back to article Unfeasibly vast amphibian found croaked on video card

As a postscript to last week's Ventblockers II shocker, we felt we had to share a final image with you, giving a pretty good idea as to why this particular video card croaked it: Mummified frog on video card A shaken Richard Boyle explains that he and his colleagues down at Sneakers Computers in Courtenay, British Columbia …

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  1. Warren 2

    Amphibipun

    As to how the frog got in their, I haven't the froggiest idea.

  2. Paul Rogers
    Coat

    Isn't it obvious?

    meta-material croaking device

  3. Pete 2 Silver badge

    Someone's gotta say it

    > so we don't know how it got in.

    Kermit protocol? (multi-hop, of course)

  4. Tanuki
    Thumb Up

    Not bugs but...

    I wish I'd taken pics of the failed H-P LaserJet-II I once had to strip.

    It lived somewhere damp. And was regularly used to print envelopes. Seems it had become home to a family of snails, who had developed an envelope-glue-eating habit as well as dying in interesting ways in the mechanism.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Clearly, a Transporter...

    Was the Video card used for developing SciFi video?

  6. HollyHopDrive
    Coat

    There is always one...

    Are you sure thats not just a configuration jumper on the board?

    Sorry, I'll leave quietly......

    1. CD001

      You sir,

      ... can have the gold star for best frog/PC related pun - ever.

  7. Disco-Legend-Zeke

    Maybe...

    ...it was a lot smaller when it entered.

    1. Uncle Slacky Silver badge
      Boffin

      Probably

      This is the same theory used to explain how frogs come to be found entombed (sometimes alive) in coal or rocks (or building foundations*) - it's possible that they entered when small and fed on insects which also entered through small holes.

      *"Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my ragtime gal..."

      1. sT0rNG b4R3 duRiD

        *"Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my ragtime gal...

        Oh my god...I thought I was old. You remember that one. You must be ancient! :P

    2. Annihilator

      Maybe..

      But what did it live off in order to grow that big?

      1. Yesnomaybe

        Hmmm..

        Bugs?

      2. sT0rNG b4R3 duRiD

        It lived off memory leaks...

        ..And then it tried to eat off page zero...

        *WALLOP*

        *SPLAT*

    3. Rob - Denmark
      Joke

      Living off ... what?

      Yeha, it has probably grown by eating bugs in the computer.

      1. Fluffykins Silver badge

        Yeah, it was probably a Windows machine

        Wouldn't have grown as big in a Ubuntu box - fewer bugs.

    4. Neil Hoskins
      Thumb Up

      yup

      You get the same thing with some kind of crevice-dwelling toad in Canada IIRC. They just crawl into a little cave whilst small, then just wait for the prey to come to them, and get bigger, and bigger...

    5. Colin McKinnon
      Happy

      Maybe it was smaller...

      ..then ate all the bugs?

  8. Efros

    Where's

    Angela Lansbury when you need her?

    1. Asgard
      Joke

      Mystery solved

      "Where's Angela Lansbury when you need her"

      She is doing time for multiple murders and framing people to sell her books.

      As for the video nasty croaked carcass cadaver, thats the new must have graphics card technology leap forward.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Frog != Toad

    It's a toad, doofuses.

    1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: Frog != Toad

      You can tell from that? I'm impressed.

      I saved a toad from getting squashed in the road recently. It was definitely a toad rather than a frog, but I could only tell because it wasn't dessicated and stuck to a bit of a PC. I picked it up with my bare hands because I am well 'ard.

      1. Alan 6
        Happy

        I'm willing to bet

        you kissed it just in case...

    2. I'm Brian and so's my wife
      Joke

      Plural of doofus?

      Doofii, shirley?

      1. JDB

        RIP Mr. Nielsen

        It's Doofi, and don't call me Shirley.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Headmaster

      @ Big Dumb Guy 555

      > It's a toad, doofuses.

      The plural is 'doofi'

      :)

      1. I'm Brian and so's my wife

        Doofi

        It's doofii, but that's not important right now.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Headmaster

        The plural

        of English words ending in -us is often problematic, as evidenced by the common disagreement over whether a word should become pluralised by adding -es or by removing the -us and adding -i or even -ii.

        Obviously, what is right is what is in common usage, so in a sense, everyone who uses one of the above is 'right', if enough other people use it.

        But tempers get heated and there is a desire among us grammar nazis to see mere normal people use the 'right' form.

        What should guide people into forming correct plurals of -us ending words is a knowledge of how the word is derived from Greek or Latin.

        This knowledge is increasingly rare these days. Its absence is a sure sign of State rather than Private education.

        Contrary to common belief, many -us ending words do not pluralise 'correctly' by replacing the -us with -i, but simply by adding -es:

        Octopus - derivation Greek. Plural Octopuses.

        Bus - derivation Greek. Plural buses.

        Virus - derivation Latin. No Latin plural. English plural viruses

        Syllabus - derivation Latin. Plural syllabuses

        However,

        Prospectus - derivation Latin. Plural prospecti

        Ignoramus - derivation Latin. Technically already a plural (of ignoro).

        Whatever you do here to pluralise, ignorami is incorrect.

        As readers of Register are all geniuses, they will be pleased to know that the correct plural of genius is not genii, but as I have indicated, geniuses.

        When in doubt, google authoritative sources, do not put what you believe to be right as it is so often wrong

        Have a nice day

        Hippopotamus

        Doofus - derivation the American gutter. Plural - whatever you like

        1. Mostor Astrakan
          Coat

          Chuckle

          "Bus - derivation Greek. Plural buses."

          You spend ages waiting for a bus, and then all of a sudden loads of bi come by!

          1. Mr Grumblefish

            Yes,

            but do you really want to admit to getting on a bi.

        2. Michael Chester
          Boffin

          Bus != Greek

          It's a shortened form of omnibus (for everyone) in Latin.

          And the -ii form is wrong for everything (it happens when replacing the -us with -i in a word ending -ius e.g. radius-radii)

          Also, technically octopus/platypus - octopodes/platypodes since these come from the Greek, but hardly anyone uses those.

          I half-remember a poem about the plural of rhinoceros, but cant find a link to it

          /pendant

    4. Cameron Colley

      @Big Dumb Guy 555

      Since there is no actual difference between a "Frog" and a "Toad" you can call it either.

      1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

        Re: @Big Dumb Guy 555

        It's an honour to have you here, Mr Attenborough.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Alert

        Differences :

        Toads and frogs have many similarities, including the way they look. But there are some basic differences between them. Toads have dry, warty skin, while frogs have smooth, wet skin. Frogs have tiny teeth on both upper and lower jaws, while toads lack any teeth. Frogs have longer hind legs than toads. So frogs jump, while toads hop. Female toads lay there eggs them in long, parallel strings, while female frogs lay their eggs singly, in small or large clumps, on the water surface.

        1. Nasorenga
          FAIL

          frog == toad

          "A distinction between frogs and toads, though common in popular culture, is not made in taxonomy."

          - Wikipedia article on "Toad"

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Boffin

            Sort of...

            All toads are frogs, but there is a taxonomic distinction in that true toads are all members of the bufonidae family. By either measure its a frog. I call Rana pipiens.

          2. Anonymous Coward
            FAIL

            taxonomy

            Moron ! you say that there is no distinction in taxonomy as in the wiki article , you don't understand taxonomy .

            Saying there is no distinction made in taxonomy between frogs and toads is irrelevant as this is like saying a domestic cat is no different than a lion.

            As I said before frogs and toads are different in response to a post saying they are the same , I know I'm correct so why don't you go and educate yourself .

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    title

    Things get bigger when heated? Graphics cards get hot..

  11. Lottie
    Joke

    giving a pretty good idea as to why this particular video card croaked it

    Because the frog wasn't DirectX 9 certified?

  12. Graham Bartlett

    Frog jokes

    Wow, toadally mummified. Incidentally...

    Little Johnny is out playing in the garden when the vicar comes past.

    "What are you doing there, Johnny?"

    "Stuffing a firework up a frog's arse, vicar."

    "That's 'rectum', Johnny."

    <BANG>

    "Damn right it did, vicar!"

    1. Disco-Legend-Zeke

      Alternate Punchline...

      ...was:

      Rectum, hell, killedem.

  13. Graham Bartlett

    Never mind the frogs

    When you've got Miss Piggy mummified in your PC case, be worried!

  14. Sceptic Tank Silver badge

    Frogger is dead.

    Apparently you can judge the health of an environment by the condition of its frog population.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    How did it get in?

    Perhaps with help from Tadpole Technology?

  16. Natalie Gritpants

    Getting in was easy

    It simply pressed the cdrom button, jumped on board and went for a ride.

    Once inside it realized it had forgotten the USB to serial port adapter so it couldn't log in with it's smartphone.

    Once it had finished eating all the bugs and spiders inside it croaked.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Alien

    Frogs have form for this sort of thing...

    This sort of thing has been going on since the 1800's...

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/harrypotts/4600824357/

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/harrypotts/4601441926/

  18. Dick Pountain

    VFrog

    Obvious, someone virtualised a tadpole and sent in its virtual image over Ethernet.

  19. Blofeld's Cat
    Coat

    Dried frog?

    Bursar! Those pills don't work on PCs not even the extra-strength ones!

    It's the octarine one with the other dimension in a pocket.

  20. JeffyPooh
    Alien

    Known science

    It was the same way that Douglas Adams got the sofa up the stairs.

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Swam in

    as a tadpol, then lived on flies until it finally croaked due to old age.

  22. Andy 115
    Coat

    Trying to escape...

    ...from the advances of an amorous monkey?

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