Only a passing mention
Mortal Kombat (the first one) was rather enjoyable I recall, especially the brilliant casting of Christophe Lambert, who you suspect was constantly thinking "how on earth did I get cast in this role?"
Capcom's Street Fighter series celebrates its 25th birthday this week and while the world is awash with various mementos – including boxsets and a dedicated Street Fighter site for fans to reminisce on their favourite moments – we decided it was the perfect opportunity to look back at the film adaptations of video game …
I remember that for every single action sequence having been cut and paste from another film. The literally tried to do a sequence from every genre; there's a carrier landing accident where they have to bulldoze a wrecked fighter off the landing deck which obligingly falls off the end of the deck... in zero G and a submarine-being-depthcharged (still in space at this point) sequence where all the senior officers spend a few minutes staring at the ceiling of the bridge while looking worried.
There's also the Final Fantasy film, that's ok.
Ah, Hitman - the movie with the missing S in the title. Clearly you have forgotten such plotting gems as the titular character getting into a four-way Mexican standoff with three other Hitmen ... who are all allied with each other and had attacked him as a group. The only redeeming feature that movie had was frontal nudity from Olga Kurylenko (which ironically made it better than the same year's Bond movie).
AndrewInIreland,
You bastard! I'd forgotten that Wing Commander film. Until now...
I've not seen many of these fortunately. I think I saw Resident Evil on telly, and that's it. It wasn't very good, but it was watchable, and I was bored or feeling lazy.
It's a pretty horrific thought to have to sit down and review 10 of them. I think the best options here are resignation, or setting up some compromising material on your editor's PC, so they're fired before they can make you witness the full horror.
Wing Commander and Tomb Raider are the only two movies even mentioned here that I've seen. And, frankly, the only reason for remembering WC is the soundtrack. Gotta love a soundtrack where one of the tracks is named, I kid thee not, "Big Damn Ending".
As for Tomb Raider, there are only two reasons for its existence, and they're frontally mounted on Ms. Jolie.
"As for Tomb Raider, there are only two reasons for its existence, and they're frontally mounted on Ms. Jolie."
I can't believe I'm going to complain about this but her bra was so stuffed with padding in that movie that I couldn't concentrate on the action scenes because of the two unnaturally static orbs strapped to her chest.
Now that I think about it though, this does seem reminiscent of playing the tomb raider games as a teen...
Agreed with Res Evil. It was quite a nice little zombie/survival flick with a bit of conspiracy theory thrown in for good measure. It is odd to see a film panned for not just playing on blood and gore effects.
Though it probably does say something about the skills and scripts of the main characters as they were all up-staged by the six year old girl playing Red Queen who, for me, outranks HAL as how a homicidal AI should operate.
Tbh i was not a fan of the games and the film was shit, but some of my friends rated DOA. would have thought it be on that list tbh.
"With such bad form, it's little surprise Blizzard laughed away Boll's approach to direct the upcoming World of Warcraft film."
Do Blizzard really need to bring in outside directors? Their cut scene work in D3 was mind blowingly good, even though the game sucked. They should be able to make an unbelievably pretty Warcraft film, the story line is already written so surly for them they just need to create the graphics.
In terms of films that haven't been made, I think the Portal games would do very well, especially the early years of Aperture Science. GTA Vice City had a bit of a weak plot but San Andreas and IV would also work pretty well. (I know there's a film called Grand Theft Auto but that has nothing to do with the games).
...would work as a brainless film. Mark Wahlberg seeks to escape the rising tide of violence in his Liandri Corp. mining colony so he enters the Liandi Corp. tournament. Cue increasingly montaged fight scenes, culminating in some sort of boss battle (perhaps with the actual boss of Liandri Corp., I think it was in the game) and some triumphant trophy hoisting. Who needs dialogue when things are exploding.
There is one film, which after waiting for it for what seemed an eternity, failed in such spectacular style even the greatest fan of the original material was driven to despair. The Hitch hikers Guide to the Galaxy must be the epitome of how not to make a film.
I know the Radio series, books and BBC were there first but it was quite a good game so I would consider its inclusion in this pile of turds should be a given.
Hitman was the only one of the bunch that i enjoyed, it was kinda like Jason Bourne with a shaved head........
The game Silent hill gave me the fucking creeps so I didn't bother with the film.
Surprised they haven't made Metal Gear Solid into a film series. ( I would love to see someone replace The Terminator)
I wonder if they will consider doing Uncharted as this is definately a candidate to replace Indiana Jones.
The silent hill film isn't too bad, especially when compared to other films in the genre of 'darkness, silence, music building tension, SUDDEN BOOGIE MAN!". Just don't watch it on TV in the UK because it's usually cut to ribbons. I think the UK DVD may have cuts as well.
What odious little shit should be strung up for the disservices he has done the gaming and movie industries. If ever there was a reason for extraordinary rendition to a country where torture is a national sport, Uwe Boll is it.
Paris, 'cause she doesn't mine a good boll now and then.
That's the thing about Boll, though. I think he's actually convinced that he's making good films. He really wants to make a great movie... he's just terrible at it. I'm betting the reason he's slowed his output is simply because, for now, there are no investors, and no one will let him use their video game for a film - not because the loophole has been closed.
I actually like the RE films, they are a bit of fun to watch if you totally ignore the actual RE part of it and just take it as a zombie shooter style movie. Of course, seeing Milla Jovovich naked makes the film totally perfect and devoid of any criticism ever. Indeed, if you have the worst movie in the world ever (as voted for by El Reg users) the films become instant classics if you have Milla Jovovich naked at the end.
Hell, even Twilight would become watchable if you had Milla Jovovich naked in it (albeit for the 5-10 seconds she appears).
I can't take this list particularly seriously, as it's omitted the only genuinely decent film I've ever seen that was based on a videogame - namely, Street Fighter: The Animated Movie.
As for whoever mentioned Portal, any feature-length film would need to be at least as good as Portal: No Escape:
(see http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4drucg1A6Xk if you don't know what I'm talking about).