back to article Disney buys Lucasfilm, new Star Wars trilogy planned

Disney has bought out Lucasfilm in a $4.05bn deal and announced a new trilogy of Star Wars films under the leadership of the entertainment behemoth. "For the past 35 years, one of my greatest pleasures has been to see Star Wars passed from one generation to the next," said George Lucas, CEO of Lucasfilm in a canned statement …

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  1. Esskay
    Unhappy

    How long before

    Disney decides a "reboot" is needed- featuring a younger, more sensitive Luke Skywalker, Chewbacca is now a "werewolf" with a six pack and Han Solo is (still) played by a geriatric Harrison Ford with a carefully camouflaged zimmerframe.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Devil

      Re: How long before

      Luke will be played by Micky Mouse, Lea by Mini Mouse (Ears work into the hairstyle nicely). Beast from Beauty and the Beast will play Chewbacca and Han Solo will be played by one of the many other disney characters.

      After Jar Jar Binks, what more could go wrong. If it means I can buy a toy lightsabre before I have to walk past the Apple store. Then so be it, I'm sold.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: How long before

        "Luke will be played by Micky Mouse, Lea by Mini Mouse (Ears work into the hairstyle nicely). Beast from Beauty and the Beast will play Chewbacca and Han Solo will be played by one of the many other disney characters."

        For some sick and twisted reason I cannot explain, I would actually like to see that.

        1. Peter Gathercole Silver badge

          Re: How long before

          You'll probably only have to wait until Kindom Hearts 5 (assuming that 4 is already complete!)

          1. Peter Gathercole Silver badge

            Re: How long before

            Oops. Kingdom Hearts 5.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Devil

        After Jar Jar Binks?

        Jar Jar Binks as re-imaged by the folks over there at Disney ..

        1. Captain TickTock

          Re: After Jar Jar Binks?

          Jar Jar will be played by Goofy. Of course

          1. wowfood

            Re: After Jar Jar Binks?

            Darth will have to be played by Pete.

            And if they have Goffy for Jar Jar, they'd need to use Donald for Han.

      3. John Bailey

        Re: How long before

        You forgot the singing.

        Every cast member will burst into song at key moments Later released as a limited edition CD every 7 years.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: How long before

          "Later released as a limited edition CD every 7 years."

          As opposed to the current Lucasfilm practice of releasing a "new extra special enhanced with nifty new features" edition every 7 years?

          We're a few years away from Jar-Jar in Smell-o-vision(TM)

    2. dssf
      Joke

      Re: How long before

      "Life from lifelessness."

      "It would destroy such life in favor of its new matrix."

      (Guess where those two quotes came from...)

      Definitely, it would create a new form of "star wars", hehehe...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: How long before

        "Life from lifelessness."

        "It would destroy such life in favor of its new matrix."

        (Guess where those two quotes came from...)

        Definitely, it would create a new form of "star wars", hehehe...

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        Star Trek II : Wrath of Khan

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: How long before

      How long before all popular works of fiction are owned by Disney?

      Seems they are much more interested in the money than creativity.

      1. Psyx
        Facepalm

        Re: How long before

        "Seems they are much more interested in the money than creativity."

        As opposed to Lucas Films?

        Disney StarWars films are going to be crap. But after the last twenty years of Lucas himself reaming his audiences with crap films and crap 'remasters', it's almost a relief.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Thumb Up

        Re: How long before

        "Seems they are much more interested in the money than creativity."

        Lucky for us that the young George Lucas was solely dedicated to high art, then. Imagine if he'd wasted his talent with a series of trashy sci-fi films, woodenly acted, and accompanied by endless merchandising?

      3. keith_w
        Unhappy

        Re: How long before

        and this is a surprise to you because?

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: How long before

      "Birth of the Jedi", about the discovery of The Force by a young High School student campaigning to drive the evil shale-gas frackers out of his rural hometown, and who connects with Gaia to preserve the environment and end global warming. Where's the vomit icon?

      1. jai

        Re: How long before

        yes, because that's exactly what they did with Tron, isn't it?

        and the Pirates of the Caribbean movies

        and The Avengers

        and from the looks of the trailer, Iron Man 3 is going to be chock full of Disney cartoon characters and singing, isn't it?

        1. Stuart Castle Silver badge

          Re: How long before

          That's just what is irritating me a little about the response to this. People forget that the films Disney produces don't necessarily include lots of singing and cartoon characters (although you could argue that Star Wars has actually included both anyway, remember Jar Jar, the Ewok Song and that singer in Jabba The Hut's palace).

          They also don't necessarily produce kiddie friendly films with cute characters and no gore. Look at the output of Miramax (which was a Disney studio between 1993 and 2010). They produced Pulp Fiction, a lot of Kevin Smith movies and various horror movies, none of which could be called remotely kiddie friendly.

          Look at the Marvel films. They had a bit of a shaky start, but have turned into enjoyable action films. They also haven't changed noticeably in style since Disney took over.

          Remember, Disney are a business. They are interested in making money with films. While films released under the Disney name have to be at least family friendly (to protect the Disney image), films released under the name of subsidiary studios don't have to be, as long as they make money.

          These new Star Wars film probably will be family oriented, but before deciding they will be crap, at least wait until we know more than the fact they are being made.

          1. beep54

            Re: How long before

            And never forget that there exists a David Lynch film that "Walt Disney Pictures presents" (The Straight Story). Most anything is possible now.

          2. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: How long before@Stuart Castle

            "remember that singer in Jabba The Hut's palace."

            Oooh yes. Yes indeed.

          3. Chris 242
            Flame

            Re: How long before

            Pru Stu.

            Not kiddie friendly "Pulp Fiction" you have to be joking!

            Music, simple dialog, identifiable characters and traumatic adrenaline shots to the heart.

            My 6 year old thinks this is better than "Pingu" and day of the week.

    5. Armando 123
      Coat

      Re: How long before

      Or a tv special with puppets, with singing and dancing and ... oh, wait.

    6. Benchops
      Thumb Up

      Re: How long before

      No, Disney will be very subtle:

      Imagine a fleet of three Death Stars.... one large mother Death star and two smaller versions just behind, camera pans down from empty space on to the fleet of three. The two smaller ones are behind the larger, just above to the left and right, suddenly the sun that was behind them is briefly uneclipsed and silhouettes them...

      Insidious.

      BTW, the LEGO Star Wars franchise is truly awesome: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wjRPyZkRVQk

  2. solidsoup

    Not worried.

    I'm not worried that Disney will ruin it. After all, it was already ruined by George L himself with the Prequel Trilogy. I just wish Spielberg would've sold Indiana Jones franchise to some one before the terrible sequel. Michael Bay would've done a better job and that's being charitable.

    1. MacroRodent
      Unhappy

      Re: Not worried.

      My thoughs exactly. At this stage, the Disney touch might even improve it... They could make it campy, a bit like the Lego Starwars short films (some of which are frankly better than the prequels). Cartoon versions with Mickey and Donald Duck, anyone?

      1. chr0m4t1c

        Re: Not worried.

        >Cartoon versions with Mickey and Donald Duck, anyone?

        In a shocking twist, Daisy turns out to be Donald's sister and they've both full of Mickeychlorians.

        I can't wait for Star Wars: LIve. The Musical. On Ice.

        1. Joe User

          Re: Not worried.

          > I can't wait for Star Wars: LIve. The Musical. On Ice.

          You mean like this?

          Robot Chicken's Star Wars Special: Empire on Ice

          http://videosift.com/video/Robot-Chickens-Star-Wars-Special-Empire-on-Ice

    2. Psyx
      Pint

      Re: Not worried.

      Michael Bay is Alfred Fucking Hitchcock compared to Geoge Luca$.

  3. QuinnDexter

    Hallowe'en

    Any kids that turn up trick-or-treating will automatically get double sweets. Extra credit for character with less than 10 minutes screen time

    I think this is a good thing. Take the stories away from Lucas and give them to a good director / producer like Disney have done with Marvel and we're on to a winner. Admiral Thrawn, anyone?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Gimp

      Re: Hallowe'en

      Thrawn trilogy would make a great set of sequels, the books capture the spirit of the original trilogy far better Lucas' prequels.

      That said think I'd prefer them to do something like BioWare did with Knights of the Old Republic (xbox 1 game) and set it in the same universe perhaps a thousand years in the future with a restored Jedi order and a resurgent Sith threat. That way they shouldn't make the mistakes of the prequels trying to make the story fit with the originals.

    2. Hoagiebot

      Re: Hallowe'en

      I for one have long wished to see actual Stars Wars movies get made from the two early 1990's Dark Horse Star Wars trade paperbacks "Dark Empire" and "Dark Empire II." They were written by Tom Veitch, and they actually spun off of the events from the Admiral Thrawn Trilogy. The Admiral Thrawn Trilogy was great, but I loved the two Dark Empire trade paperbacks even more. They featured a cloned Emperor Palaptine going on a galactic rampage with several new super-weapons, including the World Devastator machines, the Eclipse-class Super-Star Destroyers, and the Galaxy Gun. And if that wasn't enough, you got to see Jedi Master Luke Skywalker get turned to the Dark Side and take his father's place at the side of the Emperor and Boba Fett once again chase Han Solo, this time through the winding neon-colored labyrinths of the smuggler's moon Nar Shadda. I used to be quite the Star Wars-obsessed geek in my youth, at least until the Prequel Trilogy came out tarnishing things for me and causing me to move on to other geeky pursuits, but even so the two Dark Empire trade paperbacks are the two works from the Expanded Universe that I remember the most fondly. I realize that even with Star Wars having a new owner I will probably never get to see those trade paperbacks get turned into films, but you never know.

      1. AbortRetryFail
        Thumb Up

        Re: Hallowe'en

        Totally with you on that; Dark Empire was really rather superb.

  4. Eddy Ito
    Meh

    Big deal

    What will we get? Sucks Harder I, II & III, the post-pre-resequelated trilogy where Lick the offspring of Hand Solo and Princess Lay-Ya performs fellatio on an Ewok-Wookie hybrid while binking Jar-jar the undead.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Devil

      re: What will we get .. the post-pre-resequelated trilogy?

      'Star Whores', 'Star Whores: A New Grope' (the sequel) //

      1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
        Meh

        Re: re: What will we get .. the post-pre-resequelated trilogy?

        All my childhood ... destroyed!

  5. Damon 1

    Jar Jar Mouse - Disney Owns a Death Star (Photoshops)

    Disney Owns a Death Star

    http://www.vogvo.com/epcot-deathstar.png

    Jar Jar Mouse

    http://www.vogvo.com/Jar_Jar_Mouse.png

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Who's that next to Rolf Harris?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Val Doonican, I think.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Facepalm

    Ouch

    There goes the rest of nice memories I had about the movies that Lucas could not completely destroy......

    1. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

      Re: Ouch

      Now he can't any more!

  8. Neoc

    I keep on hoping...

    ... this is a Halloween prank scare.

  9. TheOtherHobbes

    Jar Jar Binks vs Eeyore

    What's not to like?

    1. Ron Christian

      Re: Jar Jar Binks vs Eeyore

      Only if Eeyore rips his throat out. And feels sad about it afterwards.

      1. Jediben
        Go

        Re: Jar Jar Binks vs Eeyore

        Oh my god, Eeyore as C3PO and Piglet as R2-D2. I am seeing light at the end of this tunnel.

        1. Tom 13
          Coat

          Re: I am seeing light at the end of this tunnel.

          Actually I think that's the end of a light saber and not the one you hold onto...

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    1. Neoc

      Re: Luke shot first

      Luke? Surely you mean Han...

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Next you'll be telling me that Greedo shot first.

    1. wowfood

      Disney re imaging. Greedo Shot first, and it was only a water pistol.

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