back to article 419ers flash big bucks cashcard

It appears the Lads from Lagos have decided to dump the traditional money transfer as a way of redistributing the billions of unclaimed dollars which each year pass through Africa's financial institutions en route to lucky recipients worldwide. Read on... From the FMF, Federal Ministry of Finance No 12 edid lane Idumota …

COMMENTS

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  1. Keith T
    Pirate

    Geography not a strong point

    "and all part of europe including asia,australia, south america, Antartica e.t.c"

    Now, I know that the E.U. is getting rather large but I was unaware that it encompasses most of the southern hemisphere.

    No wonder there's so many bloody immigrants - damn penguins coming over here etc. etc.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Obligatory "Paris Hilton is smarter than this" comment goes here.

    Or here. Whichever you prefer.

  3. Stephane Mabille

    Antartica ATM

    Don't worry about the weather dependent Fedex delivery for Antartica, just ask them to deliver the ATM alongside.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Re "Paris Hilton is smarter than this"

    She certainly is... they say it takes a genius to play the fool.

    She has proven her ability to manage her "brand" so successfully that she is now worth well in excess of what she ever stood to inherit. She has used every event in her life is an opportunity to add value to her name. Probably the best example of her skills was how she turned a low quality sudo-porn leaked avi file on the internet into the best selling adult dvd since Debbie does Dallas, making her a fortune... take that Ben Dover! She has successfully marketed a series of poor quality low budget "reality" shows, featuring herself playing the fool, into the most widely syndicated shows on television. She can sell anything from perfume to clothes to music. She nets more for public appearances then anyone else in the world - including former heads of state. She is an empire. And the kicker: she's not even actually pretty - it's all attitude. The second kicker: she has everyone believing that she is stupid.

    Pure Genius.

    And a little more on-topic... if you have time to waste, check out 419eaters.com - very funny indeed

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    She may be smart but...

    All that may be true, but remind me...

    Who is this Paris Hilton?

    Although, courtesy of The Reg icons, I suppose I now know what she looks like.

    I like the sound of sudo-porn though. Is it a washing powder?

  6. Anonymous John
    Unhappy

    Hmm.

    The last time I saw this version, it offered $11,000,000 but warned that ATM machines only allowed $1000 to be withdrawn daily.

    Which would take over 30 years. To say nothing of the interest on the account.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Linux

    sudo-porn

    For non-root users?

  8. Anonymous John
    Joke

    Re She may be smart but...

    "like the sound of sudo-porn though. Is it a washing powder?"

    No. It's an 18+ version of Sudoku..

  9. Bill Fresher

    Why not me?

    I haven't received this yet. Why not? I've fallen for all the 419 scams and if they're going to compensate people then why not me?

    Not fair.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Heh...

    This stuff is funny. I've noticed a lot of 419 mails going, "I've finally transferred those funds we were trying to transfer before, and here's a reward for your help!"

    This means that either the 419ers are hoping scam victims will forget that it was Oomga Boogwalay, noy Booga Ommwalay, who screwed them the last time, and run overjoyed to the bank to finally get their money back, OR that new marks will rub their hands in glee at the thought of screwing someone who tried to screw somebody else by taking their reward.

    Gotta love it. If I only got one copy of them each time, it'd be fascinating.

  11. Steve Browne
    Happy

    Cant wait for mine

    I am really fed up, I have only won €550,000 on lotteries this last quarter and I really need to improve my turnover in the run up to christmas.

    Only problem is, where do I find an ATM that dispenses dollars ?

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hmmm...

    Do these Lagos Lads deliberately make grammatical/spelling/factual errors deliberately because they think that it is what everyone expects, or is it done for our entertainment?

    Seriously, I know plenty of Nigerians and none of them speak such poor English - most of them have pretty decent English.

  13. Dave

    The scary part is

    that at least 10000 people will fall for this. Mostly Americans.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Linux

    Still using dollars? How quaint!

    With the falling value of the dollar, I'm starting to see a few 419 spam e-mails offering to transfer millions of euros to my account.

  15. LaeMi Qian

    re: grammatical/spelling/factual errors

    Chances are the Nigerians you know with not so poor English have real jobs so don't have to perpetrate 419 scams.

  16. hans
    Coat

    Dollars

    All of Europe and they pay in dollars?

    Im asking my Scottish labour party candidate if this is legal, as it is in an e-mail....

  17. peter

    re: grammatical/spelling/factual errors

    I thought the point of the spelling errors was to make the recipient feel more intelligent than the sender, as mentioned in previous Reg articles. Adds to the reason why they cant work out how to withdraw the money themselves..

    Although they may be using a wireless keyboard , which if i dont edi comes out ie this.

  18. heystoopid
    Jobs Halo

    Hmm

    Hmm , those stupid Yankee suckers are born every minute that's for sure , but it is the great Amerikan Myth of the great overseas lottery win where they did not pay one centavo for the ticket is it not !

    Although , gotta feel sorry for those poor old Lagos Internet Coffee shop owners caught between a rock and and a hard place with these 419 scum and the paid police associates in their employ !

    But then again , being caught by one of these 419'ers scammers is a wonderful excuse in the new Union of the Soviet States of Amerika for those women so inclined to the use of Shotguns to shoot unsuspecting male spouses in the back at under five feet though , for the dead cannot defend themselves against perjury , slander and libel can they !

  19. John
    Linux

    ATM cash delivery driver

    I hate refilling those ATMs in Antarctica. The long plane flight, the cold, nothing to eat but pengiun sarnies and the notes get all frosty and brittle in the machine.

    Lately, the McMurdo Station cash machines have been running out even faster, it must be those Lads from Lagos offering free cash again!

  20. Steve B

    Spelling and Grammar will improve in a few years.

    Labour have announced that the quality of education in England will improve and children will be taught a second language at school (probably English).

    When this raises the standard it will become known as the "great Labour Education Balls up".

  21. Slaine
    Heart

    My response in "419er"ese

    Dear fiend,

    Most happiness I see when I am reading youre email to be telling me of the superior windfall that is to become my post in the FedEx mail from you.The last few months have been very harrowed as I wait to hear more news of my long lost uncle who has mysteriously died in a motoring incident after many fruitful years working in the acquisitions department of the most prestigeous "Bank of Nigeria and other European Nations" and of his glorious secretary who desperately wishes my having these many millions of (insert currency) to benefit from in return only for my personal details and not for running a scam on my identity.It is good to

    get you're emails because I know that there is upstanding honest people in the world and you must be one of them.

    ...actually, I love these emails, complete with their fantastic grammatical gaffs, spelling atrocities and the most outlandish promises of insane monetary gains. It is quite impossible for me to be taken in by such a scheme for the simple fact that there is not one millionaire on the planet who is also an illiterate retard. And then I remember the football association, and my head begins to hurt really bad. Where's the "Don't Panic" icon?

  22. triky
    Heart

    Quatloos

    http://www.quatloos.com/brad-c/directory01.htm

    Probably akin to the afore-said 419eaters, but I have to put in a good word for Brad. I've lost many an office hour (and much credibility among my colleagues with muffled choking snortling) pouring over his correspondence with ignorant scammers. I do love that site :)

  23. Colin Millar
    Coat

    @Slaine

    there is not one millionaire on the planet who is also an illiterate retard

    Prince Charles isn't a millionaire?

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