Time Vortex,

      and now they were never born. This also saves the effort of deleting the unwanted tweets manually. They just fade away like Marty McFly's family photos.

  4. Thomas 4
    Meh

    Uh-huh

    Nice try but it sounded a lot more scary when it came from Liam Neeson's mouth.

    1. bitten
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Uh-huh

      Taken? So Twitter is the name of his daughter?

    2. davidp231
      Thumb Up

      Re: Uh-huh

      Nice try but it sounded a lot more scary when it came from Liam Neeson's mouth.

      Even more so if he used is Hannibal persona from The A Team....

  5. ukgnome
    Facepalm

    He was paraphrasing "Taken"

    ** apparently - No, I haven't seen it either

    1. Annihilator
      IT Angle

      Indeed, still, well worth making an article out of a single tweet that was parodying a well-known film, eh?

  6. fixit_f
    Thumb Up

    Silly man

    He loves to threaten and annoy people. Which, you have to hand it to him, is pretty courageous given that the location of his house near Chipping Norton is public knowledge. Last time I went past he didn't have anything in the way of defenses up either, well unless you count an old fighter jet in the front garden....

    1. Psyx
      Pint

      Re: Silly man

      "He loves to threaten and annoy people. Which, you have to hand it to him, is pretty courageous given that the location of his house near Chipping Norton is public knowledge. Last time I went past he didn't have anything in the way of defenses up either, well unless you count an old fighter jet in the front garden...."

      I believe he owns a shotgun and once punched Piers Morgan in the face, if that helps his credentials in standing up for himself.

      1. JetSetJim
        Pint

        Re: Silly man

        He's got my backing purely from having punched Piers in the face. I don't suppose there's footage on Youtube?

        1. Psyx
          Pint

          Re: Silly man

          There wasn't when I looked a few years ago.

          He might be abrasive, but to my mind he gets an awful lot of kudos for doing it.

          Piers is certainly on my 'Top Ten People I Want To Punch In The Face' list.

          1. JetSetJim
            Unhappy

            Re: Silly man

            It would seem there's not even pictures (according to Google) and it happened at the 2004 Press Awards bash - you'd have thought there was a camera or two lurking around in a room full of journos!

            1. Psyx
              Pint

              Re: Silly man

              "you'd have thought there was a camera or two lurking around in a room full of journos!"

              Don't be silly: Journos know better than to let people with cameras in when they're drinking/snorting.

      2. robin48gx

        Re: Silly man

        Anyone who punched peirs morgan in the face is ok with me.

    2. Captain Scarlet Silver badge
      Pint

      Re: Silly man

      His car mad, I get in a car and all of a sudden I threaten and annoy people.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Stupid little boy

    People have been thrown in jail for making threats like that on Twitter. Hope someone throws the book at him. Then we'll see what a big, clever grown-up boy he is.

    1. LPF
      Thumb Up

      Re: Stupid little boy

      Big boys don't post AC! for a start ...

      But hey how about using your intelligence if you have any for just one second. Unless you have someone who is actually being threatned what crime has he committed idiot! Your so stupid and eager to be with the "In Crowd" that you did nto even think about the trite PC rubbish you posted.

      I could threaten to kill "Charlie Brown" , does not mean I have comitted a crime , unless you know, 1) he exists, 2) I meant that person.

      So why don't you step away from the keyboard and wait for school holidays to end.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Stupid little boy

        'Your so stupid'

        Sigh.

        1. Naughtyhorse

          Re: Stupid little boy

          At least is wasn't all capital letters.

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